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 Marcia Purse

What Is Wrong with Me?

By May 23, 2007

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I am happy, yet, I feel miserable...
I am quite healthy, but I always feel sick...
I sleep enough why am I always tired?
I know I am loved, so why do I feel alone?
What is wrong with me?
by Kaladej

Update October 12, 2009: Since we first posted this blog in 2007, we've received hundreds of comments from readers who search the term "what is wrong with me" just like you. This really highlights that in this age of information at our fingertips, we take our questions to the internet. It is no surprise that if you are experiencing emotional upheaval or mental difficulties you would also use this tool to try to figure out what is going on with you. Googling symptoms is now the norm.

Update November 25, 2009: It is perfectly normal to have days where you feel low and days when you are on top of the world. The emotional rise and fall of life is part of the human condition. So how can you tell when your experiences are normal and when they've pushed into the extremes of depression or mania associated with bipolar disorder? Should you consider scheduling an appointment to be evaluated by a psychiatrist? Consider three basic rules of thumb.

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Comments
April 27, 2006 at 4:03 am
(1) Richelle says:

I feel like that too

May 24, 2006 at 7:35 am
(2) Jas says:

people are often douches when it comes to depression, even people who have it themselves can be unsympathetic.
Despite what people tell you depression doesn’t really have a ‘typical’.
Cases vary and the rest is guess work.
When one goes undiagnosed, untreated it can lead to feelings of:
What is wrong with me?

May 24, 2006 at 11:05 am
(3) Brian says:

That hits the nail right on the head. Thank you for sharing, at least now I dont feel as if I am the only one who feels that way.
Thanks again.

June 20, 2006 at 12:57 pm
(4) Nat says:

wow thats just how i feel, i was confused about it and thought i was weird, no one belives me when i say how i feel and i dont really understand how i feel myself recently. thank you for being so brave as to share that because it helps me know i have a problem and that im not just strange or attention seeking. it really helps.

September 13, 2006 at 3:17 pm
(5) Laura says:

I feel that way too. I was diagnosed with Bi-polar several years ago and have been taking Lamictal. It was working, but I have been having bout with it again. It may be normal life changes that are making me feel this way, as well as you. Talk to a psycologist, a good one. I’ve gotten help from a wonderful one and they can provide insight and help you uncover reasons why you feel this way.
Good luck.

October 25, 2006 at 4:59 pm
(6) Greg says:

Out of desparation and boredom, I typed “What is wrong with me?” into Google search and up came this. It is so me..

March 15, 2007 at 2:51 am
(7) Sarah says:

Commenting on comments…Greg, I did the same thing you just did. Is bi-polarity a possibility or is this just a concequence of being human? I was diagnosed with depression nearly 2 years ago and have been on anti-depressants since, but I am still not whole.

March 26, 2007 at 2:24 pm
(8) Hemal says:

I did the exact same thing as Greg, and i was so relieved that someone else also feels exactly the same way as i feel sometimes. Guess the world is a small place after all.

March 29, 2007 at 7:21 pm
(9) Matt says:

I am sure this is a normal feeling at sometime in everyone’s life. I feel the same way right now. There are many changes in my life, new friends, new places, different responsibilities. All of this change stresses me out so much, I feel like the world is upside down. I want to just stay in my dorm and let nothing happen in there. I feel alone, scared, sometimes terrified and cannot sleep. What is happening in my life, the world, and in the future to come, and in the past, and present bewilders me. Sometimes, I don’t know how to take it either. I need help, but it is embarrassing to ask. I wish I had the answers…all I can say is keep going on.

April 4, 2007 at 12:50 pm
(10) Anastasia says:

I also typed in “What is wrong with me” and found this posting. I feel so guilty that I can’t find a way to feel happy and whole when I have a wonderful family and much to be happy about. From the outside looking in the picture is clear but from the inside looking out, everything is distorted. I just wish I could gain that outside perspective.

May 10, 2007 at 7:00 am
(11) mary says:

wow i share the same sentiments as you matt and like all the others, i typed in ” whats wrong with me” and this came up. im real glad too that there are so many others that share the same situation as me. i too find fear in too many places and escape to my dorm but this dosent make me feel any better. there are so many opportunities that i tell myself to let go and shake off that fear, but it always creeps back, like a mild that grows from within and swallows me whole. i wnat to tell some1 but i cant verbalise that feelign inside. people see me as a happy go lucky, hell of a positive feller, but i know im the other and i wnat to stay that way for thier perception of me. they say that a happy person is only seemingly happy and deep inside them is a damn screwed up hellhole. i’ve problems performing in sch, relating to my classmates, therefore this barricades me from becomign friends with them, problems in my social life. im 22 going on 23 and i dont want to live like this forever. living in fear, living in a shell, retreating. i want my confidence back. plese help.

May 14, 2007 at 1:21 pm
(12) Youdi says:

Ha same as alot of people above, I’m a student at school i just did 2 very bad years of college and i want to know why I can’t get anything going here because I did so well in high school, I had seen a counselor, but she told me she wasn’t a psychiatrist so she had no advice really to give, looking for someone to talk to who might know why I do the things I did I googled many other things…none of them pointing me to a list of Therapists in my area that I can see so that I can get better… so then i googled “What is wrong with me…”

May 22, 2007 at 9:51 am
(13) imran says:

OMG, I also typed what is wrong with me in google and ended up here. Despite friends and family i feel so alone andwithdrawn with no interest in other people or the world, sometimes I can’t even get up to switch off the light or the TV when I go to sleep, some people think I am just downright lazy and others think I am just abit wierd. I don’t know what to think anymore, will anyone ever realise that maybe there really is something wrong with me, my moodswings are not something I have control over and I always feel bad when it’s too late, I hope we all manage to get better….. Heres hoping eh,,,,

May 22, 2007 at 9:51 am
(14) imran says:

OMG, I also typed what is wrong with me in google and ended up here. Despite friends and family i feel so alone andwithdrawn with no interest in other people or the world, sometimes I can’t even get up to switch off the light or the TV when I go to sleep, some people think I am just downright lazy and others think I am just abit wierd. I don’t know what to think anymore, will anyone ever realise that maybe there really is something wrong with me, my moodswings are not something I have control over and I always feel bad when it’s too late, I hope we all manage to get better….. Heres hoping eh,,,,

May 23, 2007 at 2:53 pm
(15) Virginia says:

Wow, I feel like all the rest of you. I have had it since I was little (looking back) but wasn’t diagnosed until 20 years ago, AT the age of 25. I have been through hoards of medication, therapy, relaxation, meditation, more therapy, more meds, etc. I still don’t get it. Because once I “get it” it slips my mind. And I go back into an episode, severe mania then down into the throes of hell in a large and deep black hole. This is not fun at all. The only advice I have (and I know how very hard this is) ~ when you are feeling down and/or suicidal, try to remind yourself that this will pass with time. Get medication help (with antipsychotics like Geodon, Respirdal, etc) ask MANY QUESTIONS! It is not normal for your Dr to have you on it past an acute state of mania/depression. It WILL cause physical problems that only worsen as time goes on.
I wish you all (and me) the best.

May 27, 2007 at 6:55 pm
(16) Nicole says:

I could be reading my life for the last 5 years in everyones comment. I am so tired of people telling me that I have such a wonderful life and I should look at the good parts of it. They are looking at the outside and I am looking from the inside. Some days I don’t even get off the couch, and I sleep all day and then the next day I am flying around crazy. When I tell my family that my body hurts as well as my mind they dont understand. 5 years ago i had it together and now I have no idea who is waking up tomorrow.

June 7, 2007 at 4:36 pm
(17) Johnny says:

You should take a long look at your life and decide if you’re really happy. Meds and chemical imbalences is only part of the picture. You may think, or in fact believe, that your have a happy life but if you feel the way you do, than it’s probable that deep down there is something in your life that is really bothering you. D

Depression must be attacked and treated at the root, not simply by pills which do an excellent job treating the symptoms for a while and then stop working.

It’s hard to face up to these things and be completely honest with yourself but you must do in order to stop being depressed.

Good luck.

June 12, 2007 at 5:49 am
(18) Carla says:

Hi all! I did just the same as a lot of you, ie: type “what’s wrong with me” in google and … here I am. I’ve been like this for a few years now, everyone telling me that I should be happy as I am in good health, married to a husband who loves me and have a wonderful 9 year-old daughter together… I have days/weeks when I feel really happy and optimistic and then one day I just wake up and it’s like I’m someone else, I feel sad (for no apparent reason) and feel I have nothing to look forward to so … what’s the point of it all? All your comments helped in some way or other and I’m going to take up some advice and try to get some help. Thanx and let’s cheer up ;-)

July 1, 2007 at 6:17 am
(19) Heather says:

Karma. Yup, I really did also type what is wrong with me in Google and I got here. I today was having such suicidal thoughts just because my boyfriend and me got into it. I was so upset. I don’t know if you can OD on Tylenol PM but damn was I thinking about taking the whole bottle. I don’t even know why. I told my b/f today how upset I was (minus the suicidal thoughts) and he just doesn’t understand. He is bi-polar. Medicated and sedated to a point. Also on Latimnal or whatever. I don’t know. When I think about my life, I should be happy but so many thoughts run through my head every day all day. All of the good and the bad thoughts. Good thoughts turning into bad thoughts. My heart breaks constantly. I can vividly see awful things happen in my imagination and its like I can’t shut it off. I don’t know. To be honest, I don’t know if I’d ever commit suicide. I mean seriously, I know its wrong. But there are times like right now, that I don’t understand why I feel this way. So sad, and alone. Even if me and him made up and I yet I still feel so hollow and I have no explaination. I don’t know. Any ideas.

July 25, 2007 at 4:12 am
(20) Anne says:

hahaha…unoriginally I’m sitting here thinking “what’s wrong with me” decide to do a google search and here you all are :-) . unlike heather, I rarely have dark thoughts…I’m pretty happy go lucky and have everything to be happy go lucky about…but there’s this subdued, miserable, dull feeling inside, that comes and goes and I can’t seem to explain it.

August 9, 2007 at 2:13 am
(21) dina says:

anne hit the nail on the head… overwhelming sadness with the world, even when nothing bad is happening. cant seem to shake it off. it never stops! aslf! why wont my brain just give me a rest?

August 13, 2007 at 3:11 pm
(22) Tari says:

I too have been plagued with days and days of depresison sprinkled with a couple of days of extremely high spirits. I am a Christian and I often beat myself up for feeling this way because Christians are suppose to depend on God for all of their needs and generate real joy from Him. I try to tell my b/f and I think he kinda understands that IU am depressed; but he often tells me to think about the positive things in my life. When I do, I become even more depressed for actually being depressed and conclude that I can never regain my life the way it used to be – content in any situation I am in. I am afraid he will eventually leave me because when I am sad and stressed, I lash out at him and we argue for days!! I ignore him and I am upset with him for like 10 days straight and comunication is to bare minimun. I don;t want to treat him thta way, but I often feel that I can’t control it. Everything he does irretates me when I am like that. I feel so horrible! He deserves better. I tried to break up withhime 3 different times over 21/2 years but he says he loves me and he will never leave. Why can’t I stop huirting him?

July 21, 2011 at 3:02 pm
(23) Lori says:

Even as christians we have many ups and downs, just look at some of the bible heroes of faith. Elisha under the broom tree is one. God is still here for us and understands our struggles. Sometimes we just need to accept things as they are and ‘be still and know that He is God’.

I find that when i eat a lot of junk or processed foods i have a harder time controlling my moods (and actions).

If you have been baptized into christ for the forgiveness of your sins and seek him continually, don’t worry, he will reward and comfort you in due time. I know it is so hard some times but perservere and take heart.

October 25, 2007 at 5:27 am
(24) andrwew says:

ditto!

November 3, 2007 at 11:27 am
(25) Nikki says:

I’m reading these comments and crying because it’s so unbelievable how similar my feelings and thoughts are. For the past few months I’ve been feeling like life isn’t worthwhile, I just want to sit in my room everyday alone and do nothing. In school I used to be sooo motivated but ever since I started uni I haven’t been able to concentrate. It’s getting me down so much!

December 5, 2007 at 9:26 am
(26) Laura says:

I googled the same thing as the rest of you. Funny how this turned out to be a catch-all and sort of a relief for those of us who feel that the little verse on the main page was written just for us. I’ve been experience severe mood swings for the past 8 months. I was in therapy for 3 years prior to the onset of these symptoms, and I would have stayed on therapy if it wasn’t for the fact that I moved 300 miles away. That probably delayed these from coming out. My grandfather suffered from acute bi-polar disorder and I would dare say my mom has it as well, but she fights it so much… I don’t know how she does it. I have not yet been diagnosed, but I can relate to all of your comments and frustrations.

You are grabbing onto anything you can; yesterday… I stayed home from work, just because I didn’t want to go in late, I called in and made up some horrible lie and stayed in my apartment all day. I didn’t leave the house at all. If I would have been at work, I would have been thinking of all the things I could do if I were home (clean, cook, laundry, etc.), and I was home… I didn’t even get out of my PJs. My poor boyfriend does everything to motivate me; he put me on an exercise program, began planning a vacation, helped me paint and decorate my apartment… nothing seems to take this away. I feel like if I’m missing a major part of my soul. I see this life just outside my reach, a life I want, but I’m trapped behind this glass wall. Songs make me cry, thoughtful movies drag me into strange whirls of thought. I just thank God that I don’t do drugs, because then I would never be cured. All I do is seek that higher sense of being, that not even church provides me with anymore.

I wish I could go back into therapy, but I have no insurance benefits and I can’t afford it out of pocket. Sometimes we just have to pull through the tough times and I hope this leg of the trip is almost over.

Good luck to all of you out there, you are all in my prayers.

January 11, 2008 at 10:22 am
(27) Me says:

I did the same exact thing: typed – what is wrong with me.

I think I am bipolar but I don’t seem to have the mania episodes. How I feel is not just depression. It is so much more.

I don’t feel like I am a lazy person but all I want to do is shut myself in a room & never have to come out.

Nothing seems to trigger that true “happy feeling” – Nothing!

I have a wonderful life. A brand new home, brand new vehicle, great paying job, a handsome & loving husband but I don’t feel ANYTHING! EVERYTHING seems to irritate me – even hearing someone talk, being too heavy footed when walking, chewing too loud, – EVERYTHING

My docter has taken me off of Cymbalta & put me on Lexapro. It seems now the terrible body aches have come back. I feel no better but he is trying different things so when do I know when I am normal? Is anyone actually normal?

I just want to fix whatever is wrong with me so I can feel like a human being with real emotions.

January 25, 2008 at 1:49 am
(28) Tifa says:

I feel really miserable today. I guess that is because I am so worried about things surrounding me. I am too concerned what people thought of me when I talked to them. I know this is ruining myself. However, I can not avoid to keep thinking about it.

Anyhow, feeling blue sucks…..I know! Move on and move forward ,,,,,learn from the mistakes……

January 28, 2008 at 4:10 am
(29) Mike says:

Out of sheer anguish I typed in What Is Wrong With Me in Google this morning and it brought me here. It’s nice to know there are more people that feel like me but at this point, that doen’t help. I’m just about done for if I can’t get some relief!

January 29, 2008 at 5:58 pm
(30) jeff says:

we should all go start our own planet……nevermind…..bad idea!!!!

January 31, 2008 at 10:33 pm
(31) jess says:

i have typed this in before and found that my searches don’t match. not surprising. i have not been diagnosed with anything. i am, however, on antidepressants that i really don’t want to sink low enough to take. feels weak, somehow. i have the normal ups and downs, as most people do… but it seems to take so much longer to get put back together again. and even then… i lost another piece somewhere along the way. don’t feel equipped enough to handle… what? life? yeah. but nothing’s really wrong. in fact, things are great! so… why don’t i FEEL them? i see so much improving daily, and i try real hard to be appreciative. i SEE the outcomes, the benefits. but… deep sigh… what’s wrong with me? i have felt THIS way since i was nine. i went to a few councelors (sp?) the most recent, i remember, said i have too many issues and need to find someone ELSE to work with permenantly, and smiled as she showed me the door. i haven’t been in to see anyone since. that cut slightly deep – i would never admit. i just smiled and walked to my car, as if i was leaving a resturant, going back to work. no matter. gloss it over. stuff it. the real kicker? i don’t even know quite what i said that would bother anyone. this feeling that doesn’t come and go, but IS always present, in the background of just about every moment… i just gave up. this is the way things are. cut this piece off, adapt, move on. with or without yourself. cause OTHER people are depending on you, even if you aren’t. make the best effort i can. and then go home and lock the door. lock everything out.

February 1, 2008 at 7:01 am
(32) Philippe says:

Did also the same, google, what’s is wrong with me. I’m now in my 2nd year college and again screwing up like last year, high school was no prob at all… I also feel very tired even if I sleep 10 hours or more a night. I got my blood checked twice, nothing, perfectly healthy. Strange there are so much similarities between each one of us. Take care all.

February 4, 2008 at 8:36 am
(33) April says:

I almost started crying! I couldn’t believe that I was reading other people’s answers. I was sitting here not wanting to go to work, feeling worthless and ashamed because I felt I was someone with a “poor work ethic”. And I just might be someone who can be helped. I have been diagnosed with clinical depresession several times in my life and have done the medication route but the co-pays for both the counseling and medication is getting so high that it is getting to where I won’t be able to do either one. It makes me feel somewhat better to know I am not alone.

February 5, 2008 at 4:42 pm
(34) Dustin says:

man, i decide to randomly type in “What is wrong with me” on google, and this appears…and it describes me PERFECT!

February 11, 2008 at 12:48 pm
(35) Caramia says:

Try being 72 years old, married 52 years to the man, living a lie to my own children that I am Mrs. Happy Homemaker. Why can I meet total strangers, laugh and be told what a “wonderful person” I am, then go home to my husband who says, “it’s all in your mind”. I am going to see my MD and my husband has an appointment 1/2 hour later, for him it’s a check up, for me, I want answers. Yes, he is a good man, provider and still is working. I leave him notes, about what is happening and he either pitches them or……….then I am left alone, no friends,he broke that up years ago, my adult children think he is great and I pretend all is fine……it isn’t CF

April 19, 2011 at 12:26 pm
(36) susie says:

if u hate it now. try being 13 and trying to love the world but end up hating every second of it.

February 13, 2008 at 1:33 am
(37) andrew says:

wow so many of us, myself included, typed in “what is wrong with me?” and ended up here amazing. we all harbor the same feelings though we cannot find comfort in anything else at times we, well at least i, can find some comfort in the fact that i am not alone.

February 15, 2008 at 4:28 pm
(38) Sheilla Burton says:

I have been under a phyciatrist for many years
only recently have i been diagnosed as having Borderline personality disorder, It sounds very much the same as bipolar, is it the same or two different problems,, I had no further help from anyone,
Can you verify the difference and can i get any help from anywhere. Regards Sheilla

February 16, 2008 at 11:37 pm
(39) Lee says:

I too typed in what is wrong with me and got this website. My mood swings are crazy! one minute im fine, the next I hate everybody, the next im scared, the next im fine again. It goes on and on and on………

February 16, 2008 at 11:45 pm
(40) Lee says:

Caramia,

I go through that every day with my husband you bare so not alone.

February 17, 2008 at 9:39 pm
(41) rikki says:

Wow, I never thought I would hear other folks talking about the way I feel. I have had depression problems my whole life but lately I just don’t want to be around anyone. I can barely manage a conversation for any length of time and then I wonder why I don’t have any friends.
The world seems NUTS and I may be too.

