Depression
It took me awhile to see what was going on. Fatigue could be due to slow recovery from surgery with fibromyalgia thrown in, and the fact that I have been unable to get as much exercise as usual. Excessive game playing might be because the game is so absorbing and entertaining - right? Lethargy could be because ... no, I've run out of excuses. It's depression. Of course it's depression. The conclusion became inescapable.
I called my psychiatrist's office yesterday and begged for an appointment today. They fit me in.
Taking action
I hadn't seen Dr. Meyer since mid-August - the week before surgery. Too long. Recently I had a conversation with a remarkably stable bipolar friend who told me she sees her pdoc every two weeks. This made me think that perhaps I've been making a mistake in seeing mine as rarely as possible. How can he be aware of how my bipolar disorder is treating me if he sees me only every six to eight weeks? Too much can happen in that much time - too many fluctuations that I will have forgotten about by the time I see him.
I started writing this article when I got up this morning, so when I saw the doctor, I had everything I needed to tell him fresh and somewhat organized. He made several recommendations and two medication changes:
- Suspend the diet for now. It's making me feel trapped.
- Increase my hours at work more quickly if physically possible. I'm far less depressed at work, where there is structure and external discipline, than I am at home.
- Increase Celexa from 30 to 40mg per day.
- Increase Wellbutrin SR from 100 to 200mg per day.
- Monitor my blood pressure to make sure the increased Wellbutrin doesn't raise it again.
- Call him in a week if I am not better, and come back in two weeks.
