I've always loved horses and dogs since I could talk. When I was 12, I finally got my first horse. We boarded her at the farm of an Appaloosa horse breeder. It's where I learned to ride, to know a good horse, and most of all, to have the time of my life. I've had a few major victories with my own home breds - some state champions, and my very own top 10 Appaloosa World winner in Jr. Reining (I can explain that some other time). I've always had at least one dog in my life as well. Each time I lose one, I bawl like a baby - and then go on with another.
I graduated from college after an unillustrious 6 years with a degree (finally), a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Printmaking, in 1978. That November I finally married Jeff. We'd only waited five years, lol. As of last November, it's been 25 years, not all of them smooth.
But that's as much detail as I will go into that. What happened, happened. It managed, along with a year that managed to be the worst ever in my life, to culminate in what at first were anxiety attacks. That event had my personal physician suggest that we seek some counseling together.
Bad went to worse. I became severely depressed. I didn't want to go anywhere. Only about two of the signs listed in the "are you depressed" guidelines didn't fit me. I lost interest in everything. I lost weight. I forgot to pay bills, and we know how that gets. My one good horsewoman friend was hauling me and my yearling to a show, and she could tell right away their was something wrong; she was also a psych-ward nurse. She got me hooked up with her personal pdoc. Yes, she also knew from personal experience. Kismet had saved me again.
It's been about seven years since my diagnosis. Like many, I'm meds intolerant, so it's always a careful blending for the great doc i'm now seeing (doc #1 was good, but he wasn't what I needed). Also, years of being in therapy have helped me to know how to listen, to know when to think things out. Alongside of the one-on-one, I've also attended group therapy this long as well. It's where I've honed my skills and have learned to heal.
The internet gave me the chance to make some new friends and to expand my life's boundaries again, slowly but surely. And I have all of you, my bipolar.about friends, too.