February 19, 2008 at 6:15 pm
(42) Sonia says:

I got here typing the same. I feel I’ve lost the spark and the enthusiasm and the joy of life that used to live in me. I saw a counsellor but I couldn’t find the words to get it across to her. She thought I was being self-indulgent, that deep philosphy and ‘am I happy?’ thoughts are a luxury in the Western World. She’s right, I know, but I still feel like this. I’m sorry because now I feel guilty for feeling like this. It’s not so much that stuff is bad it’s just not good. It’s grey. Like everything I see/do/consider I think ‘what’s the point’? Like what’s the point in being creative as what does it matter anyway? What’s the point in communicating as it’s just some tiny little thing zipping around this planet… I struggle to be present as I’m always wondering ‘why?’ about everything. Even self-improvement techniques seem futile as, again, what’s the point of them in this whole scheme of things? The last time I truly ‘felt’ was while listening to ‘over the rainbow’ – the IZ version. I cried and cried and thought thank god I’m feeling something. I mention it as some of you may find beauty in it too. The book ‘the power of now’ by eckhart tolle is wonderful too. It came to me while reading it that the constant ‘what’s the point’ stuff may be a trick of my ego to piss me off. And my ego isn’t me. Hey, as I write this I am feeling again. I actually feel for the first time in ages that I’ve made a difference on this planet by sharing words that may be of help to some people. I want to help people but need to get past all this screw up stuff before I can. I am crying as I write this thank you thank you thank you. Am I too buttoned up or too in touch, who knows? I think we all need to find where we see beauty and not give a shit if other people scoff or laugh. I come from a very practical family not known for their emotional connection and here I am this huge hippy pretending not to be. Thank you for listening to this stream of consciousness. Love to you all….

February 20, 2008 at 10:34 pm
(43) Ryan says:

I typed What is wrong with me into google too… now i’m not bipolar, I just hate my high school I’m ok with most students but the teachers drive me crazy and always act like they know who I am and put me down and the only thing I have done is been late to school and am told thta makes me an apathetic and dishonest individual when i don’t know what I did?[besides being late] The school called my house about being late and I accepted that you knwo I should be on time and mostly I’m usually like a minute or two late. So now I’m on time but I try to talk to my parents about what my teachers say to me about not being accepted in the community when I have a shit load of friends it’s just the teachers who don’t like me. My dad as always takes the teachers side and tells me what they do but he has never taken my side !ever! so idk. I mean all my friends tell me that the teachers kinda pick on me specifically and I’m not asking for sympathy here I’M NOT. I’m asking for advice before I snap into either anger or deep depression. I feel like I can’t take it anymore and wonder what you guys think I should do.????

February 20, 2008 at 10:48 pm
(44) Ryan says:

I too typed What is wrong with me into google and was brought here. We all seem liek we are in the same sort of predicament. For me though; I just hate my high school. I have a bunch of friends and don;t get picked on I just can’t stand my teachers. My friends say they kinda specifically pick on me but I don;t know why. I am usually a minute or two late to school which I know I should really try to be a little ahead of time. The teachers have talked behind my back making the new teachers believe that I’m some bad kid. If I’m so bad why do I have so many friends. I’m only late soemtimes it;s not liek I do drugs or alcohol cause I don’t do any of that a few of my friends do but whatever I don’t I mena I hang out with a lot of clean kids too. The school called my house about being late making my parents angry at me so nwo I’m a go into school at least 10 minutes early but… a teacher actually had the balls to tell me that being late makes me a dishonest and apathetic individual. It;s liek I’m getting paid to go to school when we dion;t even do anything for the first twenty minutes of school anyways. My dad has taken the school’s side well he has never taken my side anyways but idk what to do cause I’m about to lose my head and either get very angry of depressed and I do;t want either, because I used to be very happy and I feel liek I’m losing myself. I’m not goign to go crazy or anything just want to be happier and was wondering what you guys had to say. So I’m not asking for sympathy just some advice on what you guys would do.

February 22, 2008 at 12:45 am
(45) Al says:

I am drinking wine

smoked my last spliff,

well,

couple more glass hash hits,

the feeling is almost there…

almost human…

for a moment, the sexual comfort of another is enough

for a moment

only

almost enough

guess my problem is that the only thing that interests me these days is enlightenment, revolution and crack

and i find crack boring and over rated

rated

8/10

happy to question

happy

sad

confused

human

February 26, 2008 at 11:58 am
(46) rem says:

Tari (22), i understand what you are going thru, i do the same to my wife. I feel like I have a disease. April (32) you should not feel ashamed. You owe it to yourself to relax. Life is tough. If you do not recharge you will feel worse. Ryan (40) I understand your dad and the school, but that teacher was out of line. try hard to ignore those that get you upset. It’s not worth feeling like you do at such a young age.

As for me, the man with all the answers, I want to know why I destroy those next to me when I am angry. Why do i find comfort and strength in such a negative emotion. And why does it hurt to be happy.

March 16, 2011 at 9:30 pm
(47) rinki says:

I read most comments here and it is unlinkely of me to search for “what’s wrong with me?” but I guess we all give in at times and find it awful to always stand up for ourselves. I have been taking loads of shit at work for the last 5 YEARS and though it has made me patient it has also, brought in hopelessnes, depression, stupidity. I sit here reading stories of suffering and sharing and all it brings me is another chapter of negativity. I have no self esteem left and have finally lost myself, it is highly impossible for me to get my confidence and respect back. AS for your question “And why does it hurt to be happy?” I see a bad person trying to be good. BUt the fact is we are what we are! an attempt to change the order will only make you lose yourself which is not a good feeling as you may know. Bad has it’s own value and it must not be ignored or disrespected for you’d lose yourself forever.
An episode changed me entirely and I wish it had never happened. My avatar is a disaster and if being bad is bad then I want to be bad and remain bad. Pls don’t bother when ppl say “oh you are nasty” “you must try to be polite” etc etcetra. know yourself and preserve yourself.

February 28, 2008 at 9:39 pm
(48) john doe says:

i just typed whats wrong with me and it led me here… ive had this depression since i was 15 im now 24 and still cant get my stuff together im on mood stabilizers and psychological therapy only for like 5 months now…any suggestions or opinions? i know given the length of my episode its gonna take some time to feel better but how do i stay patient and positive throughout..??

February 29, 2008 at 4:34 pm
(49) Kyle says:

Man! I typed in :” WHATS WRONG WITH ME?! ” too.

We’re messed up..

March 4, 2008 at 10:14 pm
(50) will says:

I feel the same way it is good to know that I am not the only one. I hate to be this way even though I have a wonderful life, loving friends and a loving family. It’s hard to describe what I feel but atleast some people feel like me

March 8, 2008 at 4:06 pm
(51) catya says:

Me too, what’s wrong with me? I have a list of suggestions… I don’t know what I planned on finding when I typed that in google.

March 9, 2008 at 3:03 pm
(52) MACUP says:

It is horrible….but it makes me feel that I am not alone…..

March 10, 2008 at 3:39 pm
(53) Me says:

Thanks. I tried to say something a few times but can’t. So thanks for being here too.

March 14, 2008 at 2:23 am
(54) Alex says:

This is too scary. My electricity went out and I had nothing to do but sit here and think for about two hours.I thought about how i never sleep. I can go without sleeping for days and not be tired, and at the same time i can sleep for over 14 hours and wake up and feel like i haven’t slept at all. I thought about how I never let people see how messed up I really am. I literally broke four of the bedroom doors in my house in two weeks from being so angry about a month ago. The sad part is that I was angry for no reason. There’s even holes in the walls in my room from me hitting them! I thought I had an anger problem. But I’m also never happy, EVERYONE calls me lazy, and I just really feel like i want to crawl into a hole and lay there until I die.
I took lexapro for a while, but it made me gain weight so I took myself off of it. Then i took effexor for a while and i stopped taking it, too. I hate being medicated. I hate thinking that something is so wrong with me that I have to rely on medication. My ancestors didn’t take this medicine and they lived, so why should I?

So after I sat here in complete silence and complete darkness for a while I realized that there must be other people on this big planet that feel the same as me. And oh my was I blown away after reading this.

Good thing: I know that i’m not alone.
Bad thing: No one seems to know a ‘cure’ for this stupid ‘sickness’ we all have.

p.s.
I typed in “what’s wrong with me” on google, too. haha.

March 17, 2008 at 8:04 pm
(55) Lotz says:

Hi Guys, I found this because i was checking song lyrics. As a matter of interest, I was diagnosed as bipolar at age 16.. i can relate to the misery experienced by so many.
However I have been free of depression for many years… There’s a lot of misery in the world..but a lot more joy. Take hope in the fact that there is a tomorrow and things can change. Sometimes we also need to realise we are not the center of the universe. God is, and we were created to connect with Him and worship Him.. Love to you all. :-) and 1 day at a time

March 21, 2008 at 5:38 pm
(56) dee says:

just wanted to say am completing relating to everything said. have been on anti depressants now for 8 months and generally feeling better if better means not wanting to cry all the time as i wanted to before and seeing the world as a grey place to be, feeling like theres nothing to look forward to. but im clearly on this page for a reason, also googled and came here because having a bad moment. was crying again today like before and didnt know why, and also think whats wrong with me?? hate feeling like this. feel like noone can really understand what im feeling even if i try explaining and makes me all the more frustrated and makes me think the problem truly is with me. sonia, really felt what you were saying, made me compelled to say how i feel and also feel some release here and want to thank you.
hope everyone else finds there way out of what feels like this black hole at times to me. am trying hard but when have relapses like today feels like im back at square one.
trying to stay positive and hope all out there reading this can also be too

March 24, 2008 at 1:21 am
(57) Mom and student says:

Are there answers? I’ve been taught that this life is to learn about good and bad. I try to remember that this will pass — it’s hard and this website has helped me. I think it can be as simple as taking care of yourself — often I am just TIRED — physically tired, needing a hug, a hot bath, read something funny, dessert, a friend to talk to is what usually helps me. Sometimes it is understanding how to work around that life is not fair for anybody and that is the challenge we need to figure out how to move beyond past grivances — I still have not figured this out but I was taught to give it over to God, or imagine a balloon floating and taking it away and get rid of burdens and find what it is you need such as sleep, creative outlet, hard work, a goal to pursue, someone/something to be responsible to or for. Serving those close to you because they need it too.

March 26, 2008 at 12:46 am
(58) Dasein says:

Hey another one googled “What is wrong with me?”

It’s not the idea of being “the center of the universe” as Lotz would have it seem. In fact, it is that kind of comment that often pushes someone further into depression.

I’m 21 and can’t remember ever feeling truly satisfied with my existence, I am not bipolar as I do not experience any extreme highs. I’ve always been a morose character and have been told time and time again to “let it go”, “you’re too sensitive”, “just give it all to God”, “pray”, “smile”, “lift up your head when you walk”, “you need to get out some more”, “have faith”….and a heap of wasted words that have been little encouragement.

Every day is a struggle and yet we struggle on with the remaining bit of hope left inside. It’s good to know that we do not suffer alone.

>

March 30, 2008 at 7:41 pm
(59) andy says:

I typed in “what is wrong with me?” too, was hoping for an answer and a cure. I can’t find one. I find everything too hard sometimes.

March 30, 2008 at 10:42 pm
(60) Sydney says:

AHHH i can’t believe it. hahah
this fits me perfectly.
as i’m reading all your comments, i’m realizing that since i’m still so young, i should try to fix this. Because i can’t live like this, with this everlasting anxiety, i’m not happy with the way i am, my mind is like a freaking puzzle that i can’t figure out. i need helppppp !! before it’s too late and it screws up my life.

March 31, 2008 at 1:12 am
(61) MrHyde says:

that is so me accept for my boys tho I am not loved

at least i now know i am not alone

thank you

March 31, 2008 at 9:35 am
(62) Rebecca says:

Wow. Every word here hits home. I have a good life and family who love me and friends who adore me but I’m still sad. Someone wrote in a comment here that it hurts to be happy.

That is so true for me as well. I cry and hurt when I’m feeling sad and down but if you can believe this..I cry and hurt 100 times more at happy ocassions. Including my sisters wedding.

I let everyone believe I was crying tears of joy but I most definitely was hurting inside.

March 31, 2008 at 1:49 pm
(63) Branden says:

I hate having to go to see a doctor about this… it just adds another bill to my life. Medications cost insane amounts of money and if you have to go off of them there are withdrawls! Thanks for listening.
by the way… google “what is wrong with me”

April 1, 2008 at 7:38 pm
(64) Ryan says:

Well everything said here has put a smile on my face, it makes me feel better that I’m not the only out there especially rem(44) for the advice i just wish my dad would take my side for once but I ahve six more weeks of school and then I’m gone !!thank god!! and Branden(60) I agree I had a doctor when I was younger and this chat helped a lot more than a doctor so I;m just goign to consider that I you guys want to chime in weekly that we can turn this into a little session and really try to help each other out

April 3, 2008 at 2:49 am
(65) NIRVANA_isolate says:

I have just gotten out of rehab,i was their 11 months and have been out for 4 months now. I thought i would have no prob going back to skool and catching up with my friends and i everything would be back to normal. But thats not what happened. i dont care that my friend use cuz i still want to and have with them. infact i smoked 2 or 3 months straight one i got back. Anyway since ive been home my depression, anxiety, and ADD have been in full throttle. And i keep falling, i isolate and have a huge fear of social anxeity which grows by the day. I never had social problems before but now i cant take a step in any direction to help myself. I hangout with my old friends rarely, im seeing a therapist which i feel is my only hope to move forward. I just need a friend who understands my alienation. i feel like im the only one so more and more often i dont see the point on living this pathetic life. Im a NIRVANA fan and can relate to kurt in may aspects. And i feel that if i had friend like kurt had which was Krist Noveselic the bassist i could gain cofidense on get out. Kurts insecurities were lightened becuz he had his best friend their to give him confidence to form a band. I just want a friend as alienated from this world as me. My house doesnt feel like home and i dont no if i will ever find a home on this earth. Sorry if thats was confusing but with my ADD i have a hard time getting things out the way i want. Their plenty more things i could go on and on about but id just jump around thoughts without finishing many of them. I no their are others like me but i feel like im the only one. I often feel like this qoute or little poem i wrote awhile ago, “It pains me to see a day end because it pains me to see a new day begin” that probly saddens people which i think i do all to much. so id just like to hear from kids my age if they have the same thoughts.

April 3, 2008 at 3:29 am
(66) NIRVANA_isolate says:

I really like what Dasien(55) said because im also not bi polar cause i never get any highs my high is some peoples low. But ive also been told those same thing a billion times but to no avail. And its sad that this beautiful disguise we call earth, some call home that so many of use struggle to keep the hope of having hope. And someone said it but i dont no who but why does it hurt to be happy? in some situaions i describe it as coming out of the comfurtable numb depression and that in between stage and above is not so comfortable, infact it physical hurts so id rather stay numb.

April 4, 2008 at 9:08 pm
(67) Sophia says:

Like pretty much everyone who’s commented, I googled “What is wrong with me?” and found this thread. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I really don’t. Most things in my life are going pretty well, and yet I can’t stop feeling depressed most of the time. I can’t stop bogging down on how horrible I feel, and then I feel horrible for feeling horrible when most people have it so much worse. I can’t explain how I feel to my friends and my family, and I only feel like an annoying burden on them when I try.
It’s my birthday today and I came home and cried for no apparent reason. What on earth is wrong with me?

All I can say to you, Kaladej, is that you are certainly not alone.

April 5, 2008 at 1:59 am
(68) NIRVANA_isolate says:

Sophia(64) I truely understand how u feel. I cant explain to my friends or parents what is wrong with me and like you said, when I try I feel like im a burden in their life and I only do more harm than good. I havnt experienced my birthday sober besides in rehab but I dont no what im going to do when I turn 17 in a couple of months all I imagin happenin is me feeling horrbile and breaking down. And when you say “most people have it so much worse” that could be true but your feelings are real and their liggitament , I struggled with the same thing and am getting better but I used to think my problems arent as bad as theirs so i shouldnt feel this way but thats not true. Your problems are different than someone elses and as someone today told me, their is someone else whos gone through almost the exact thing, they may not be someone you no but their out their. So when your problems are differnt from someone elses or seem not as big of a deal as someone elses just try to remember your your own person and you feel the pain just like the other person. I no i feel like the only one who feels like this and you may to, so try to find friends who understand you and can relate because its alot easier talking to someone whos like you rather than someone like your parents or certaint friends who dont understand you and look at you like an alien. Thats just what my parents do.

April 6, 2008 at 3:06 pm
(69) Brandon says:

I don’t know what is wrong with me… I am so insecure and I have plenty of friends and really close friends but I feel left out even though I’m really not…. I am totally insecure and paranoid about friends. It’s like I always have to be with certain friends and I always try to get reassurance about our friendship and if they hang out with somebody else for just a little while I get all paranoid that they are gonna start hanging out with them and not me and I think to myself “She must like him more than me.” She is my best friend… I don’t think that she is any more than a friend to me but I don’t know… Ugh…. I don’t know myself…

April 6, 2008 at 3:11 pm
(70) Brandon says:

I guess I am very insecure and paranoid because I have been hurt so many times. And all these times I was led on and assured it would be ok, but then it really wasn’t ok. I just don’t know anymore. I open up too easily and then get screwed over and hurt. I don’t know what is wrong with me. I feel like I need all the attention and just i dont know. ugh….

April 12, 2008 at 2:47 pm
(71) Dasein says:

Making this a forum sounds like a good idea. A cathartic zone.

Some days…most days i want to crawl into a little hole, get into fetal position and just die. Today is one of those days.

Every day is a struggle and yet we struggle on with the remaining bit of hope left inside. It’s good to know that we do not suffer alone.

April 12, 2008 at 8:54 pm
(72) ali says:

I feel this way. I have been in a loveless relationship because i was tired of being hurt. He’s a great guy but I just can’t seem to love him the way I should. Will I always be depressed despite eating/sleeping/exercising all in correct proportions?
I don’t want to feel so lost all of the time.

April 13, 2008 at 5:30 pm
(73) Solow says:

I feel empty, alone, worthless and like living takes far more energy than I can give. I feel totally disconnected to everything and everyone around me and don’t know how to get out of this rut I’m stuck in.
I’m 28, healthy and have people who love me. It means nothing to me and I feel utterly guilty for that.
I’m on prozac and seeking councelling. What else can I do? Help

May 7, 2008 at 6:23 am
(74) adam says:

I’m 20. Although I am aware there are others out there feeling just like me it gives me little comfort. I feel worthless, and a number of other things, but to sum it up, I feel like a waste of food, living space, and my parent’s money.

I wish I was never born, and I hope there is no heaven or God. I never asked to be alive. For some people life is an amazing gift, and for others it is a complicated curse.
I want life to come to an end in the universe
along with me.

The only thing keeping me alive are my emotional ties to family members, and my instincts. I think of suicide a lot, but I could never do it. I wish I could though, that would straighten this big mess out.

May 8, 2008 at 9:31 am
(75) Given Up says:

I typed “What is wrong with me” into a search engine and got here. Odd seeing how many people found their way to here the same way.

May 9, 2008 at 5:27 am
(76) Alba says:

AHHHHH!!!! I knew it!!! This is crazy!

May 12, 2008 at 1:50 am
(77) kim says:

I understand Tari and everyone elses comments.”WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME” I feel like this should be one of the happiest times of my life and im not happy. I fear the future and tired of be alone. Then at times when I am happy I say to myself it will not last long. I too am a christian but at times I feel like GOD does not hear me. I also feel like everyone does not like but the truth of the matter is I do not like myself. MAY WE GET THE HELP WE NEED!

May 12, 2008 at 3:28 am
(78) kim says:

I soooooooooo understand Brandon (66). I feel like people that I meet are not really my friends and I want so much for people to like me. I have this one good friend every since the 7th grade and I fear losing her friendship and if she be friends other people if feel that I will soon be left behind. I often feel people do not get me or understand me. Better yet I just don’t understand myself!I am tired of the yoyo emotions one mintue I am okay and the next I feel so out of wack. I shy away from people and conversation because I do not want people to really know how boring or stupid I maybe. How I feel about myself shows. I just want to be fixed!!!!

May 13, 2008 at 3:02 am
(79) Far says:

Same thing..I typed in “What’s wrong with me?” and came to this post. Well, actually I already know I have depression. It’s on and off. Sometimes I get confuse on who I really am as a happy person. I am on antidepressant but I still feel emotionless. I can’t remember how to open my heart to people around me which makes me feel aweful. Maybe I need to change a new atmostphere.

