i am nothing

by Spectrum03

i am nothing

i stare at nothing
for it makes no sense
why bother
i am confused

i used to be intelligent and sparkly
now i sleep, dark-eyed and sallow
tired..oh so tired......
sleep is my friend...
it holds me in its arms
and takes away the pain
for awhile.

i am invisible
even in the light
it is dark
for no one sees me
i am an outcast
with a mental illness
to be shunned and feared

no one wants me
i am alone
i am nothing
destined to live a life of drugs
and a broken heart

for i am nothing
and no one wants me
i am alone

in the darkness
in a prison

and the prison has nothing to do
with my home
it is in my mind
where jumbled thoughts and fears reside
afraid to be released

they cannot be seen, though, for i do not exist
i have been erased
and am invisible
to a world that sees but does not see
me and all the others

who view the world
with such angst
our thoughts and feelings
irrational
controlled ? with drugs and counsel

i talk to no one
for no one calls
and i do not call them

i am invisible
i do not exist
therefore cannot be reached
by anyone

should i even care
should i?

Spectrum03 is a member of our Bipolar Disorder community, and originally posted this poem on our Forum.