May 13, 2008 at 7:01 pm
(80) Marc says:

PLEASE, SOMEONE, ANYONE TAKE THE TIME TO READ THIS. I AM NEEDING HELP.. DESPERATLY.

I did exactly the same.
I also feel exactly the same.
I’m not sure if I have behaviour problems, stress problems or depressed..
I am 15 years old, I also argue and fight with my mum and dad, & I always get into trouble at school.
I feel as if I am doing nothing wrong.

For the last couple of days, my mum has completly blanked me and I no longer feel loved. Not only that, I no longer feel I should be here as I can not find what there is to live for.

I used to be a nice, obedient kid, and all of a sudden I have changed.
I dont know what to do and I am quickly running out of patience.

Just tonight I was really fighting with my dad for getting into trouble during one of my standard grade exams at school.

It all started because I had taken off my school tie and I ended up arguing with one of the senior teachers in the school. She is a really in-your-face type of teacher and I felt like hitting her when she annoyed me. I proved her wrong and then she started on the way I talk. Because I sometimes talk slang.
Anyway, she gave me a punishment exercise and told me, if I didn’t hand it in tommorow,(I am on study leave) I am not getting into the school to sit my next exam. I then told her I wouldn’t be handing it in as its study leave, and she said fine by her.
She foned home and got through to the answering machine as my dad works night shift. She left a message and foned my mums place of work. Where she also got through to the answering machine.
She left a message urging my mum to contact her regarding the situation.
Tonight, after fighting with my dad – when I didn’t think I could feel any lower – she walked into my room to put wet clothes over the radiator and said, “just to let you know I told the teacher I no longer have control over you(me) so I could not make you hand it in(punishment exercise).
Another thing, when I get into trouble in school, I always expect my parents to take my side, or even listen to my side. This never happens and they just go along with what the teacher says.
It is always me who gets the blame for everything. Along with this, my dad is making me feel even more guilty by saying, working nightshift this stress is the last thing he needs. And, he doesn’t know what he did to deserve me.
He has physically thrown he out of the house atleast 3 times.
Tonight he told me to pack my bags and get to fuc*. He must have no idea how degrading this is and I feel their is only one way out.
I could never/ can not bring myself to speak to someone – or even phone childline. I would feel weird if I did.
I fear one day, I will just snap and either do myself, or someone else some damage.
Even my neighbours, the ones who used to take me across the road to the ice cream van no longer take notice of me.
Most of them are pensioners or are nearing it. I think they think I am a NED (chav) because I am a teenager. I don’t even give them cause to believe this as I never wear tracksuits or caps.
I am no longer close to the family who live beside me, the family who used to take me out for the day when I was younger. I can’t bring myself to talk to any of my friends, as none of them I would consider as “best friends” or I could refer to them, or trust and confide in them.
I only met them 4 years ago after I went to a different high school from everyone else in my primary school. I went to one in a different region which my parents chose. I was distraught at this decision, I felt it was the end of the world. Still they didn’t care.

This is the only way I feel I can open up. I KNOW there is something wrong with me but don’t know what.
I really need help and I can only confide in the internet.
I just want my parents to look at themselves and stop always putting the blame on me.

Even during my exams, which are said to be the most important days of my life, I can not think straight or get a clear head – from the argument which ended up as a fight the night before.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE help me.

I know I am not alone here. But I feel like I am. I am crying out for help from my mum and dad, I wish I could just rewind myself and see where it all went wrong and prevent it.
After all, nothing major has happened to my life. I really need help.

Once, before, I even wrote a suicide note, not for attention, but to try to let my “mum and dad” know how I felt.
They just laughed at the thought, saying I don’t have the guts to do it.
Almost tempting me.
I know what would happen though if I did do it. My mum and dad would not take the blame they would blame it on me and turn it around as if I was the bad person.

I just want to know how I can talk about this once and for all with them.
I am not spoilt or attention seeking.
They claim I am spoilt though.
Spoilt, to me is getting everything bought for you, and just being lazy.
I used to be very active and I always buy my own clothes and trainers.
I can not remember the last time they bought me any of these.

I only used to be able to compare myself to my oldest cousin, who I looked up to.
At the weekend I missed my cousins childs christening as I could not bring myself to go. I did not want or I did not feel up to taking the brunt of the embaressment of them shouting at me for nothing in front of people.
When they came home, they told me, everyone was talking about me at the after-party. I dont know if they are making that bit up.
My mum also used to take the time to wake me up in the mornings, now she doesn’t even shout on me, and in the morning I can not bring myself to get up from bed. At night, I do not go to bed. On a typical school night I stay up to about 1.30-2.00AM. I wake up around 8.30 and school starts at 9.00. I stay about 40 mins away from school. Plus I have to walk.
I used to get late letters in every single day through the post.
If only the school realised the complications the were causing on my “life”.

I THANK ANYONE VERY MUCH WHO HAS READ THIS AS I JUST HAD TO GET IT OUT OF MY SYSTEM. I HAVE NEVER TOLD ANYONE BEFORE OF THIS.
ONCE AGAIN I CAN ONLY THANK YOU LOT VERY MUCH. AS IT IS THIS SORT OF THING THAT KEEPS ME GOING.

PLEASE, ANYONE WHO CAN HELP ME OR HAS THE SAME PROBLEMS, OR ANY TIPS, ADVICE OR ANYTHING. LEAVE YOUR E-MAIL ADRESS. I WILL CHECK THIS AGAIN TOMORROW AND IF ANYONE HAS REPLIED I WILL EMAIL U THANKING YOU VERY MUCH. I WOULD ALSO ASK FOR ADVICE.
I FEEL ALIEN, AS IF AM NOT HERE. OR I AM A SKAPEGOAT FOR PEOPLES WRONG DOING.
OTHERWISE, I FEEL INVISIBLE.
THANKS V.V.V.V.V.V.V.V.V.V.V.V.V.MUCH.
MARC =(

May 14, 2008 at 11:35 am
(81) Jules says:

I just typed “what is wrong with me?” in google and found all of you who had done the same thing before me. It’s nice to feel like you’re not alone, there must be lots more of us out there! Here’s a big smile and hug to all of you…

May 14, 2008 at 11:48 am
(82) EricaHOST says:

This is for Marc and anyone else who feels alone.

You’re not.

We have a large and thriving community of people with bipolar disorder supporting each other through this site.

We have forums (bulletin boards):

http://forums.about.com/ab-bipolar

And live chat rooms:

http://www.stepchat.com/bipolar

It takes free (separate) memberships to join our communities, and there is always someone on line to listen to you.

Or you may even take some comfort just from reading. I know I have.

Hope to see you in our forums or chat rooms.

Best regards,
EricaHOST
Community Coordinator
http://bipolar.about.com

May 14, 2008 at 2:11 pm
(83) bipolar says:

Marc, since you feel more comfortable telling people online how you feel, join our community and find out just how NOT alone you can be. Everyone who has posted comments to this blog is welcome. Click the “Discuss in our forum” link at the top left of this page and find online support, or use the links Erica provided above.

WE care.

Marcia
About.com Co-Guide to Bipolar Disorder

May 16, 2008 at 12:04 am
(84) Amanda Byers says:

I was sitting here thinking to myself, what is wrong with me, I can’t even explain how I feel at this moment. In fact I first typed in http://www.iamsuchaloser.com, nothing came up. The I Google what’s wrong with me and that is exactly how I feel and what you’ve said is so so perfect!! About 3 months ago I found I have Bipolar Disorder, it’s been tough cause first off nobody wants to believe I have it and second nobody understands me or how I feel.

May 17, 2008 at 5:24 pm
(85) Daniel says:

LIVING LIFE OUTSIDE THE BOX

I feel like I am going crazy. I think about everything. Life. Death. The nature of existence. I can’t stop thinking. I think about thinking.

I’m always tired.

I always feel like i’m dreaming. Like this isn’t REAL. I question reality. Like maybe none of this is real! (I don’t do drugs!)

I’m always in a daze.

I can talk to anyone one on one. But can’t talk in front of groups of people.

I’m scared to voice my opinion.

Feel like nobody respects me. Like everyone talks about me and laughs at me behind my back.

I’m scared of dying.

I get paranoid about different illnesses. Cancer. Brain tumors in particular.

I feel like i’m living life OUTSIDE THE BOX. Like i’m an observer of life. Like that’s my place in this so called universe. And because I know it, I can never be normal. Never be one of the primitives.

Like I have a heightened sense of sentience. Of self-awareness.

I don’t know whether to think i’m a genius or a madman.

Gifted. Or a freak.

May 17, 2008 at 10:51 pm
(86) cheryl says:

Wow. so many of us typing in “what’s wrong with me” out of pure frustration. All the things my family LOVE about me – will you remind me, will you take care of this,what do I do with this?, are the very same things they hate me for – I can do it myself, you don’t need to remind me 50 times, quit bugging me to get this done. I scream in my head – I DON’T GET IT!!! I know in this community I am not alone but in my own life, my own family I am. The meds just make me feel like I’m in an acceptable “skin” a kind of “Stepford Wife” to society. Or if they make me balanced I hate the weight I gain and my husband asks me why I don’t care about sex.
DO WE REALLY HAVE TO CHOOSE BETWEEN BALANCE AND ALL OF THAT???
Right now I am weighing whether I want to take the stronger meds and say good bye to a part of me. Or to move out until the stresses in our life go away. I am so sad.

I thank God that suicide does not come up in my mind. I have two teenage boys who are my golden threads that tie me to this world and I know that suicide is a one way ticket to an eternity of wandering lost. My beliefs but it somehow keeps me safe when in the past I did not have this “life jacket” in my mind.
Well I’ve taken enough of this chat. I may or may not be bipolar so hope I am not intruding.
Add me to the community of ‘you are not alone’ I send energy and love to all of you out there. I hope we can all find peace.

May 20, 2008 at 8:09 pm
(87) Dasein says:

*hugs to ya Marc* chin up man, sometimes the sky is blue and that is enough :) .

Julie asked, “How many people including children are dead because of some one with some sort of bipolar disorder?”

This may just be my view, but i think it’s more a matter of why that person did what they did. Again, it’s because of comments like “if you need a tablet to keep your brain in your head why are you allowed to walk around people….” that keep us hurting. I’m not saying that people shouldn’t be allowed to voice their opinions but insensitivity is not just a word put in the dictionary for show. Perhaps many of us are just “too sensitive” (i’ve heard that too many times to count) and perhaps some of us do need to be put away…sometimes i wonder if i wouldn’t be better off away. However, if (always if :( ) at least one person would truly listen there would be a better chance of us not feeling so alone. Right…this is the perfect example.

May 25, 2008 at 11:30 pm
(88) Colleen says:

I, too, typed in “What is wrong with me” and got here.

I’m trying to get over my best friend that just isn’t ready for a relationship right now. I’m acting like I’m okay with it – and all my friends think I am. But really, I’m so sad and disappointed. I just want to curl up and not wake up for a long time.

May 26, 2008 at 9:45 pm
(89) Monique says:

I also got here when i typed ”what is wrong with me” on google… I’ve read all the comments with tears in my eyes.. All my life i’ve had my ups and downs (i’m 23) but as i get older my downs are taking the upper hand.. I have been diagnosed with clinical depression and taking Symbalta for 3 weeks now, i didn’t want to take chemicals at first because i believed that i was born like this for a reason, but now i feel i don’t have another choice, so i’m giving it a try.. Also stopped smoking weed when i started Symbalta. I’m hanging in there, but i still wanna hide myself from the world… ”I feel like i’m missing a major part of my soul. I see this life just outside my reach, a life I want, but I’m trapped behind this glass wall. Songs make me cry, thoughtful movies drag me into strange whirls of thought”.. Laura25 I feel the same way! I want to break myself out, but something (and i don’t know what the hell it is) is holding it in.. Like the ‘real’ me is trapped.. It’s so hard to explain it……

May 29, 2008 at 7:20 am
(90) shaun turpin says:

Hey Marc, Hope your OK , you sound like a great kid , Don’t let the Bastards get you down.

June 4, 2008 at 8:53 am
(91) sadboy says:

I don’t know what’s wrong with me? My family loves me but i still look for more. I have people around me but still feel alone. I smile but no one smiles back at me. I shout, yet there is no response. I laugh most of the times but still cry alone.

June 4, 2008 at 8:03 pm
(92) willow says:

i have fun then get into a big fight. then my friends act like its nothing. i can never get sleep.

June 5, 2008 at 4:16 pm
(93) Ryan says:

Sigh. So many of us with the same problems. And yet, no answers. I don’t want to go on anti-deps, but i don’t see any other solution. I do find comfort in the fact that there are so man of us out there. However, thats not enough.

Good luck everyone.

-Ry

June 6, 2008 at 2:15 pm
(94) Katie says:

My thoughts and prayers are with Marc and everyone who feels badly on here. I am a counselor myself and I feel this way too sometimes. My biggest problem is I try so desperately to make others happy, I have no idea how to make myself happy anymore.

June 7, 2008 at 9:41 pm
(95) Cheryl says:

It may seem desperate at times, but please do not give up. The low times seem impossible but we are all survivors otherwise we would not have been searching for “what is wrong with me?”. We would have given up long ago. Together we can all find the way. Today, I believe that I am strong enough to find the way. Tomorrow when I am not, I will come to this page and find comfort and strength that I am not alone so that I may begin again. My thoughts and good energies go out to all of us. Please know that we CAN do this.

June 8, 2008 at 10:43 am
(96) AJ says:

nothing is really wrong with the “real YOU”… what you talk of, think of, contemplate of, is nothing but utter nonsense that keeps you enslaved…

the mind and its secretion, the thought, reflects itself magnifies itselfs manifests itself through the emotions in you. look out for yourself and observe yourself.

true and infinite liberation is just in your presence always, the only thing is “when will you be ever present” … i feel it must begin from NOW

June 8, 2008 at 2:37 pm
(97) Amy says:

I didn’t type in directly “what is wrong with me”. But….I’ve been feeling very suicidal but the place is a mess and I was just on paranormal.com and totally believe in ghosts and that suicide does NOT end the “what’s wrong with me”. So I visualize the suicide and the aftermath and realize how I’d only be hurting me, and the people in my life selfishly and I’d be still there only without a body still whining about how crazy and horrible I feel. I don’t think I’m totally bipolar. Also, thinking a LOT about it doesn’t work very well. Antidepressants and and anti anxiety drugs help somewhat.

One day at a time helps. Seeking help is a loooong road that you have to be really prepared to fight for yourself and willing to give up the comfort pain cocoon of “what’s wrong with me”.

Please do not dismiss being an introvert either. I desperately need time alone to think and recharge. All of life is energy. You have to do what for yourself what positively gives you energy and keeps you in the flow.

I do feel bipolar about this! I have been told all my life that staying away from others, sleeping a lot, just thinking things through is BAD. Must go out with other people and DO DO DO.

It’s about finding my happy balance. People that give me energy back. Little tiny steps that help.

Books that help have been Eckhart Tolles The Power of Now and I think these feelings are our “painbodies” (ego?) that feed off pain and parasitically live within us.

I’m trying to stop binge eating right now and medicating myself with marijuana to alleviate the feeling of “what is wrong with me”.

A very very good book (so why am I not living it now?…hmmm that in itself is a good question to ask: What do I get out of these episodes of “WWWM?”) is Peggy McColl’s Your Destiny Switch. These people (Eckhart Tolle too) self sabotaged their lives with what I call WWWM? Vicious cycle. Oh yes, and I’m reading Byron Katie’s Loving What Is (she went through near self annihilation too!)

Except all this digging is almost stirring up severe WWWM rebound!

Could this be that I simply am an introvert that not standing true to what she needs in order to function properly?

And what about all the “what you think about attracts” ????

Try reverse psychology and just sit with the crappy feeling for as long as it wants to stay. When I shift my thinking that I’m just being aware of my emotions and just observe that without trying to assimilate them into “wwwm”!

Most important is to NOT go into “what do other people think of me”. You can’t win here cuz only YOU have the secret key to your own self. And you’ll be tossed back and forth til your exhausted.

Better to get as simple as possible and try to lean on positive as best as you can. The boring things necessary. Sleep, proper nutrition, yes, damned exercise (so what if your exercise is stretching and that’s it)…feel your body and connect your Mind Body

Here’s some PoZ thinking and well wishing love sent out everyone’s way.

There is no ONE right answer (when I’m most going insane for some reason this calms me)

Namaste

June 12, 2008 at 8:32 pm
(98) Marc says:

Hi everyone, Marc here!

Feeling alot, alot better now, thanks very much to everyone for their support it sure helped me and best of luck to everyone else.
I think I was just going through a faze of depression.

Thanks again everyone!!!

Marc x

June 12, 2008 at 8:34 pm
(99) Marc says:

Me again, I’d just like to say that, I have now left school officially, I have myself a part time job and an interview for college and I am getting on great with my family now,

I hope this is an inspiration to anyone else and may god be with you.

Thanks for listening to me,

Marc.

June 17, 2008 at 2:07 pm
(100) Saywhat says:

Hello, I’ve been doing some research on the link between REM phase of sleep and the depression spectrum (i.e. all associated issues such as anxiety, I started this research because I was reading a book about Neuroscience and a passing comment in the book made me think there could possibly be a link. It turns out there is, I found a website and I read the 1st paragraph and at the end of the 1st para it said…This makes them worry even more as they feel that, “something is wrong with me”. And that reminded me of when I’d typed in “what is wrong with me” and found this website, (I wrote my 1st post under the name Andy because i want to stay anonomous) so i thought I’d post a link here, it might help you http://www.hgi.org.uk/archive/Depression.htm.

I’d also like to say futher that i attribute my depression to smoking canabis, and interestingly, canabis is shown to affect REM sleep- so if you smoked a lot for a long time, that maybe the reason, and finding a way to reverse the influence on REM sleep maybe the answer to drug-related depression. This obviously is just conjecture on my part, but i think it’s an interesting avenue for scientists to explore- if anyone knows of any research in this area can they post a reply to this post?

Don’t get me wrong, I fully understand that many people take drugs and are not adversely affected, but i also know, from experience that a significant minority of drug-users do develop mental issues such as depression. I also think that drugs made me a deeper thinker, made me more insightful and slightly more intelligent, (see the comedian Bill Hicks on his stories about LSD- “the door is a jar”- lol)

June 17, 2008 at 2:39 pm
(101) saywhat says:

Me again, I’d also like to add, in reference to an above post about hating relying medication to ease depression and how did our ancestors deal with it. I’d like to draw your attention to a book written in the 16th century by St John called “The Dark Night of the Soul”.

It’s about a journey of self-realisation, a journey to a deep understanding of the self and it’s relationship to life, the beginnings of the journey are of destruction of a persons self-perception, their soul, which at the start is rooted in ignorance and selfishness (I think if you suffer from depression you are probably more sensitive to other peoples ignorance and this makes you sad, i believe that is the start of your journey to a more compassionate and ultimatley happy- a very spiritual happy- person), this destruction shakes your foundations to the core and is very frightening and lonely and alienating (hence the phrase ‘dark night of the soul’).

St John describes it in a way that reminds me of snakes and ladders, depression is a journey to a new self, with unshakeable foundations, its like the self as synonomous with the Pheonix, rising from the ashes, depression burns you to your soul but out of the ashes something more beautiful is realised and I think this rebirth is beginning of a very deep appreciation and wonder about life, like the enlightment of the soul- maybe you sometimes, in your hours of despair feel, something beautiful stirring deep inside? A fire burning? A beautiful diamond soul? Light? The dawning of a new day? Hope!!! I’d also like to quote by Nietzsche “he must have choas within him, who would give birth to a dancing star”.

I definately have glimpses of something wonderful and pure in my soul, and i feel that I am privailaged to catch these glimpses, and i feel that it is only the depressed who can see it? Does that make sense, I’d like to know what people think. I think the darkness is the beginning of a true appreciation of the light- a neccessary/painful part of a journey to a true love.

I also want to warn you that “the dark night of the soul” is sometimes seen as a religious text, but i don’t think you have to beleive in God to understand, and I, in no way am preaching any kind of religion in what i’m saying here.

June 17, 2008 at 2:46 pm
(102) saywhat says:

I forgot my point on last post; anyway our ancestors treated depression as a journey to spiritual enlightment.

June 18, 2008 at 10:53 am
(103) carmen says:

wow i thought i was alone but got toknow im not i do feel as there is something mayor wrong with me but then the next minute im fin i hate this sometimes i think hmmm how is tomorrow gonna oh no am i gonna feel the same as today ect am i gonna die i really hate this strange it came from out of no where !!!!

July 7, 2008 at 10:20 pm
(104) Confused says:

I am so glad that I am not alone. It’s sad that there are so many people feeling how I feel, but at least it’s common. What I don’t understand is how it is so common yet what is out there to help us? I’m on medication but have not seen a therapist. Has anyone gotten full relief from seeing a therapist?

I’d be willing to do anything in my power to help myself…I can’t simply “get over it” and that makes me really frustrated.

July 9, 2008 at 2:21 am
(105) Awnika says:

Have I ceased to exist? I read something tonight that has caused me to ask myself this question. Here is a small passage: Life Without Meaning is to Cease to Exist — When a person loses their purpose in life, they lose all sense of meaning, just seeming to drift along with no harmony in their world nor any particular destination in mind. Life without meaning is like a bottomless abyss. If there is no rhyme or reason to what a person is doing in their existence, then why are they here, what was the initial goal to begin with?……And so I ask, “have I ceased to exist.”

July 12, 2008 at 12:13 am
(106) Travis says:

Well, like all of you, I also typed in “What is wrong with me” and ended up here. Im 19, living in Southeast, KY… for the past 2 years ive experienced my ups and downs. Some days I just wanna blow my freaking brains out, or lay around and do nothing. Other days… Im somewhat happy and I get out to socialize with friends. I had been put on Lexapro for a while, but it was making me want to kill myself more so i stopped taking it. Nothing really seems to excite me or make me happy anymore, even when im feeling somewhat decent, i see all the worlds bullshit and it just brings me down. I THINK…. ALOT…. about some of the craziest shit and i dont know why it just hits me all at once and its like im in a trance and have to snap myself out sometimes. Even when im driving down the road, its like my brain is on autopilot and im just thinking the entire trip. Im an active musician… its about the only thing that keeps me somewhat sane, but of course it doesnt always help. I pretty much just feel like…. BLAH… all the time .

July 14, 2008 at 1:41 pm
(107) paul says:

All are under depression out of which 10% reveal it completely and go to mental zoos; 70% reveal it half and work on average jobs; 15% hide during the day only and become owners/ceos/presidents/managers etc and the balance 5% hide it completely and become rulers and very rich
The world has been like this times immemorial

July 14, 2008 at 7:27 pm
(108) Justus says:

Yep. Got here by typing that magic phrase. Half-heartedly, not really giving a shit. Typing it in, even though it felt inconsequential. I should be looking for a job, because that’s what normal people do when they’re unemployed, but I can’t really find it in myself to write out a f*cking bullsh*t cover letter talking about how much I know about your f*cking company, how much I’d like to work for said piece of sh*t company and what a great f*cking asset I’d be to your team.

Let’s see. I’m 23, almost 24. Out of college but unemployed, bitter and jaded, lifeless, energy-less, not suicidal but very very very very very very very depressed. I have a hard time finding the motivation to get up in the morning. I have a hard time finding the motivation to go to sleep at night. In both cases I cast my mind back to the past and I wonder what the hell went wrong. “What the fuck did I do?” I scream it silently in my head between tears into a pillow, or over a cup of water. Can’t find the desire to eat anything. Can’t find the desire to say hi to anybody, to call old friends, much less get laid, even though society says that all warm blooded men should basically be hairy, walking, talking penises. Big mongrels who walk around and say “Gotta f*ck. Gotta f*ck. Ughachunka oogachunka.”

This is great though. The world needs fewer places that require sign-ups and registration for people to say something and get it off their chest. I saw a post above from the moderator/host of this place and I realized that showing a link to a bunch of depressed, bipolar, maybe even suicidal people isn’t going to help them, since some of them are going to have a hard time even summoning up the motivation to click the link and sign up and type a bunch of meaningless words to a cold, lifeless world filled with people who care mostly about themselves and the people who make them feel good about themselves and only half care about everyone else, if even that much.

So how about this. Why don’t the people at bipolar.about.com team up with the myriad of other non-profits out there that claim to give a sh*t about we people who hate and love ourselves intensely but can’t summon the energy to do anything about anything and why don’t all of you design a website that doesn’t require registration and avatar creation. A website that doesn’t glorify itself or the f*cking organization that runs it. Why don’t you guys set a new paradigm and create a website that is frank. No formal bullsh*t about what your organization does. Put that somewhere else for the people who give you your funding. Let people type in “what is wrong with me” or “10 best ways to kill yourself” and let them click on something which doesn’t point them to a thousand garbled ads. Something simple, without clutter, organized, easy to use, and most of all, down to earth. Because, I’m sorry, but the way everyone is going about everything in this world is 9/10 times just f*cking useless.

July 18, 2008 at 12:35 pm
(109) Leah says:

My life is the best it’s been. I have a job that pays more than I have made in my life before. It has awesome benefits that started the first day I worked . I bought my first car… and then my office moved within walking distance of my apartment. I live with my boyfriend and we are very much in love. The wheather this summer has been wonderful in my area. I am losing weight after starting an exercise program and I did very well at work last month.

So why am I miserable? I have spent the last two weeks avoiding doing any real work at work and instead spend most of the day reading webcomics, feeling depressed for no known reason, and calling fax machines and offices i know are closed to cover for the fact I am not talking to people like I am supposed to.
All of which is counter productive and will make my misery at work worse… I know this.. yet I am having a really hard time calling people. And thinking about it, this is not the first time I have been miserable at a job… I’ve been miserable at all of them, no matter the type. I feel like something is very wrong with me to be so miserable when I am in job I know many people would love to have. I know my family has a history of bi-polar.. but I really don’t want to go on meds.

July 19, 2008 at 1:32 am
(110) help says:

i DONT KNOW WHATS WRONG, BUT KNOW i AM 45 AND NOWHERE AND HAVE A 11 AND 3 YEAR OLD STILL IN THE HOME, i THOUGHT IT MAY BE BPD, DONT HAVE THE TIME FOR DR.S TO DECIDE,, i NEED ANSWERS NOW, DONT WANT TO PASS THIS ON TO MY LAST FUTURE GENERATION… AS I HAVE A 24 AND 22 WHOM i KNOW HAVE PROBLEMS,, BUT DIDNT REALIZE IN MY 20-S THAT I COULD BE PASSING IT ON TO THEM,, IT REALLY SUX TO THINK THAT IT WAS JUST LIFES LOWS AND HIGHS THAT NEVER WENT AWAY… AND THEN YOU ARE AT MIDLIFE AND STILL NOWHERE…. YET YOU WANT TO KNOW YOUR KIDS CAN BE SPARED THIS AGONY, AND REALLY LIVE THEIR LIVES!!!

August 5, 2008 at 2:03 pm
(111) Marilyn says:

Amazing that this has come up–I have had a messy life though happy as a child-single European mother and in a tenament but oh how she tried and had much to struggle with. She was very stern and angry but protective. Her friend asked her why does she sing so much-for what? But I did–got bullied but so what? Regular stuff–years later -that tragic friend of my Mom’s killed herself. And so did my mother’s best friend’s daughter. I felt compassion and sadness but a healthy distance where it is not entrenched in your soul. Many of you are young on here and some really going through some stuff that happens like boyfriend things and loneliness in school. I AM NOT minimalizing it–I know because I was a strange teenager and felt very rejected and battling with Mom and bright but underacheiving because of social anxiety after much messiness in life. Too detailed–the point is–I am much older and amazingly have enjoyed many things but still low self-esteem. So many of you are in very good places and I feel for you because of that beast. I have had a traumatic 7 years up till now and losing my mother years ago after we finally became allied and a wonderful companionship and helping to take care of her–it devastated me and one beloved dog after another. I wanted suicide then but I did not and climbed out and opened my heart again to love and was blessed but unlike most of you–mine is different–there was money then too. 7 months ago I was-even with a gimpy leg and a 7 year financial battle and many changes–I still felt normal. Last October I remember looking at my hibiscus and a weird feeling passed over me for about 30 seconds and I was happily researching and the thought passed. Then in November-a beloved tenant moved out–OK-that was OK. I was then desperate to start moving on insurance. I have loving friends but not a nice husband to lean on and it never bothered me before but no children. Then in February–everything unraveled–just creepy-one change after another and traumas and disappointments –NOW TODAY as in February-that day everything became surreal–cannot enjoy anything–no appetite–very scared about finances–things that never bothered me do now and through my worst times–I have never felt like this. I even tried to send in a donation to St.Francis for my kitty Buster and 3 times it came up as server error. I even called and the sister in Wisconsin says that the server is OK–how creepy is that? Does anyone get creeped out by word associations? NEVER in my life did I even search engine depression and suicide. My estranged brother is bi-polar and has a wonderful family. I feel really alone now. I agonize over the few renaining family members I have left. I am a very compassionate person but just hearing the words crazy or suicide on a movie or reading fill me with a creepiness I have NEVER known-NEVER. I look at a repeat of a favorite show such as Law and Order-CI and seen the episode many times but the words come up and it never bothered me before AT ALL-just compassion but not under my skin. I have unlocked memories that have not been there for years and haunt me–terrible nightmares–every mistake, regret and envy. My own neighborhood does not look real. Even through difficult times i could laugh viscerally–not a fake laugh that I do not feel. Everything is symbolic–the garden which I love so much was not done this year. More creepiness. My little room was such a comfort zone–even my kitty is acting strange. Now it is alien and claustrophobic. The birds are not even singing. Where did they go? I have a deep belief in God and loved the sermons–I could even take the beat up ones but now it is hollow. I feel God has orchestrated this all as punishment but I am a nobody. Ruminating all the time. I even get creeped out changing the pictures of my calendar. How stupid–everything is too personalized-too strange maybe because it is strange. I have strange fulnesses in my head I never had. I cannot even get to help–the economy does not help but if I felt like a normal person again–creative and engaged–it would be better. I do not know what to do but it feels better to write it out. Too many worries and feel as if I cannot get help. Too many external forces. Oh my God–how I want the regular me back. I have taken pain meds for my joints and for years they would make me feel good and my pain much better. They now make my brain feel better—a little so I know there is a seratonin effect but not good like when I was normal. I like healthy food but almost want to punish myself by not eating. NEVER was I this way. Of course after a trauma–appetite is suppressed but I just have never felt this way. Fear,grief,depression–and I believe I have damaged my brain. I always wanted to be the giver and helper–I need to please. Now it is strange. This was too long and still incomplete–I would not blame anybody for not reading it but is there anyone out there who feels this? Does anyone feel surreality of familiar surroundings? For all of you who are in a good place with all the elements of your life–I would dare not say a thing like get over it–I really understand anyway–all those sites with the usual clinical symptoms are not complete–check http://www.wingsofmadness.com and it will be enlightening. My dear Lord–I do not want to commit suicide but I have made too many mistakes. It feels like too many external forces and God has forsaken me and a lot of us. I do not want to believe that. I want to live but where is there hope? Does anyone feel like this? Bless you and I mean it- Bless you all, Marilyn

August 9, 2008 at 9:30 pm
(112) Zen says:

I’m 15 years old and .. and right now I have the feeling somethings wrong with me… T_T
(Beware, this is gonna sound boring and will probably waste your time and you wont understand much cos my English sucks and it’s 3 in the midnight so I’m not making much sense)

I’ve bin doing martial arts (especially Taekwondo) since I was 6, just like many other people have, but I believe I have the style and potential to become big.
I’ve felt this way all my life. Like I need to leave my mark in this world(something like that).
I was ashamed of thinking this way, I never talked to anyone about this EVER and at first when I was younger (7-10 years old) I thought to myself; “don’t all people think they have the potential to become great?”
At about 12 years old I started believing in myself more and more.. and more. Until I realized that just thinking about myself isn’t good inough.. so I started to think about others first (I tried) and now I’m doing pretty good :D
I just opened my own gym for people who want to join me, with my martial arts and tricking.. got 8 friends so far :D

I feel like I’m destined(destinned? o_O) for greatness.

Now 50% of you might think I’m just a retarded kid that thinks he’s better then others.. but I don’t. It’s very hard for me to explain cos I don’t understand it fully myself and because my English sucks..

So i guesse the thing that’s wrong with me is.. that I’m typing this at 3 in the night because I don’t have ANYONE I can talk to about this.. I don’t need to anymore :D I’ve found my answer right now ^^

I think..
I just need to try harder.

Okay typing this just totally helped.. I figured it out..

My time will come soon :3

August 14, 2008 at 5:58 pm
(113) francesca says:

it is no surprise that nearly every one of us here typed “what is wrong with me” into google and came to the same spot, with the same concerns to varying degrees. when you are so at the end of your rope that you type “what is wrong with me” into a search engine, you are reaching out for the answer to a question we have all been asking ourselves for eternity. we landed in a place where we are all having the same conundrum, right at this very moment. it is simple, rare, and amazing.

maybe we need to stop asking ourselves, “what is wrong with me.” maybe we need to start telling ourselves “there is nothing wrong with me.”

look at all of us. we are a formidable army of the dark soul. unfortunately, because of the depression or whatever it is, we can’t even pick up our swords and fight. half the time i wanna help myself and the other half i am afraid of the shallow life of “happy.” i feel lost and out of control, but am even more scared of being “happy” cuz that somehow seems like a tragic loss of the out of control part of me that actually IS me!

one thing i am sure of is that the help we are looking for can only be found inside ourselves. not in a pill bottle given to you by a doctor, although the symptoms might lessen. not in booze, crack, weed, meth, smack, blow, etc. or any combination of those, although the semblance of recreation and/or relaxation is satisfying. not in a piece of advice, although it helps to follow someone’s guidance. not by believing in a god, although it helps to take the focus off of the self. (IN SOME CASES) not in self-mutilation, or cutting, even if it helps to feel SOMETHING. (where my wild, whirling spiral whittles itself down to a tiny hole, spitting me out into a vast sea of absolute chaos. i become blind with rage and so much hatred and frustration. the feeling of the pain and the sight of the blood are an instant rush. because i have voluntarily sent my body into “heal” mode, i feel calm, able to breathe again. i look down at the cut. i see the clumps of hair in my hands. i ask myself “what is wrong with me”)

confessing this makes me see myself in a different light. doing this to myself is no weirder or different than going out for a smoke during the climax of a great big fight with someone you love. i’m in a constant argument with myself that is like a roller coaster and i need to do SOMETHING to get off of it. something that isn’t drugs or alcohol or cutting myself or fantasizing about suicide or coming up with long involved plots about how everything i have ever done EVER was a total mistake.

i find the book recommendations to be a ray of hope, because confronting the question “what is wrong with me” is too overwhelming for me alone to handle. i read everyone’s comments and i hope mine will also be read, because nothing is worse than words falling on deaf ears. i think we can all do something about this. i think we all WANT to do something about this. i think maybe there is a good balance somewhere between negative thoughts and positive thoughts and it doesn’t have to be one or the other. i just need a different way to cope with the feelings inside, and a way that is right for me. and only i am gonna be the one to figure that out. it is so hard. i don’t know where to look, but i have to keep trying. i might not be able to stop the feelings inside of me, and that’s good, cuz i don’t wanna stop feeling what i feel. IT’S RIGHT TO FEEL THIS WAY! I SEE THAT JUST BY READING YOUR STORIES! there are legitimate reasons why we get angry, sad, scared, tired, suicidal… i just need to be okay with feeling the way i do, and then stop those feelings from consuming me somehow.

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH US.

August 19, 2008 at 12:20 pm
(114) chris says:

hey fellas….. thanks for all your postings, specially francesca
suicide aint much of an alternative, its so messy
i just wanna go back to bed

August 21, 2008 at 6:37 pm
(115) cc says:

i feel the same way but where do we go for help and who do we talk to

September 16, 2008 at 5:26 am
(116) siddharth says:

What is wrong with me
with us
I believe only thing that is rong with us is how far we have disrupted the harmony b/w our mind and body
all animals evolve
but we humans started grouping rather than evolving a long time ago
the human community is evolving but we humans .. we have fallen too far

September 16, 2008 at 10:59 am
(117) Morgan says:

I was bored at work and I typed in ” whats wrong with me” and I ended up here. I dont know what is wrong with me? I sometimes can feel happy and want to live life to the fullest with my bf but then sometimes Ill have a week or so when I don’t know what I want and feel all weird and distant from my bf. I know I love him and he is the most amazing boyfriend in the world but when this happens I keep pushing him away and I’m scared that one of these days I am actually going to lose him. I just want to have a weekd where I know everything is good and I feel good and I know what I want again. Can this be considered as Bi-polar syndrome?

September 18, 2008 at 12:06 pm
(118) Devon says:

Looking at this page made me think. Maybe nothing is wrong with us. Look at how many people are on here typing the same thing over and over again. I think everyone has these high up and low downs. Maybe there are just people like us, who dont know how to deal, and there are people who can just get over it. How can so many people feel the same way and it be call depression, or bipolar disorder. Maybe there is something wrong with those other people, who just get over it. Maybe we are better because things effect us on a deeper level. I feel like if I wasnt this way I wouldnt be so creative. My father is bipolar, and the dr’s say I am too. I am nothing like that, what he has is serious, and I feel like the joke. I have been inspired. Reading all of these comments really opened my eyes, I am not alone. I have all of you here with me.

September 19, 2008 at 9:20 am
(119) Lavinya says:

wow crazy i googled whats wrong with me too
i just felt so empty like there was no other words to describe what i felt what i needed to know and what i wanted to find

i know iv had depression for 6 or so years but iv never done anything about it. iv read tons of self help books and i feel good while im reading them and think im going to change every time i turn the page but then as i finish it i completely forget everything and go back to how i was feeling before

im 23 and studying legal studies have been for 5 years now. I have failed every year of my uni studies. I work in retail and face people everyday. its the hardest thing when the thoughts in my head are constantly linking absolutely everything i see before me to a shit feeling

everyones always saying how gorgeous i am but i cant see it how lucky i am to have the things i have but i never feel happy from these material things everydays getting worse

i fell for a guy who broke my heart, he was seeing someone for years and decided not to tell me but to string me along so i looked over any guy who came my way caus i always felt like he was the one for me i have never been in a rlship caus of him

my parents are good people. I live at home but they see everything from a different angle. to them everything with my life is fine. finish the study get a job and then do whatever you like. they have no idea how the way theyv made my home life has made it impossible for me to ever bring home any guy, to have a late night out with the girls, to speak loudly over the phone any and everything id ever want to see. they dont understand the way theyv caged me into a life that suits them.

theres no way for me to go. i cant let go of a degree thats already 5 years in. I cant get a job elsewhere they wld be heartbroken i couldnt do that to them.

everyone around me has gone in and out of relationships, some married but all my girlfriends in happy rlships. Theyre bfs doing things for them buying them things loving them. then theres me who stays at home most weekends caus theyr always busy. im tired of being alone. every guy iv ever been interested in just doesnt feel the same way.

its sucks not being able to change the way shit happens in your life.
sometimes ur truly stuck, alone and empty, bored and have nothing that could lift you up.I have goals and dreams and i look forward to the day. but what about this feeling.. not even thoughts that there will be a better day or time will change everything…can make me feel any better

just feels like theres no way out

September 24, 2008 at 5:42 am
(120) david says:

a beautiful clear blue sky, a morning sunrise, a night full of bright stars, children laughing, kind words from friends, love from family, a smile from a stranger, fun memories of childhood, happy thoughts, we all have those too. whne you can see the good outways the bad. happiness just comes natural. believe in yourself. forget the hurt.smile. we all can type on a computer on the internet. it could be worse. some ppl dont even have food to eat. things get worse before they get better. the best thing is to surround yourself with the people you love.

September 24, 2008 at 6:57 pm
(121) i_will_not_fear says:

Fear is the mind-killer. It is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it gone past me, I will turn to see fear’s path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.
*
What is your fear? (I fear I will never have the wife and kids that I so desperately want.) That fear is a self-fulfilling prophecy: you lose because you fear. If you can let the fear dissolve into the nothing that it is, the thing you want will be in your grasp.

I’m fighting the good fight. I’m close now; I can feel it! Help me by fighting on with me…

October 3, 2008 at 3:12 pm
(122) maithe says:

I feel the same, Always try to find love knowing I’m already loved alot.

October 14, 2008 at 8:56 pm
(123) elpida19 says:

i typed the same thing as all of you.
i knew there are a lot of people feeling like this, i just wasn’t expecting so many people eager to talk about it and share…
i ve been feeling like this since i was a kid, eventhough i didn’t have any major tragedies in my childhood. then at highschool my boyfriend broke up with me and i was so messed up for a long time, i did some stuff i shouldn’t have. now i m over that thing but there is always something haunting me… and i m studying psychology, go figure. i m really into art too, maybe you should try it, it is a lot like this site when it comes to sharing your pain.
but like charles bukowski says…

“there’s no chance at all:
we are all trapped by a singular fate.

nobody ever finds the one

the city dumps fill
the junkyards fill
the madhouses fill
the hospitals fill
the graveyards fill

nothing else fills”

anyway…
my name in greek means “hope” ;)

October 22, 2008 at 1:18 pm
(124) jcash says:

Hey, I managed to be one of the many who found this site by google. I don’t want to just repeat what everyone else has already said, because it seems that whether its us being all “messed up” or having problems dealing with our circumstances; we generally share the same feelings. I can’t stand people that don’t actually understand depression, trying to dictate to someone how they should look up at the beutiful sky and say “it’s a great day, I’m going to choose to be positive today.” Like we choose to be this f-n miserable. We wouldn’t have a problem with feeling this way, if we chose it and could just move on from it. If you get sad one day, because your favorite pet just died or your significant other just left you; I understand being able to feel sad and then one day realizing you need to move on. Depression is different and doesn’t just go away so easily. Not to mention the mania/anger involved with Bi-polar (which includes depression, for the uneducated). I hope we can find something to cure depression.I will comment, that if you can find it in you to exercise and eat healthy, it does positively impact you after a while, but doesn’t seem to be the whole cure. Meds should be used as a means to an end and not the only answer. Meds force your brain to work in specific ways, but as you’ve read or experienced may stop over time or take a physical toll on your body. Seeing a psycologist while on the meds will allow you to think clearly enough to possibly work out the deep inner issues tha you may have and not realize it. It may also allow you to finally talk about all of those things that you’ve had to hold inside, because no one wants to listen to you. I’m not pro medications, but I am definately for results. Good luck and God bless.

October 28, 2008 at 2:25 am
(125) plez help says:

Wow, I can’t even begin to explain how relieved I am to have found this site, who woulda known that so many people typed in the same-o “What is wrong with me?” Nice to know this isn’t all in my head…maybe there really is something wrong with me.
I have so much to be grateful for, but it takes so much energy to be happy. There’s always this dull feeling that lingers even after a joyous event like my graduation. I feel like I need to put up an act to be normal, remind myself to smile, sometimes smile too much. I seem like a happy go-lucky person, good grades, full ride to college, lots of friends, full of life. But I feel worthless, like just another lost soul with no point, a nobody, like there’s no point in living. I don’t like feeling this way.It comes and it goes though. I can recall a couple times I was truly happy, not even pretending. I get depressed often but I cant pinpoint how often. I get happy often too. I am depressed right now. I want help so bad, yet I don’t wanna ask for help, I don’t wanna admit that I need help. When people offer to help me I push it away. Sometimes I sit in my room and just cry and I have no reason why. I keep those tmes to myself because its embarassing to admit you really dont know whats the matter. I find myself deep in thought but I have no idea what I was thinkin about. Sometimes I fathom reasons to be upset just to give myself an excuse or for something to share when i dont know y Im upset. My sleep patterns are way off. Im tired all day but I cant sleep. There are people who care about me, but I dont want them to care; I want them to back off and hate me the way I hate myself -(Or thats what Im saying on the outside..;on the inside Im saying: dont stop caring, please just help me.) It doesn’t work; people quit on me and dont even know they were playing. I put myself in unsafe situations sometimes just to see who will rescue me. Sometimes I push people away when they get too close just to see who will come back to find me and help me up. Rightnow, I am spiraling into darkness, I’m going somewhere I’ve nver been before. I don’t like it. Talking about my feelings has never helped, maybe thats because my thoughts never slow down enough so I know what it is am feeling. Writing things down helps. It helps me to organize what I am feeling and remember. When I talk, I easily forget whatever bothered me, or cant put it into words, or cant concentrate on one thing so noone understands what im saying. I’m feeling really down and suicidal right now but tomorrow I wont remember what was on my mind. Thats what makes me think I am bipolar…the conflicting thoughts, good today, bad tomorrow deals. Nothing is clear, my head is foggy. I feel confused and anxious and scared. But why? In a month or maybe a week this will all have cleared up and I can breathe on. I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. But what if a week is too long…and I don’t wanna wait. Please, I really need help.

No, I don’t need a therapist. I don’t wanna talk to a stranger, I don’t care if they care. I need to talk to somebody who truly gives a damn about my existence, who not only cares but understands. Somebody that I already trust, (trust is not an easy thing for me to come by.)

No, I dont need medications. A pill doesnt take the pain away. A pill can’t make everything all better. It might mask the pain a little and help to cope, but it’s not a problem-solver, a miracle-worker.

Just, I’m only 18. I already feel like I have lived for too long and it’s even more depressing to think I have to stick it out for another 70 years or so. Everything sucks right now. I try to find simple things to smile about like when my kitten does cute things*, but smiling doesn’t make me feel like it used to anymore. Whtever is wrongwith me only gets worse as I get older. I have made numerous suicide attempts and I am thinkin about it this very second…but deep deep down, somewhere, I don’t really wanna die, scared to die actually. THIS CONSTANT INTERNAL WAR!!! I think I should just check myself into some hospital and make sure they never ever lemme out.

HELP

November 3, 2008 at 1:10 am
(126) robert says:

how can so many people be thinking the same thing at the same time.

November 7, 2008 at 9:31 pm
(127) DMK says:

Saywhat—— i agree withe evrything you had to say, and am curious about what you said concerning drug use and REM sleep. im a 20 yr old university student now, but during high school had intense drug use to many different substances. i wonder every day whether this has made me feel the way i do everyday. i agree with what you said about nietzsche (i have read all of his works…one of my favorite philosophers).we can emerge from pain a stronger being and being capable of a brighter happiness because we have so much pain to compare it too….

November 10, 2008 at 8:19 pm
(128) Lucas says:

“What is wrong with me?” is what i am eternally asking myself. I have some mental problems, and I take like 6 or 7 pills for it, and I fell as if they don’t work. As some of you have already said, the things that made me happy don’t work anymore. The only relationship I’ve ever had is a gay one, and my boyfriend just dumped me for someone he only knows online. I constantly have thoughts of suicide, and I’m only 13. What is wrong with me!?!

November 13, 2008 at 12:23 am
(129) lyn says:

i’ve been feeling so down these past few months. i don’t know what’s wrong with me. it just seems like i’m not doing anything right at all and i’m feeling guilty for it. i don’t feel like going to class anymore; doing the things i usually do. it’s really strange. i hate myself for being like this. i’m feeling so stressed out.

November 13, 2008 at 5:19 pm
(130) aj01 says:

reply to

‘plez help’ message ’122′

Reading your post

“people quit on me and dont even know they were playing”.
“Sometimes I push people away when they get too close just to see who will come back to find me and help me up.”
As I was reading this, an issue of trust came to mind. When I reached the end of your post you yourself mentioned trust issues.
I wonder were you deeply hurt as a child? As I myself have done the same thing since I was 6 yrs old when my mum rightly so got rid of my dad because he was cheating. It effected me greatly in adult life although not as achild as my mum was amazing, although I never again let anyone close, I have spent many years studying Biological psychology and related subjects in an attempt to unravel the delayed onset of emotional termoil which manifested after the birth of my daughter. I have come to realize that Nobody will ever come back to find you, nobody is a mind reader! Nobody will ever take the abuse you dish and still be there for you! they are only human just as you and I. And you know what? Why should they? would you? you are probibly saying yes you would. but that is only because through your own experience you could relate to the pain and hurt that another may be suffering, (those who have not suffering can never know!) its not because they don’t love you I’m sure you know that they do. Its not because they don’t want to be there for you, Its because people can only do the best they can with the resources they have at the time, and if they don’t have the resources to help you or to endure your pushing away, then they can do no more than helplessly turn away.
You have a choice (and it IS a choice) to continue pushing people away or decide not to. and be open about your emotions. I have felt suicidal many times but have learnt to just accept it for what it is, a passing thought. but I would never do it because I have come to realized that we all have something inside of us which will try to break us, if we listen to it, it will win. (we dont have to listen)
I can only offer what I have learnt for myself. take life in sections small enough for you to handle. it could be 1hr it could be 10 seconds and say for the next 10 seconds I am going to have only happy kind loving thoughts. and when that time has passed say the same thing again, etc etc REFUSE to give a home to a negative thought!! it has no value in itself only in the value YOU give it by allowing it in your mind. Never say anything negative about yourself or others, catch it before you speak it, or think it. I know this may seem a difficult or even rediculous thing to do but through my own experience I know it works. Also If you listen to Guy Finley at life of learning he is inspirational, wise and a life saver. I am not advertizing for him I just want to point you to someone whos words have helped in my own process of understanding.
you are only 18 and 70yrs etc could be amazing!!! you say you want to speak to someone who truly gives a damn and understands. Almost all therapists really really do! if you find one that you feel doesnt then dont give up on them try another as with every profession there is the skillful and not so. dont give up

God bless
a reader who cares

November 17, 2008 at 9:40 pm
(131) BobbyG says:

I’m a 34 Male. Non-smoker, no drugs, no alcohol.

Is this just a phase?
Will it go away.
What is wrong with me! I’m an extremely happily married man. Healthy, great Job… amazing wife. The home is paid off. What more could I ask for! (Kids…I’m working on it!)

For the past month I’ve been feeling sad. Up till a month ago I was completely fine…nothig ever upset me like this. Maybe this isn’t that big of a deal…I might be making it a big deal out of it because this is my first heavy emotional “period”.

I can be sitting at my desk, driving or watching TV and then it will hit me.
I’ll get upset thinking about violence in America, vandalism, garbage, polution, the damage to our ecosystem….. even all the unnecessary junk that people buy at Wal-Mart gets to me.

Getting busy at work helps clear my mind.
But I shoudln’t do that…you(we) must deal with it. Put your thoughts on the table.
Deal with them.
No drugs.
Happy words!

Be the change you want to see in the world!
(Gandhi)

November 22, 2008 at 8:17 pm
(132) Starr says:

I also googled “what’s wrong with me” because I just can’t seem to get away from the darkness at times. There are other times when I feel great and I could conquer the world, but today, well, today is not one of those days. Today, I thought about suicide. I just feel like the worst person in the world. I want to run away from my family. I don’t want to be a mom to my daughter or a wife to my husband. That makes me infinitely more sad, because why would I not feel that way. I have a sweet baby girl and a good husband, but the thought of them right now scares me and makes me want to hurt myself. I am on anti-depressants, but only for post-partum depression. Shouldn’t that be under control by now. Why won’t this go away?? What am I doing wrong?? Why can’t I just be like everyone else?? AHHHHHHHHHH!

November 23, 2008 at 1:09 pm
(133) Jo-Marie says:

And here I am too. And here are all of you. Which is of some comfort, so perhaps I can offer some light to some, or even just one person, by sharing a little of me and some positives to think about.

I don’t have bi-polar (no mania experiences, just lots of downs) or personality disorder. I sense some here may well have something like that and this may be alleviated by a medication regime overseen by your doctor. Some are perhaps experiencing forms of depression, which can be triggered by many things – great or small, past or present. Depression is a lot to do with experiences, thoughts and feelings that we are finding difficult to process at any one time in our lives. But sometimes, it’s deeper than that – it’s not an ‘episode’, it’s more like an ongoing battle, that some of us have been fighting for years. Some of us seem predisposed to having life’s custard pies thrown at us time and again. Some of us are just better at coping.

For some of us, it is a mystery why we feel so unhappy in ourselves, or some may know the source of their unhappiness, but either way, we are overwhelmed and cannot begin to deal with the problems surrounding it. We are ‘malfunctioning’, and that suggests that we can be fixed to a fully functional state. Indeed, many of us can be fixed – but it depends on our individual resilience and extent of the damage. Some of us struggle and sink into a pattern of alienating and isolating ourselves from family, friends and society – the very people we depend on, but somehow feel we cannot.

We deal with most of our problems by rationalising and/or reconciling so we can understand and move on. And let me tell you – there is NO such thing as a trivial problem – because it is YOU who is experiencing it and only you can know the extent of its impact. Just remember that anyone who ‘measures’ your problem as being small, is only doing so because they are simply trying to rationalise it in an instant (like it’s their problem), and they do not understand its scope or impact. If a problem is having an adverse effect on you, then it’s serious, no matter how big or little the problem appears to others.

When things don’t make us happy anymore… Life is about exploration and discovery. There was a time in our lives when that’s all we did – as kids. And if we had a positive parenting environment, it was positively encouraged. As we get older, we leave that childish curiousness behind, and lodge ourselves in society’s ideals – the college, university, work and family ethics, and we often dismiss ideas of discovery. If we are happy in relationship/family and work life, then it’s other areas that need to be explored and we shouldn’t repress those natural instincts. We need to be challenged and discover new things. If we don’t have that, life becomes static and predictable. Things become unsatisfactory, and no longer provide the joy they once did. We need to feel fulfilled in every aspect of our lives to be totally happy. The things is to recognise what you are happy with, and maintain those, while exploring other areas that you want to change. For those who missed out on discovery as kids, it comes back to haunt us too. We want what we never had. But as adults, we have power and freedom to change that. Life is for living, as I am so often reminded. The thing to remember is that you can’t find happiness in just one place/thing. It’s a collection of things working well that makes us happy. And our freedom to add to it when we feel we need to.

I have always felt a sense of unhappiness and incompleteness inside, so finding things to make me happy have been tough going. This year I travelled, and although it brought pleasure, it didn’t make me happy – I’m looking for long term happiness that I think most of us want. I wonder about myself, who I am, and though I can laugh and seem ‘normal’ to others, how I feel inside is the exact opposite – and those feelings are with me all the time. It’s so tiring…Constantly I wonder why I am here, when I BELIEVE the impact I make in this world is so insignificant. And why has my life been so full of trauma and so empty of love into the bargain? Do I make my own life so black? How do you repair that?

I realise many of my problems go way back to when I was a kid, but it’s mainly the last 4 yrs that my mind has become a tornado of thoughts, feelings and unhealed wounds, triggered by the suicide of my brother. Feelings I had never reconciled from the past, because I had no-one or nowhere to turn to back then. I was raised with no affection, love, support, or encouragement (understatement). I was a quiet, shy and unhappy kid and I had suicide thoughts around 8, and tried to commit suicide at 10. I’ve had suicide thoughts literally every day since – sometimes it’s a struggle to fight them. And it seems I live my life to please others, until they no longer need me. I think that’s it – I want to be needed as much as I am loved. Does that ever happen?

It’s been a stream of dealing with ‘losses’ my whole life – many family deaths and relationship failures – and sexual and physical abuse. I have tended to seek self-value from other people, and I always blamed myself for relationship losses – because I saw myself as worthless, not good enough for anyone or anything. I hold the few close relationships I form in very high regard, and I want to be perceived in a positive light, (kind, caring, helpful, practical, witty etc.) and in fact I am perceived that way, so I cannot express my inner ‘dark’ feelings to these people because I feel they would not ‘cope’ with the depth of them. I am so guarded about the feelings I express.

But I know it’s important NOT to suppress these dark feelings. It is clearly VERY damaging. The healing process can only begin by expressing them and EXPLORING them. In exploring them, we can begin to understand these feelings. In understanding them, we can begin to accept (or change) and eventually move on.

In truth, my anger is mostly at myself. I think standards I set for myself are too high, and I fail miserably. I am too hard on myself – I let myself down because I hate being me most of the time. I don’t set such rigid standards for others though. With my parents, I could never please them, because positive things I did were never acknowledged. No praise, EVER. My ‘normal behaviour’ was always good, [even my mother stated this] so the smallest deviation from my normal would mean I was ‘bad’ – even if I broke a plate by accident. (My mother once ignored me for three months for something as trivial.) I have realised that I am susceptible to being taken advantage of. It isn’t about being gullible, it’s about me seeking value from people – and some of those people I really don’t need in my life. I often shy away from forming new relationships with people because I can’t take any more damage/losses.

For under 16′s experiencing ANY troubles, (no matter how ‘small’ you think it my be to others) or if your behaviour is wreckless, agressive or anything else that could lead to you harm — then if you are unable to talk to your parents (maybe your parenting environment is not a nurturing or supportive one), please talk to a teacher or other adult that you trust. Otherwise contact a children’s service for advice (NSPCC, Childline etc – you don’t have to be suffering abuse for their advice and support and you can remain anonymous too). Support IS out there for you and people can help you and better inform and involve your parents too. Just tell them what you said on here, and don’t be afraid to take this first step – people are there to help and it can turn things around and can change your life.

Some things you can do to help yourself, if you cannot share your burden with anyone or even if you are taking medication or receiving counselling. Taking each day one at a time, begin a self-HEALING process. (NOT self-improvement!) Look inside yourself. You need to learn about yourself and feel comfortable with who you are. Discover yourself. Understand yourself. Give yourself credit – there are ALWAYS positives! You are not ‘bad’ just because you feel bad. Cut some slack on yourself. Stop thinking about feeling bad, and then feeling bad because of it. Focus on your strengths, your talents, your ‘gifts’, things you have achieved and things you have done where others have benefited.

Begin a gradual process of change. Maybe begin to look at any morbid/aggressive behaviours and feelings that you have developed, and the triggers that created them – why/when/how they occurred. Is it something you feel you can change? What would you like to change? What can/can’t you change? (Be REALISTIC about this.) Look at each aspect of your life. What could be better/improved? What needs to change? Learn to accept what you can’t change – and focus on what CAN be changed. What does your heart desire? Forget what others may think or say – this is about you and your aspirations. What can you achieve? What things do you need to do to achieve it? Set yourself small ACHIEVABLE goals – start simple, take small steps. Try to do something constructive each day, and give yourself small rewards for doing it. Make a life-plan for the next year. Where do you want to be in a year? Or two years?
Now for some simpler things. These will help alleviate pressures, improve coping and focus and provide a positive outlet. (You need to put a little effort in.) Take care of yourself. Eat well. Get regular sleep. Get out of the house – go for a walk to the beach, park, or just somewhere ‘therapeutic’, away from crowds, where you can take in fresh air, enjoy nature. (I’ve watched clouds of starlings blackening the sky with their aerial displays at the train station on a cold February evening.) Go to the zoo or aquarium. Call a friend, go for a (de-caf) coffee and a chat and catch up with events or see a movie. ‘Adopt’ a dolphin, tiger, rhino – or a child overseas etc. Rent a dvd – watch a Disney animation or comedy. Lift your spirits. Pamper/treat yourself. Try something new – an activity, sport, or hobby or voluntary work. Do small tasks to help someone else, carry shopping, open doors, clean windows etc. (Lone elderly folks appreciate the help and the company.)

If you have someone to support you through it, then take that opportunity – but you don’t necessarily need someone to always be around you. Do try to maintain contact with people you care about, no matter if it’s a one line text, or on-line message – just to keep lines of communication open and a life line to reality. Let them know you are ‘ok’. (They will only pester you for so long, and then just stop – because they don’t know what’s going on [do they?], and may think YOU don’t want them in your life any more.)

I am at a crux point now. Coming to the end of my degree (a BIG goal for me!), I’m single, children grown up, financially secure – and I hope to find some peace of mind and my ‘place in the world’ when I start working with the people I want to support and help. My childhood was so devoid of parental affection and encouragement that I want to make a real difference to other kids going through the same thing. That is what gives me a level of happiness – so I am focussing on that and the rest of it is a slow ongoing process (30years worth!) so just taking those small steps…one day at a time…

November 26, 2008 at 12:56 am
(134) JB says:

i was googling something i don’t remember and it brought up “whats wrong with me” so i decided to look closer. I have read through many of your comments and I can’t say i know what you guys are going through. For me, its not about anyone else, its a choice to be happy or sad. Why be sad and miserable when you can be happy? maybe this isnt the case for you guys but thats my outlook in life. Switch on some Bob Marley and be happy =)

The only comment i can agree with is the one that said, they cant stop thinking. I CANT EVER STOP THINKING. I think about anything, everything, just trying to understand. I think to the point where my head hurts and i never can seem to figure out the answer!! Marijuana is the only thing that evens me out and even then I’ll sit in my room and write 50 pages about what i’m thinking about. I have experienced pshycedelic mushrooms before and that was the only time I have ever figured something out in my endless abyss of a brain.
Maybe i’m just unusual or deranged but sometimes i cant stand it!

November 27, 2008 at 1:24 pm
(135) Garima says:

Hahahahahhhaahaha
I don’t believe this! Google is awesomely effective. I mean it is mindboggling how so many people can type in the same thing :P :P

November 28, 2008 at 11:39 pm
(136) Miranda says:

I hope this hits home for some of you! The fear of thinking you are all alone in some cases makes you so similiar to others. There is a HUGE percent of people that have read this and did not respond. But look at all who did? Yes there are factors such as diet, chemical imbalances & history of us all that can be held accountable for. However realizing that every now and then in life we all have our doubts. Maybe we aren’t pretty enough, skinny enough or smart enough, or that we are unworthy of and or living up to expectations of others instead of ourselves. I am 37 years old…been diagnosed and VERY misdiagnosed for a lot of things taking amounts of meds that I did not need to. Some people do, but not for me. Positive thinking and realizing that because you feel this way and you seem all alone MAKES YOU ALOT LIKE others!!! Remember that! Meds and Dr.’s are stepping stones for most, healing is the key. Positive outlets & knowing these good things that happen to us would not be there if we did not suffer the bad things to point them out. I hope anyone who reads this takes a second look before thinking that they are SO seperate from the world…we all have issues and fears that are valid. It’s how you overcome them that will define how it affects you in the future. I speak from experience & being strong and facing the self-actualization of my own self. THINK POSITIVE when the NEGATIVE come knocking is a great way to start, not easy but can be done!!!! Us people like this are great for arts & poetry & expression. Cause we care more deeply then others…that’s why we get hurt and feel different or like an outsider to this world and feel no one understands. But we are not.
Good Luck to all and Please smile it is infectious!
It works I am living proof.

December 2, 2008 at 12:59 am
(137) Dana says:

finding this has taken a bit of weight from my mind.
i am scared of dying
i am scared of cancer
i am scared of my family dying
i am always sleepy
im overweight
i worry,when im not worrying i worry because im not worrying…….

i have been to the dr and had several tests
still i am convinced there is something bad wrong with me,and i get told”its all in my head”
maybe it is but its my head and its going on.and i want it to stop.

December 4, 2008 at 9:30 pm
(138) BobbyG says:

My first post is #128.
It’s been a little over 2 weeks since I first wrote. I’ve learned that this is the first BIG personal mental moment in my life. And because I’m 34, it’s a bit scarey. Especially because I’ve had it so good for so long. I do periodically have sad thoughts, but the thoughts are not as mentally descriptive and no where near as brain/head heavy.
I never did and still don’t find my appetite for food or “sex” different. Things seem on track……..I just have these thoughts.

I think I’m feeling sad because some close family just left to go back home. I have 2 relatives who live on the other end of the country and that have been visiting for the past week.
So much fun… Good times.
Now they are gone.
I’ve got the flu, and all I do is rest (and think)… whoops!
And… a close friend of the community passed away. Tragic incident.

Friends, unless your condition is severe….avoid meds. Most have been telling to look on the bright side…..and smile!
Happy thoughts!
A Happy being creates the chemcicals we need in our brains.

Society overdiagnosis everything!

December 5, 2008 at 11:43 pm
(139) Kate says:

I came here too, because i feel all alone in this world. and it’s nice to see that i’m not really alone, everyone here feels the same way,I do.

December 7, 2008 at 6:57 pm
(140) nancyhector says:

Try doing ‘stuff’ for other people who REALLY need your help. The endorphins that your own body will release, will counter-act the ‘disappointment hormones’ that cloud our thinking.

December 14, 2008 at 3:03 pm
(141) ... says:

I like many others typed “what is wrong with me” and came here. Suddenly I don’t feel so alone. I hope not only I can get the help I need, but the rest of you as well who are searching for an answer to make the pain stop.

December 16, 2008 at 8:22 pm
(142) Nick says:

so if you are feeling those “symptoms” you are depressed, but i thought thats is just everyday life. Sometimes you have good days and sometimes you have bad ones. EVERYONE has these feelings, everyone once in their life has questioned themselves about what they are doing. So i dont know if this is a mental problem (i mean no offense) or is it people who just have a lot of time to think. And i mean this with no offense and i really want to know which one it is. And sorry if i seem like i dont care because i do my friend has a problem like this and i dont know how to approach it without knowing if its serious or he need to spend some time with his buddies?

December 17, 2008 at 10:49 pm
(143) Just like you says:

Welcome to life!
Sure….. everyone has ups and downs.

The best thing to do is deal with your thoughts.
Don’t hide behind drugs/pills, sleeping, a busy life, etc, etc….
Deal with your thoughts! Talk with family and friends.
Go somewhere private and talk out loud.

When you get everything out, and deal with the issue at hand. Then you will truly see what life is all about.
It’s a quest.
It’s amazing!

Be the change you want to see in the world!

December 18, 2008 at 4:36 am
(144) sofia says:

http://www.mymoodmonitor.com

its realy great for giving you an idea of what
you may be suffering
try it , it helped me

December 18, 2008 at 2:19 pm
(145) JJ says:

hi everyone. i can relate to many of the thoughts posted on here. i constantly have the feeling that i am “weird” or not like everyone else. i feel as though im an observer on the earth and that this is not really my home. in my mind, i want to achieve so many things but my body just wont act! im ALWAYS tired, heavy and i just stay on my bed watching tv most of the time except for when i am forced to DO something. it sounds terrible i know, but i HATE doing anything except sitting in my den in bed. in fact i love that. im happiest just staring at the tv. no one really knows how i really feel or the strange inexplicable tiredness that grips me. everyday i plan to do something and make a change but the day disappears before you know it. i feel very guilty for all this wasted time.i have dreams of doing great things in the world and making a difference but i cant physically get going. damn! and i totally relate to comment number 82. i feel afraid all the time that people think im weird, or that they dont like me or that im too miserable for their company. i avoid speaking to peole sometimes because i cant be bothered to pretend to be happy or to try to sound happy on the phone. then i worry people will get tired of me because im so down. i think people avoid me. someone posted that they laugh a lot but are unhappy deep down. me too. when i am with people i laugh so much and makes jokes but alone i cry for everything.If i find something funny on the TV i laugh but it turns to sobbing!!? if someone is upset (TV) i start. what is going on. if i go out of my house for any reason, i feel the need for “full recovery” which consists of getting into bed in my awful “chilling out clothes” (lol) and watching TV with my tired aching body. im so frustrated. my house is a mess and i cant keep up with it which bugs me so much because im very uptight about neatness but the last few years ive lived like a slob so seeing all this mess around me just helps the misery. i have kids and am recently single and im just about managing and trying to hide how badly i really feel from the kids. sorry, i feel guilty now for rambling and talking all about me. i hope everyone here finds peace. i really do….the key is: “…And i have created the jinn (unseen spirits) and mankind only to worship me” Thats why we’re all here.

December 23, 2008 at 4:33 pm
(146) Pilgrim says:

In many ways I am happy that I found this forum/Portal to write about me !

to start at once, I never know what is wrong with me. I am 44 ( damn ! ). Yes damn.. because I never could find a a girl for myself. Not that I am looking for a special girl. Even if I leave out the topic of girls for a while.. , like I read from one of the above comments.. , I am so tired of listening to people telling me that I have a perfect life. Well No.. if I look from inside ( exactly ) I am very much torn and tatterred. I can’t make any personal relationship with any person ( man / Woman ). I stay out side almost all the time. I observe everything infront of me from out side. I look at the situation in which I am at present too from compeltely out side. I never get so emotionally involed in the situation.. ! I understand the siutuation but I stay out side. I just duty to the situation but still stay out side. EVery time it is almost like I am looking at it in a panorama.. well absorbing what is happenning.. and what is my role and what I have to do and when ! Well, may sound so nice.. but the draw-back.. I realized after many years is that.. I never ever get any lesson from the situation to improve myself to be integrated well into the people around. Then the worse.. I can never develop any personal relationship with anyone. I have sympathy.. i show it at situations needed.. but then just as duty and very full-fillingly. But after everything I am completely alone ( and clean from the situation ). Nothing gets into me from the situations or people.. but what ever comes from with in my thoughts with such morals and suty and with such hard rules I have already learned and assimilated in myself. Am I satuarated ? Or am I an escapist .. because of some hidden inhibitions ? I am so tired surely by now. May be I have a life now.. which can best be described as a mere ‘social conciousness’ but not an ypart that should have been from my natural biology.. or being a natural living human being ! Where exactly I am sturck with ?

Then coming to the most natural urge of having a partner.. yes this is where exactly I feel the pinch.. because this is also the area which is sufficiently handicapped by all my traits I have expressed avobe.

Who can help.. what is wrong with me ?

Yes one can e-mail me at siddartha.montik@gmail.com !

Thank you !

December 26, 2008 at 6:50 pm
(147) Hollow boy says:

Hey everyone,
To the guy above sorry I’ve no advice but I feel the same. I ended up here the same way a few others did!
I don’t know whats up and I’ve only been feeling this way for a few months- I think it could be because of a girl? I have that type of stuff going on she said she liked me one day and a few days later wants to be just friends? ooooooooooookaaaaaaaay…
I guess I’m not too bad I’m only recently 19 but I feel EMPTY. I don’t understand but does anyone? Guess not. I go from feeling happy (which I am now) to hollow to angry (i’m a metalhead) and slipknot have often been my help they are kinda like me.
Guess I’ve nothing much else to say… I have the BEST few friends and they make me feel happy- beyond that sometimes I feel i’ll break- i’m not into the whole irish culture thing ie booze etc- i’m socially awkward i’m kinda like chandler from friends too- funny but have serious problems with getting close to someone… if theres anything wrong with me i think its mild i know what i feel thats why i ended up here…
Well thanks for reading this erratic funness :)

December 28, 2008 at 9:57 am
(148) Tefera says:

Hello everybody!!
Guess what?!!!
I also feel the same very thing. Due to these feelings of mine I can’t just live in peace. Every where I go, I end up in having a disagreement. Now I am so fed up with myself. I tried to to be nice and calm. But I couldn’t. I can’t tolerate even silly mistakes. It makes me mad, drives me crazy. I just don’t know what should I do. Please just say something on how not to get angry in everything. I hate it, I hate myself.

December 28, 2008 at 1:41 pm
(149) Agrivar says:

hmmm… i typed whats wrong with me too…
I used to self medicate myself with mass amounts of alcohol.Then my wife said it was over. I went to rehab where they diagnosed me with depression. They seemed to help for a bit but now im feling scred and alone. I feel like i just need to be loved but im feeling like no one even cares about me.iI wish someone would hug me and tell me i’ll be ok.
I took all of my lexipro and syraquil in an attempt to end it all but all it did was make me sleep.I’m realy not sure why i did it.I realy don’t want to die..i love my wife and kids.I just want to be happy.I ant to feel normalI need help :(

December 28, 2008 at 10:14 pm
(150) Kay says:

When I typed it in, I was hoping to find this huge checklist of symptoms, which would tell me that I am actually physically sick with something. Have been diagnosed bi-polar (3x)but always with JUST the manic stuff. Now, at 55, I feel like I have aged about 100 years since I was 48. I can sleep for days and days on end, watch endless medical TV shows, especially House, and my arms hurt all the time, and my ankles always give way. I can hardly walk. I go to the doctor, but they always tell me to see a psychiatrist, and I do not do well on any medicines. I feel like I am done with living, and, at this point, I WANT to have a fatal disease. I think, somehow that will perk me up, and then I can be brave and motivating to others, plus I can say to everyone …. “See … I TOLD you I was really sick!”

December 30, 2008 at 1:39 pm
(151) Christopher says:

It’s sad to see how many people feel the same as me. Sorry.

December 30, 2008 at 5:40 pm
(152) "V" says:

Ditto to finding this link on google with the magic phrase. :) I have been labored with this feeling of despair for so long and it always seems to be on the surface and then I’ll take a 12 foot plunge now and again. I’m in the deep end right now and just not happy with me, my state of mind, my job or my life. I feel I’m not living up to my destiny or something??? I can’t put my finger on it…but I’m just in a sink hole.

January 3, 2009 at 9:26 am
(153) Meg says:

It’s funny how we all believe we’re the only ones who feel like this, when there are just so many. At least, I feel alone.

And you know, I really shouldn’t… because I have lots of family and friends.

I can get eight hours of sleep a night, and wake up feeling as if I haven’t slept at all.

I could go to the doctor, and be released in perfect health, and yet, I still feel sick.

I feel like no one can relate to me, even though there are people who do. Even though I share many things with so many others.

And it’s just so much deeper. You’re not depressed, and yet, you are. You should be fine, but you’re not.

And it’s so heavy. It’s suffocating and overwhelming, and everything just seems to pile up, even the smallest things, until you feel as if you’re drowning in despair.

And you just can’t lift yourself up from it, no matter how hard you try. It may come and go, but it’s more often than not.

It’s… maddening.

And no one really understands… because they aren’t you.

January 3, 2009 at 11:29 am
(154) Hollow Boy says:

I feel I’m not living up to my destiny or something???

Thats exactly it… There’s something not quite there, something missing… And it makes me feel empty. I’m happy yet not, I want something and don’t want it. I feel like a walking contradiction it so chaotic it pulls me in both directions… I can’t describe it any other way…

Someone once told me she felt empty too and as a religious person, she ascribed that emptiness to God trying to make her do what she was meant to do, trying to make her get up and perform her tasks? It helped a little :)

January 6, 2009 at 11:13 pm
(155) lena says:

I wake up oneday and i feel like everything can be okay. 2 hours pass, and im procrastinating. i sink into unmotivation. into depression. How fucking self indulgent, right? Bullshit! This is a fucking disease. and its ruining me, and my relationship. im 25..in a 3 year relationsip. i was diagnosed with anxiety and depression at 16. fuck that. i was on paxil for 3 months till i gave it up. chemicals..its all a scheme! maybe MAYBE therpay.,good therpy..the kind nobody can afford..maybe thats the answer. i lash out on my boyfriend, over react, yell and look crazy..and 15 min later im ready to FORGET IT..im ready to just..live again. its almost like i need the release. do i have anger issues or am i bipolar? am i both?? Jesus. The funniest part of this is, im an actress. my life’s work is to be eccentric. or not. but something. problem is ive been living my whole life like its a movie for ten years. i feel like i could die any day. im capricious and i act on whim. i have problems. we all do. but what about those people who deal with real fucking problems. im not trivializing this disorder. im suggesting that maybe we arent BUSY enough. no? gosh, we take everything for granted dont we. limbs. memory. life. lips. love. problem is, people like us dont know how to love right. we’re poisoned in the mind. isnt that how you feel? its how i feel. fuck your medication. throw it out. it will only make you worse. never depend on something chemical. there are..or will be other ways! good luck to you all. i understand every one of you.

January 8, 2009 at 3:14 am
(156) Me says:

Yep, I did it too, typed in “what is wrong with me,” and got here.

January 16, 2009 at 10:16 am
(157) Justine says:

I also typed in “What’s wrong with me?” on google and it seems so weird to think that people allover the world ask themselves this question everyday.

All these words really hit home and i kinda feel glad to know i’m not alone. at the same time it’s sad to see so many people so sad.

defo thinking of seeing a psychologist ;)

January 16, 2009 at 1:11 pm
(158) Lisa says:

I typed it in too. I think we all did.

I feel that I will never be happy. I will never have the relationship I want with my bf, nor will I ever find it with someone else. I love my friends, I have no friends. I feel like people are always talking negative about me…yes I am insecure. I constantly feel that my bf is sleeping around. I’ve been on Sarafem (believing is was PMDD) for 2 years, initally it seemed to make me feel better, now, I don’t notice much of a difference anymore. I hate myself, I hate my life. And there is no real reason for me to feel this way. Mostly, I feel that I am just a freak and will always feel this way. I will never have the happiness I seek

January 20, 2009 at 10:06 am
(159) Change says:

What is wrong with me? Or all of us for that matter, that we all have found ourselves asking a search engine that same question, only to find ourselves in awe of the many others asking the same question we just did, and leaving encouraging words for others to read….but still we have our own problems to tackle!!!
Could it be that we are a portion of the world’s population who are unwilling to accept things for what they are? I bet a lot of us are ignorant of many things which we wish to know, but lack the knowledge to research, and even still, are afraid to ask the right questions of the right people…Who are the right people? Therapists? These are human beings with their own failings. Often, people choose this profession because they wish to know the answer to the same question we all have recently asked google.”What is wrong with me?”
Personally, I had an abusive childhood, found out later in life that parents and family members lied and hid things from me all throughout growing up, Parents were into drugs and alcohol(so I did too) Parents were dealers in California(who never grasped the concept of saving money or making it work for you) I graduated high school with the idea that I would be okay just working 2 service class unskilled jobs for the rest of my life to make ends meet, After several years of doing just that, I find that I am fed up with working all of the time and I start dealing pot. Somewhere in the middle of this change of behavior, I impregnate 2 women who like to assist in the causing of stress in my life(they have their own problems which they can not deal with…go figure)I now sit here in front of a laptop that isn’t even mine, questioning myself about myself. Paranoia has set in and I am struggling with the temptation to keep making the money of a dealer, despite severe possibilities that I could be facing prison time. My girlfriend has seen the worst of me, yet she still holds on despite several attempts by the both of us to end the relationship…..I may have gone too far with my explaination here, but There is something I am fairly sure of. Meds are not the answer. Every other person who blogged about their meds all say the same thing, they work for a while and then things are the same again, then they are prescribed something else, to the same effect.
So…how do we as human beings achieve confidence, motivation, courage(cuz really it’s fear we fear right?)I often hear thatg in order for change to occur, the individual has to want to change. Okay, so how do we go about changing? Start by taking negatives out of our lives? Okay, so how do you convince someone who loves marijuana, that it is negative and needs to be removed? Furthermore, how do you convince someone of anything that they can’t convince themselves to do? There are many many successful people out in the world, and there are many ways to become successful at anything positive. The trick is being a self starter, and quit waiting for someone else to come along and help us out of the grave we have dug for ourselves. Could it be friends and family holding us back? well then why not take them out of your life while you journey towards achievements? Sometimes what we are comfortable with, is really what’s hurting us. Okay, maybe I’ve rambled too much, maybe I’ve been helpful? I’ll never know, I just hope I can one day take my own advice, thats the hardest thing for me. To those who are still reading…damn you’re patient ;) But I also wish you all courage, intelligence, and the ability to make it happen(because luck either was never there, or just runs out)

January 25, 2009 at 11:32 pm
(160) Valentina says:

I feel the same way. i dont know why. I feel like no one waants to be with me. And i feel alone everyday. My boyfriend doesnt understand what im going thur. And i need him right now. Life is hard right now, he doesnt want me to work, he doesnt understand that i want to help him. I dont know anymore, i wish i has someone to talk to.

January 26, 2009 at 2:30 am
(161) Paul says:

Writing this is so hard to do. It’s difficult to understand what I’m feeling much less put it in words. I feel the same way as most of you wrote.

I can’t remember the last time or part of my life where I enjoyed anything or the company of other people. I have no friends, my family doesn’t really know me cause I don’t let them in. I don’t speak much to my family even though I live with them everyday for the past 23 years. I have probably talked to my online friends in video games then I have to my family my whole life. It’s something about anonymity that makes me want to speak out.

Even though I’m probably just rambling on and asking for a pity party, but I keep saying that typing this will help me but for a fact I know I will become the unmotivated, why-does-this-all-matter kind of person. Someday I feel like I about to climb out of this ditch I’m in but somehow I manage to fall back in with no way out.

I wake up each day and wonder why I’m still alive. But I keep on going and for reasons I don’t know why.

I have a plan laid out in my mind but there’s problem of actually executing it. Every night before I sleep I think about changing but as soon I wake up, I just want to lay down more and just do nothing. It’s become a habit that’s almost impossible to break. I’m on this vicious cycle for almost 3 years.

I think about getting help or guidance but then I either think what’s the use or I just can’t do it because it seems so hard. There is also this one time where I felt real pain and just fainted in front of my family, I should have gone for help then I thought it was this physical manifestation of what I am feeling emotionally but I just shrugged it off and told my family I’m fine.

Sometimes I would stare into nothingness thinking about nothing. It would probably go on for hours and not notice at all.

Hi, my name is Paul, 22, I feel like I’m a shell with no substance or meaning. Completely void of anything. What is wrong with me?

January 27, 2009 at 2:07 pm
(162) Tony says:

Heya Paul, I just felt like replying to yuo, I hope you don’t mind. I don’t know if you’ll see it either. I’m 19 and the way you talked about a shell ther caught my attention…
I also start thinking about shells when I think of me, but I say that I am in a shell. I’m really really shy and its sometimes hard for me socially so I lock up protected by the shell that is the me I present to everyone who I don’t really know. What I want to say is I’m goging through a really weird stage in my life, I’ve never really felt hollow or empty before this. A few months ago I was a lot worse I seem to be coming out of it now…
I feel better lately and I just want to say to Paul and everyone else here… Relax… I tend to beat myself up over silly things… I’m the only one that does no one else sees mistakes I make as a big deal… The thing is I often hold myself back from trying all sorts of things with this built up anxiety I feel inside. I did my best to just chill out and its working.. I went to a course with people I never met which is a nerve wracking thing for me but I’ve made new friends now its fantastic. For me, the thing is I have to relax… I don’t presume to know how to help everyone I’m just a student but just have faith in you and the rest will follow…
I don’t know if thats a help to anyone but it got a load off me :P thanks.

January 29, 2009 at 8:14 pm
(163) Lisa says:

Hey Tony, what type of course are we talking about?

My comment is a few up, on Jan 16th…if anyone would like to chat, please feel free to email me snoopyfanmi@yahoo.com

January 29, 2009 at 8:36 pm
(164) Dan says:

I also typed the same thing into google – very strange…

I think the only thing worse than being depressed is feeling nothing at all. To be empty and void of life. It’s even worse for me since a year ago i was probably one of the most charasmatic, confident, life affirming people you could ever meet.

Fortuantely i can identify how i’ve ended up like this, which events have contributed to my current mind set. Unfortunately however, there is no way to undo the past. I feel empty because i love someone very much. Genuninly love them, even after all the shit we’ve been through. And they tell me they love me in return (and show it too) except this person, this amazing person is misrable, so upset and unconfident because they believe i don’t love them. Every time i utter a kind word, a compliment, they cry. What the heck am i supposed to do??

I am empty because until my love reaches its destination – the true essessence of who i am exists between bodies. I think that can be generalised to mean, quite simply -

Until your life has meaning you will feel empty. It doesn’t matter what you’ve got in life, friends/family, money, etc because without meaning we are nothing.

Nothing, attracts nothing. Be somthing, be anything, conciously choose to be someone, don’t wait for meaning to fall on your lap, the great irony is that nothing/no one will validate your existence except you. Think of how many of us there are typing those words into google – if each of us gets up each day and does one thing, starts up a conversation with a stranger, does a good deed etc, your life will begin to gain meaning as you realise you are apart of something bigger.

WOAH really went off on one there… Sorry about that. But this page seems to be helping people get things off their chest so thats my contribution! =)

January 31, 2009 at 8:44 am
(165) Tony says:

Heya Lisa, haha sorry it was a guitar playing course its really great:)I just really needed to get out so I went for it… :P

I can identify with Dan… I gave so much of myself to one person only to be let down- it was fair and honest I guess but she lead me on for a few days haha i’m getting over it… She was and is so special to me… Kinda sad thinkin about it now haha but I’m ok… Life goes on and with some faith in ourselves we CAN be ok… :) :):):)

February 7, 2009 at 6:49 am
(166) Angie says:

Hi, im 20 years old and ever since i can rememeber maybe 6 years old i suffered from anxiety attackes for no reason, (i used to call them belly-flops) it hurt and i got them up until high school along with depression most days. I knew i was an ok kid nothing terribly wrong with my life, i had a mother that would do anything for me, a father who didnt give but divorce is so common these days, maybe u think im babbling, but i googled “whats wrong with me” and was surrprised to find 2yrs of comments from ppl who feel the same as me… I always thought i was stong person i dealt with my hardships and unfortunate experiences as a teenager and got on with my life pushing my anxiety and depression aside, i always knew i was happy and gratful for my life and when i realised a had poly cystic i blamed my hormone imbalence on my mood disorder, but still i sit here tonight happy but then all of a sudden i feel this cold empty feeling around me and creeping inside and i wonder why is this feeling coming back and when will it go away. thankyou guys for makng me feel not so alone :)

February 9, 2009 at 2:29 am
(167) Vic says:

Hey. yeh, i googled it. Here i am, as were all of you. I guess we’re just the same. even though everyone always says “you’re not alone” who really takes comfort from that? If you ask me, that’s just sad. I love you all, because you understand. and if you understand, it means that you are just as fucked as me. but if we were’t strong by nature, we’d probably have ended the misery long ago, as i’m sure most of you have pondered. will it end? it doesn’t matter, the end is not important, only the journey. sry to be such a downer, but i see more lows than highs. it’ll be like 2 weeks of depression with half a day of contentness. and if i’m lucky, even some happiness. i feel like i don’t belong, anywhere. I feel like i would get tired of heaven. is there any hope left for one who doesn’t want it? oh well, i’ll never know how far hell goes until i walk it. Here’s to all of you hurt by the cold. See you guys at the end. When life knocks you down, gnaw at it’s ankles:)

February 9, 2009 at 2:33 am
(168) vic says:

it feels really good to talk about it

February 9, 2009 at 3:17 pm
(169) Dasein says:

Reading some of these comments, it does seem as if we artistic types are either wired differently prone to mood disorders.

Perhaps that is what makes us who we are. If we were any other way we’d have no passion for the thing(s) we do. Many of the great minds suffered from mood disorders/fluctuations.

Though it sucks most days… sometimes to the point where i feel it would’ve been better if i never existed – I wouldn’t have me any other way.

“I AM ME AND I AM OK” – Virgina Satir (great affirmation/mantra, check it out)

February 16, 2009 at 12:14 pm
(170) Alix says:

So many people on here are saying that they feel the same way…. well yes, same here.. but what do we Do about it?? I have no idea why I even feel this way!… I have a great life.. great job.. wonderful family.. a man who Absolutely loves me more than words can say.. awesome friends…… so what the hell?? I don’t understand why I feel alone, mad, self conscience, insecure, not confident at all anymore…… i always used to be. I try taking vitamins that my chiropractor suggested.. nothing. Taking classes for “fun”.. nothing. Reading books, talking to people, getting a dog…. nothing, nothing, nothing. I want to know how feel happy again!

Please.. somebody…. help me.

February 16, 2009 at 5:58 pm
(171) Jenn says:

My thoughts exactly Alix…How do we change it? I have the greatest husband, wonderful kids, a rewarding job, good friends and so much to be proud of…yet, I am not happy. I tried changing my location, went after what I really wanted as a career and tried to change my family life to make it less lacking. And where did I get with all that? NO WHERE! I am even more miserable and I want to go back home and start fresh with family and old friends but I can’t. So knowing I got myself stuck only makes me want to take myself out of the picture and move on alone. Which would just mess up my husband and kids, and I do love them. So how do I fix this mess, that so many of my friends would love to be in? No one listens when you say you need help, they just tell you how stupid you sound.

Well, maybe I sound stupid, but at least I am smart enough to know I need help!

February 19, 2009 at 2:37 pm
(172) Paul says:

Wow we are a lot of people who are depressed.
I almost cried when i read these comments
Everybody says im okay but im not.
thanks everyone here

February 21, 2009 at 11:58 pm
(173) This one says:

I am in the same boat with everyone here. I have also been diagnosed with anxiety and depression but I think those are false, just the doctor trying to label me as something. Anxiety meds make me just forget whatever is bothering me and get drowzy, and depression meds make me feel like absolute SHI*!!

I have the greatest girl in the world right now and she gets hurt hearing me tell her i dont feel well some days, and i dont like lying to her and tell her i feel fine when I dont. It effects my ability to go out at nights and have a good time and its hurting our relationship, even tho we genuinely are about each other.

So on a general concensus… is this feeling depression? I dont want to have to seek help or medication for it, i want to be strong and do it on my own. you know?

February 23, 2009 at 11:40 pm
(174) LF says:

i can write a book about similar feelings to everyone on here, and i offer my sympathy (or is it empathy lol?) one thing that has helped me lately:

one thing i have been depressed about is the plight of animals in the world after stumbling onto info about the reality for them (which is pretty well hidden from us). for a while it just ate into me b/c we humans mostly cause our own problems but they are not at fault and we as a race treat them like…well, they’re in hell. so one day it just got to me and now i am slowly but surely on my way to becoming a vegetarian. not full there yet but i feel good DESPITE (i’ll admit it) my food being less tasty.

while i’d love for everyone here to become vegans, i’m not saying that this is the solution for even one person on here. and i also have many other issues (motivation, confidence, paranoia) that are not solved by this step. BUT, maybe it’s just one solution. think of something that bothers you in the world, and do one little thing about it and see if that goes anywhere, or changes your feeling. it might work. it might not…but it’s worth a shot, no?

thanks for reading. i am with all of you.

L

February 27, 2009 at 5:15 pm
(175) Ricardo says:

Can’t believe so many of us googled “What is wrong with me” Guess am not alone here. Don’t really wanna talk about it right now, but just feel something in my life isn’t right, life exceeds me sometimes and I can’t find comfort on anything I try.

March 4, 2009 at 2:04 am
(176) S. Reed says:

i never really thought much of the saying “you’re not alone,” but now it has meaning to me.

(bare with me, i don’t have wonderful sentence cohesion)
but wow, im blubbering over this thread, and crying for me is reserved for movies only, NOT real life people. i can’t stand to get attached to them; like them, love em, or even have friends anymore. i pretty much refuse to. its like a cycle, i try it for a while, hate it, then leave it and retreat into myself, never to be heard of again, until (for some reason) a friend, (that i can’t for the life of me, shake off, no matter what i do) drags me out of my “cave.”

some people care about others, but i think some try hard to convince themselves they don’t…..maybe im just talking about me here? i’d like to believe we can influence eachother for better or for worse, *my reason for commenting*

also, the similarities i see from an overwhealming majority of you are making me wonder “what’s up with us” are we really different from everyone else? maybe…..maybe not. are we few highly sensitive, artistic, mentally afflicted or just various combos? i donno. but this makes me want to do something meaningful with my life, as corny as it sounds. hell, maybe film school would be the best move for me, it’d be a big way to reach people and send a message. i can’t stop caring, despite my efforts to permanently numb myself from it all, (because im rather selfish and want to feel good rather than empathize) bleh…

your posts gave me some hope, (all of you) really. one thought in particular that struck me, is ‘looking within for the answer, removing the clutter and distractions from my life, and the things i use to hurt me.’ so what i want now in life is to try to stop resisting the changes ive been craving, stop kicking myself when im down, and to trust myself again and go out there and f***ing care again and be kind! AHHH!! (and i have been making changes gradually to get my life back on track, i just feel like i fell off the wagon today, so i ended up here….thanks to google search)

i’ll leave you with my favorite/inspiring quotes, for what they’re worth!

“The only normal people are the one’s you don’t know very well.”
“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.”
“Don’t we all just really try to fake it well?”
“To be pleased with one’s limits is a wretched state.”
“We must always change, renew, rejuvenate ourselves; otherwise we harden.”
“Deeply earnest and thoughtful people stand on shaky footing with the public.”
“Every spoken word arouses our self-will.”
“Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do.”
“One can be instructed in society, one is inspired only in solitude.”
“There is nothing insignificant in the world. It all depends on the point of view.”
“What is uttered from the heart alone, Will win the hearts of others to your own.”
“Those who hope for no other life are dead even for this.”
“He who does not think much of himself is much more esteemed than he imagines.”
“Happiness is a ball after which we run wherever it rolls, and we push it with our feet when it stops.”
“He who can believe himself well, will be well.”

March 5, 2009 at 1:19 am
(177) arusha says:

My life is a mess. What is wrong I don’t know? I just know I have loads os caliber but my seniors are sitting on to and not using it. Some just use and don’t permit it to grow. They mar me down, stopping my progess. One I would like to ask that is my talent my enemy coz some just let people know what I am doing. This is killing me to death. Where do I go? what do I do? please someone help me. My contemporaries are helped by my seniors just coz they are cheeky and I am not? Is this my fault? Please help

March 15, 2009 at 4:22 pm
(178) Kassandra says:

I just typed in what is wrong with me, but I feel like that’s a game everyone including me has been playing for most of my life. I am struggling to get a diagnosis, after being seen twice by doctors and not really even beginning to explain how I feel, and being told that I need to put a lid on the past, to discard it, and move on, that I am probably not mad, or bi-polar, that the people who have seen me are convinced that they are right, right now, that I must stop trying to diagnose myself and fix myself, what do I do? Because…3 months ago, after some fairly traumatic events, light seemed to dawn over my brain, so. Am I bi-polar?! I seem to lurch from thinking I’m something different every month, week, day, hour, and something’s wrong, but. I need this to be fixed right away, I can’t spend the rest of my life doing this, there are far too many external and internal pressures. And everything that I’ve just read here makes perfect sense, all of you sound like me. And! Sorry, I have the added pressure of being told that I may be giving myself disorders, my brain is struggling with all of the universe.

March 15, 2009 at 6:22 pm
(179) CLMW2 says:

Everyday I feel like that..everyday

March 23, 2009 at 10:27 pm
(180) Brandon says:

Good thread.. it’s sad to see that there are so many people in the world that feel this way.. But it’s also always a good thing to know that you’re not alone in the way that you feel.. Thanks

March 26, 2009 at 3:06 pm
(181) Todd2351 says:

Wow… Im only 18 and have a girlfriend, good family, and plenty of friends. But I feel just as the rest of you. Im rarely myself, and im always just quiet and pretty much boring just because i have no desire to do anything. I hhave a good life, but it feels like I dont accept it for myself. So i just typed in “whats wrong…” in google and when it completed the search before i was done typing “whats wrong with me” i laughed, knowing that enough people actually need to as the same question. This is just one huge mystery, huh?

April 3, 2009 at 7:38 pm
(182) Patty Smiles says:

I dont understand depression, I mean do something new, roll down a hill, laugh for no reason, fall asleep thinking and believing tomorrow will be different, have really good slow sex, step outside your realm of comfortability and live, try to influence another, the best way to learn is to teach!!

April 5, 2009 at 3:12 am
(183) Justin says:

Wow, I did he same exact thing…
Typed “Whats wrong with me” & well…guess where I ended up. lol

This pretty much tells me I should be checked out when I can, I cant ignore that something is & has been affecting my life. & its not easy. I feel jus as many of u do…& ugh, Im sick of it. If this isnt whats wrong with me, I keep thinking that SOMETHING must be…
The way I’ve been, Im kinda hoping that I could put a label on it somehow tho. I dont like thinking its just me, & Im doing this to myself somehow. Or…like Im losing it, & Im just crazy. Maybe like everyone says, Im just lazy & unmotivated…
Its hard to tell anymore. I want to get checked, but I havent been able to with all thats been goin on lately. Also wouldnt mind trying counseling…if I could learn ANYTHING at all to help me. My mom already asked if I want to go to some sort of counseling…
& I said I would, but just like going to the doctor…Im unable to get there at the time.

& yes, Its true that many ppl are unsympathetic with this.
Some just cant understand unless they live it, & others…maybe they dont care enough to try understanding it. I dont know…could be many reasons.
This post seems to be helpful to alot of ppl, including me. Thanx.

April 9, 2009 at 6:33 pm
(184) Aishling says:

Do you suppose its because we`re human and we suffer the human condition? I typed the same as all of you…we`re all the same maybe everyone is…?wouldn`t it be wonderful if we all realised this and ended all the hate in the world and filled it with understanding and peace instead?

April 12, 2009 at 11:20 pm
(185) Grace says:

I 182nd that. My life happens, and I do have moments of joy, but my baseline is forever low. I can’t understand why I would be like this when I am so fortunate. Its nice to know I’m not the only one on this island.

April 16, 2009 at 12:15 pm
(186) NooneCares says:

yea i also typed in what is wrong with me, found this place, but i just dont understand how the typing sounds happy to have found others as miserable as i am. it seems fake. it made me angry and even more depressed (i could only read to comment 120, i couldnt stand it). personally i hope u are faking. to know that others ARE as messed up as i am, its nerve-racking! we may have the same symptoms but i dont feel like u do. im still as depressed as when i first started the search, if not more. im obviously lookin in the wrong place for help. well… …here’s to suicide! cheers!

April 16, 2009 at 1:50 pm
(187) GoingToKillMyselfNow says:

I kind of feel cheated by all of these comments. I was looking for answers, but got more questions. I feel like so many of you do, but I almost didn’t write because honestly, no one cares. The next person will probably write a similar comment as yours, and so on. No one will get any answers, or help of any kind. At the end of the day, I will still feel depressed, and alone. What’s the point really? I told my husband I need help, but I don’t think he’ll ever do anything about it. I don’t want to live like this.

April 17, 2009 at 9:59 am
(188) need help says:

I am lost and thought I was found but I was wrong. Funny how the little things that our lives are built on can come and effect you years later. I never believed that and I still have doubts. I am the normal one and the others aren’t…that is what I have always believed. I have god in my life and know him dearly but that doesn’t release me from being human prone to errors and problems like anyone else. Why do I seek attention when i have an amazing life?? Why would I ever be so low to look to another besides my spouse?? WHY? I am destroying something beautiful that I cannot stop!!! Please don’t try to tell me that nothing is wrong with me, I am not medicated and don’t know if i should be…but that still doesn’t get passed the fact that something is and could be drastically wrong with everyone on the forum.

April 17, 2009 at 10:34 am
(189) bipolar says:

So many people in anguish here. How many of you have sought help for your depression? There IS help available. Talk to your doctor. A pastor. A hotline. If you are working, your company may have an Employee Assistance Program which is free and confidential. EAP can refer you to someone you can afford for counseling. Don’t assume you have to live like this!

Marcia
About.com Guide to Bipolar Disorder

April 21, 2009 at 12:27 pm
(190) Tight Pants says:

It is quite positive that suicide is in my future!!!

April 21, 2009 at 2:32 pm
(191) Just Me says:

Ok, This may sound weird but it has worked for me I have finally found out what is wrong. Im ok now it was my hormones Having an orgasum a day will help! Or just when you feel down. I am serious it works! Atleast for me it does. Take care and hope this helps all.

April 21, 2009 at 2:38 pm
(192) Just me says:

Dont think bad of me for saying that I wouldnt lie and its just nature. And it helps. It takes alot of stress off gets your energy up and brightens your day. I thought about how I felt when I was younger and I realized I was happy when I did more. So just give it a shot when you start feeling down tired and just plan awful even if you dont feel like it do it. afterwords your body will thank you.

April 22, 2009 at 1:36 pm
(193) butterfly_ribs says:

my body is covered in scars from years of self abuse yet ive never suffered tragedy or been caused any harm. the only way i can ease the sadness is by making myself bleed and feelin pain. i feel selfish ugly and utterly worthless. all i feel is sadness and the desire to end it all.

April 23, 2009 at 12:15 am
(194) Me says:

Months later I type in, “What is wrong with me?” and once again I end up here. I had forgotten I had been here before until I clicked the link. I suppose next time I should type, “What is STILL wrong with me?” It’s nice knowing I’m not alone in the way that I feel, but I’ve always known that there’s people suffering the same fate as myself. I suppose it’s not all that comforting once I think about it, because I ache for anyone that feels this way. I wouldn’t wish it upon my worst enemy.

I’ve survived suicide attempts.
I was a drug addict.
I was raped.
I lost friends to murder and suicide.
I lost friends to disease.
I watched my mother die from cancer.
I lost my brother to drugs.
I’m losing my father because he lost his son and his wife.
I’m married to my best friend who I love, but I feel like he doesn’t even want me anymore.
I’m chronically ill and in pain.
I can’t have children and I wish with all my heart that I could.
All I think about is dying.
I live in a world inside my head and as lonely as it is, I don’t know where else to go to feel even remotely normal.

I know life isn’t perfect and have always known that. But why is there still so much pain after so many years? I’m almost 30 and and still feel like that little mentally unstable and confused teenager that I used to be? Helpless. Hopeless. That’s me. If it’s not one thing, it’s always another.

April 23, 2009 at 4:37 am
(195) julia says:

I KNOW!!!!
its so weird, u feel like u are looking through these cloudy goggles and youre walking through this cloudy world. I know im am ever so lucky to have what i have got but i just cant feel happy like im supposed to. its like i just woke up one day and this totally different person emerged into the world and the old me has gone forever.
all you and i can do is hope and believe that that person will come back one day. stay strong

April 23, 2009 at 6:39 am
(196) Kimberly says:

Life just plain sucks. I have been going through this for years, and it hasnt gotten any better. I dispise myself, and have given up looking for any kind of companionship…I have a trail of failed marraiges and my trust has been destroyed. I dont believe anyone can have good intentions when they meet me..I always get hurt, though I try not to. Im not playing the victim, I cant stand that….I just want to know why I hate myself so much, and cant find happiness. I dont like crowds, I always think people look at me like Im from another planet, and dont belong in society. Ive gone the route of meds, even had ECT therapy…nothing works. All my kids are now gone and living their own lives….I just hope they dont inherit whatever demons I have. I just want to die…my greatest wish is to die. I even had a gun in my hand about 3 months ago, but had no bullets, and then didnt have the guts to do it….I wish I had.

May 1, 2009 at 7:51 am
(197) zigzag says:

hmm i also typed what is wrong with me into google still havnt found the answer tho i selfharm with no hope of stopping my life is a mess with mentally ill parents who i hate with every inch of my life! yet when people ask me how i am i tell them im fine and they believe me! i always hav random mood swings and a RLY short temper and suicide is ALWAYS on my mind what is wrong with me? ill be googling it all night

May 7, 2009 at 12:54 pm
(198) ACompleteUnknown says:

I have always thought about suicide. I have bipolar but I look so normal that I can blend in with “real people” easily but I can’t relate to them and I feel like a “spy in another country.”
I will never get married and never have kids because I despise this world and would never want to bring another life into it because I wish I wasn’t. So what is the point with going on with these endless string of days?

I have been to therapists and on meds off and on my whole life and it doesn’t work. The only person in my life who truly could understand me and had true integrity was my Mom and she died of cancer 4 years ago. Since then my life has gone to shit.
The rest of my family does not understand depression at all and they just mock me. It crushes my soul.
I think I am going to sell everything for whatever I can get and wander through Latin America for a few years. My heart is telling me to do it. I need a new spark or inspiration. I just can’t keep going to a job I hate everyday.
I daydream constantly about killing myself. I went on for years hoping it was just a phase and it would go away, but it is clear that it never will.
It is funny how I look so normal and intelligent to everyone else but they can’t see the black death that engulphs me.
My family says I just need God and church but they are so full of shit. I am more Christ-like than they will ever be. They are a bunch of frauds and it disgusts me so much.
Thanks for listening, sorry if I brought you down. But I am glad to be able to relate to so many people. Thanks alot.

May 7, 2009 at 8:35 pm
(199) alone_ says:

exactly how i feel… id give anything to feel normal

May 10, 2009 at 10:46 pm
(200) Kyle says:

I dont understand how everyone is feeling so alone when there are clearly so many people who share the same problems..

However i am not depressed.. anymore at least..

I feel like i have something to share with the world and its struggling violently inside me but i cannot let it out.. yet somehow.. this is my fault..

Unfortunately i feel this thread is not really doing anything.. no ones problems are solved and no one is really reading anyone else’s posts merely just waiting there turn to speak..

Thats the problem with people.. i hate that in its most fundamental form i am the same as so many others..

i cant be..

im sorry and i actual do hope you find the answers your looking for..

One things for sure.. that it isn’t gonna be on the internet.

Take care all.

KWahDB

May 12, 2009 at 7:05 am
(201) Snrof says:

Google, like so many others led me here. It’s bizzare “What is wrong with me”
Honestly. I have nothing to be remotely unhappy about. I have times when im fine, yet others when I completely crash for a few days. I tried locking myself in my room and pretending I wasnt there today just to escape from something unknown. sad thing is , I’ll read back on this in a few days and probably hate myself for typing it

May 21, 2009 at 12:41 pm
(202) Danielle says:

Ok so i searched the same thing and ended up here….I have been feeling like this since 16, i am about to be 23 …..i went through a stage of being withdrawn from everyone…..i had a few good friends at school,really couldnt stand the stuck up people,so i would rather stay away.So for the majority of high school my parents let me stay home and study on my own.I USE to cut myself to help me feel a little better,to let me know that i was still alive,i get angry and shake,i get worried and shake + my hands and feet get cold and numb i feel like my heart is about to bloody explode,i dont know what the hell is wrong with me.My whole view on life is pretty much pessimistic,i find it hard putting my faith in people because i know they let you down,what if i dont want to be let dowN?It’s hard to get to sleep without thinking of bad things that may happen,so i almost always go to bed crying.I know that i am a good person,very nice and ppl can ususally tell….unless im completely pissed off.I think the world sucks,alot of ppl are nasty,filthy,evil individuals and i find it hard living in a world with ppl like that.My family is awesome,my fiance is also,but i cant egt it out of my head that he will screw up things.I want to know why it is hard to guarantee someone that you wouldnt hurt them in a way that they couldn’t handle.I have too many thoughts in my head,and they are mostly negative,i over analyse everything also, and i bitch when i feel unhappy.i wonder why can i be so good to someone and get treated like shit in return.where is the respect and love that ppl should have for eachother.This is a sad world….and my patience is running low.I feel like a part of me is missing and i don’t know how to get that happy me back…i feel broken.Oh and alot of ppl said oh i did stuff for atention,and i have nothing to be unhappy about and so on,but apparently they don’t understand how i feel.My emotions are apparently alot more dominant than alot of peoples.My fiance tells me to jus simply control it,i ask god ona daily basis to make it that easy.I am an extremely sensitive person and you know what maybe that isnt as bad as it seems.I feel alot for humans….i have a huge heart and i know it,and i always see the best before the worst in people.I am someone who will give money to a vagrant at the side of the road(where someone will say they will go buy drugs with that so im not giving)……i always seem to notice the saddest person in a room and fluctuate toward them …to talk to them and try to make them feel better(others simply wouldn’t be bothered,When i see a child crying i try to make them stop.I get so angry when people treat eachother bad,we ae here to give and love oneanother.That s all i can think about now maybe ill put another note sometime,oh yeh i saw a psychiatrist and he said i needed to keep my mind occupied….so maybe u guys need to also,cuz it keeps us from thinking!!oh and by the way i have an extremely creative side,i love art,language,designing anything really and i am into psycology.im sure alot of u here like stuff like that

May 21, 2009 at 5:02 pm
(203) Ann says:

I had no idea. I just typed the big question into Google and here you all are. I have no idea what to do now. I always feel like part of me is missing. My life is perfect, but I’m an outsider in my own life. I have everything I need to be content except what ever part of me is gone. Thank you, all of you.

May 25, 2009 at 10:20 am
(204) megan says:

hi i really need help!
and i need someone who has bipolar to help me out with this… i see a psychologist and psychiatrist, ive been tested for adhd but tested negative, i personally dont believe everything needs a label but im sure i fit the description of bipolar, im always depressed and when someting good happens i look for the negatives all the time, my mood changes 24/7 one minuite im happy to go out, next ill change my mind and get anxious, i find myself talking to myself and getting very angry and start hitting something,
im very pessimistic when ive slept alot ill still get tired, my energy will be drained
im always fidgeting or using my hands to fidget, what is wrong with me?
please help i need a direct answer

May 26, 2009 at 5:57 pm
(205) Ali Xavier Dalvi says:

I googled “What is wrong with me”, and it lead me here.
Yeah it does feel good seeing a lot of people here with the same problem.
good luck to everyone.

May 27, 2009 at 1:34 am
(206) Michelle says:

I feel exactly like you people. I dont know what is wrong with me. Have a great family awesome career good friends. Why am I so down all the time?!?!

May 27, 2009 at 7:55 pm
(207) scott says:

i have my days when just nothing feels like its going my way and i feel like im just running in circles and im going no where and i feel like i just want to break down and cry

May 28, 2009 at 6:05 pm
(208) Talika says:

I typed in ‘whats wrong with me’ and this site is what was came up on my screen. You don’t know how relieved i was to read that comment. I to have what most people see as a good quality life but am unhappy. I feel guilty for being miserable, i have a loving mum dad and partner, 3 beautiful dogs a department of housing house but i just can’t be happy. people around me don’t understand why i’m down so it was great to find a site where people understand how i feel.

May 28, 2009 at 7:47 pm
(209) Ash says:

Its so nice to know that there are so many ppl like me who have everything that you need to be happy.. yet there is something that keeps nagging… usually these things are very small… yet they affect me a great deal n spoil my entire day sometimes… things like ppl not paying attention to me, giving more attention to my friends etc… and if you analyse these ppl should not even matter to me.. yet they do… n a great deal… aarghhh.. i hate this abt myself… :-(

June 3, 2009 at 10:45 pm
(210) Jack says:

DAMMIT!

So I typed in “What’s wrong with me?” just like everybody else and would up here. Doing some reading. Yup sounds like me.

Then there’s always got to be some born-again waste of my air who has to chime in with the old, “I was miserable, too, and then the Magic Invisible Man in the Sky straightened me out and now life is rainbows and giggly bunnies shoot right out of my butt-hole, Praise Him.”

Stop.

Seriously.

Just. F***ing. Stop.

June 4, 2009 at 4:53 pm
(211) loser says:

wow.i’m so happy i found this page. i really dont know what the heck is wrong with me. im always sad when there’s nothing to be sad about. and it seems i’ll never find happiness. what a loser i am :(

June 6, 2009 at 2:16 am
(212) rk says:

This does suck. I’ve been dealing with it for the past 3 1/2 years. I’m not bi-polar, but I have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder. I’ve been on meds and gone to some therapists… but it never seems to help. It just seems pointless when you feel so incapable of thinking or feeling anything positive. You think one negative thought during a day and its all down hill from there. Things that really should make you happy just don’t anymore, and it’s true, you feel like a total burden to anyone you talk to. It’s gotten to the point where my best friends for years don’t seem to want to be around me because they feel like I’m just trying to compare how “bad” my life is to theirs, and that’s not it. So I often just seclude myself so they don’t have to deal with me because I sure wouldn’t want to, even if they do say they don’t mind. I’m just trying to vent, trying to relieve some of these terrible feelings. I know that’s what the therapist is supposed to be for but it seems so fake. Like your just another patient… its pointless. Which through a series of thoughts makes me feel like my life is pointless. And here I go again, for another year(s) feeling this way. When will it end? I ask myself this very often, and never find the answer. I feel empty. I actually feel bad saying I’m glad I’m not alone in this, simply because no one should have to feel this way, yet we do. Somehow I hope this makes me stronger later in life seeing as I’m only 18, but seriously how much can a body take? But I am glad that there are people out there that actually understand. Funny thing is I’m too ashamed of this and feel so bad for feeling like this I won’t even put my name on it.

June 8, 2009 at 10:16 am
(213) Lisa says:

Jack… that was so funny!! seriously, you cheered me right up. a good laugh always helps. Thank you!!

June 8, 2009 at 11:11 am
(214) Paul says:

Damn it all there’s anger here
My quiet face
My desperate fear
No one sees what lurks below
Their ignorance but helps it grow

I feel like this half of my waking life. I obsess over it to the point where I legitametally suspect that I have some mental condition. Have not all of you felt it? That something is wrong; with us, with the world, with our ethics, our morals, our very existence. We are a modern generation of pseudo-romantisized children, sired by mass media’s reckless perception of reality.
I don’t know how much of that made sense, but I cannot say it has no merit. That knowlege alone, distances me from my peers, much like Mary in the previous post said that her other self made her unable to identify with her roommates.
Still, I retain a nagging question, which is wrong? Am I the cog that doesn’t quite fit, or was the machine never supposed to have existed in the first place?

June 13, 2009 at 12:28 am
(215) BrAnDy says:

I typed in the same question. I unfortunately have felt this way since I was a kid. I have been on a few anti-depressants, but I do not like the way they make me feel. I also do not like having to depend on something that is supposed to make me feel better. So, I just try to ignore it…

June 14, 2009 at 12:27 pm
(216) Sun says:

Tell yourself: I am valuable. I am loved. Hopefully I will recognize this one day. To “loser”, you are no such thing even if u feel that way that doesn’t mean it’s valid. When times get rough (I have drug addict siblings)I think about the good surprises life has given me and think there has to be more goog things coming. Why would life just stop? Then I come to this forum and realize I am not as alone as I think; we are all trying to figure this thing out. So just when I want to give up I think there must be more. And there is someone/something that wants us to succeed, to evolve. We can’t quit. Don’t quit. I’m not.
gets

June 15, 2009 at 9:52 am
(217) Chase says:

I don’t know what my problem is. I am married to a great woman, but I want to have sex with other women. At a minimum I just want women to touch me, I want to touch them. It just sucks to live wanting something an never being willing to get it because of conflicting morals. I’ve gone to counceling and taken meds, but none of it really helps. I’m trying to find a healthy way to deal with this.

June 15, 2009 at 9:38 pm
(218) Willow Rose says:

I once read,
“It is no measure of health to fit into a sick society”
I can’t remember where the quote is from, but i guess thats just another google away.

I feel empty. Lonely and broken. Just like every each one who has left a comment above, and the hundreds more who have slipped through cyberspace, reading but leaving no comment.

I am no anarchist but i feel sometimes that it cant be me, it cant be us who have something inherently wrong, it’s the way we live. The how instead of the what.

so maybe we are just asking the wrong question . . .

June 16, 2009 at 2:09 am
(219) d-rock says:

It’s amazing how many people are on the same page (literally)

I myself have been dealing with bouts of depression for years. I’ve asked a lot of questions to myself, including “what is wrong with me?”

Sometimes, I’m perfectly fine. The life of the party. But other times, I don’t say a word. I just sit, thinking about how much better my life could be and should be. My friends think it’s funny, sometimes jokingly calling me “emo”, though I’m not in the least bit. I start taking what they say seriously, often replaying the things they say in my head. I start wondering if they are even my friends.

The sad thing is, I know when the depression comes back. It’s happened so many times before, it feels second nature. Like I’m never going to be happy.

I know I should get it looked at, but I don’t want to tell anyone out of fear of being called “weak” or a “burden”. So I’ve just grown a strong will to fight the depression. But sometimes even the strongest of wills needs a helping hand…

June 16, 2009 at 2:37 am
(220) d-rock says:

And Kyle (197), I have read nearly all of the posts. And it does help to read them. This is NOT a completely useless forum. It’s great to start opening up, even if it’s only on the internet =P

June 16, 2009 at 2:50 pm
(221) Jeff C says:

I’m in the same boat. My problem is severe depression. I have been seeing a therapist every week for the past year. I also take Lexapro. Still feeling lousy. I wonder everyday if I will ever get better. Just want to give up on life. Each day is a struggle to just get out of bed. Very difficult to look forward to anything. I can’t remember the last time I even laughed. I try to resign myself to the fact that this is the way it is and to just get used to it. Good luck all, I know how you feel.

June 17, 2009 at 5:04 pm
(222) Natalie x says:

I Feel Like That All The Time And I Hate It :(
What Is Wrong With Mee ??

June 17, 2009 at 5:29 pm
(223) laurie50 says:

why do i feel like this when i havea boyfriend tht loves me a beautiful baby girl n i still feel as if i am worthless n i still binge n make myself sick at ant opitunity why cnt i just be happy? xxxx

June 23, 2009 at 8:28 pm
(224) Pam says:

I can’t make friends. I have no friends, I am alone…I can socialize pretty well when I’m working with people, but get to scared to get close, I just don’t want them to want to be friends with me because I have the feeling I will disappoint them, I have nothing to give, and as soon as they’d realize that they’d give up on me and that would hurt worse. So I avoid it and dread it but feel so pathetic and alone.
I have a boyfriend and I am surprised he enjoys my company and always fear that he’ll discover how empty I am. At least I am glad I have my family, they love in any case.
I also typed What’s wrong with me in Google.
I don’t know what it is, and the worse is I think I’m too scared to do something about it.

June 30, 2009 at 5:20 pm
(225) adam says:

I used to feel really depressed, constantly running awful (AWFUL!) scenarios in my mind, hating myself, thinking it wasn’t worth saving myself because ‘who cares if I’m depressed anyway’, I don’t deserve love, etc. Somewhere along the line I thought enough was enough, I’ll fake it until it’s real, I’ll only think positive, go for a massive walk to tire me out and so on, and to a certain extent it worked. But if I’m honest, I think all I’ve done is bury whatever it was inside of me, and everything on the outside of that is just numb, it’s hard to explain. I don’t think I’ll ever get rid of it, it’s like I’m being attacked from a different dimension. I’m even reading about quantum physics and alternative sciences in the hope of a realization of what it really is. I dunno, I think we’re all connected somehow and all the bad stuff in the world is picked up by certain people, feeling the worlds pain, like we’re just a small part of a giant organism that’s ill, we just don’t realise we’re feeling it on an empathic level? Do I sound crazy?! I’m not religious or anything, but the world is fucked and being undeniably connected to it, we’re fucked too, which kinda inspires me to try to save the world, until I’m beaten down by own doubts and misery again. I could type for ages with all the theories and thoughts I have on this subject, but you’re probably thinking I’m mental so I’ll just leave it. But yeah, I typed ‘what’s wrong with me?’ in Google too, ended up here, so thanks for being depressed with me I guess, at least we’ve made each other smile?

July 4, 2009 at 2:35 am
(226) angela says:

weird…I just typed the same thing into google. Great minds think alike, huh? Adam, I don’t think you sound mental or crazy. You remind me of myself, in that I analyze things to death, trying to find an answer. I always come up with a thousand ideas on any given problem. I can research endlessly. But I agree, the world is fucked, and I too want to save it. I don’t know if I become overwhelmed or what, but I always beat myself down too, and talk myself out of whatever great idea I once had, and the excitement just leaves me. And that starts the downward spiral again. And as far as “being attacked from a different dimension”, I can totally relate! It just doesn’t feel right. As a side note, burying your emotions is addressed often in the forums at tmshelp.com. Anxiety, stress, depression…it’s all evil and can eventually hurt us physically, in addition to the emotional/mental hell we already experience. Blah. We need to be in control of ourselves; not some alternate dimension or insignificant person who happens to float through our life.

July 7, 2009 at 1:32 am
(227) sarah says:

I can relate to so much of what everyone is saying. And I agree that it just helps to hear other people say what you are also thinking and feeling on a daily basis. And someone did say something that I think helps. About doing things that can make us a little happier, a little better, a little more sane and alive. Little things like things we love that make us happy, even if it is sueperficial. Rock climbing, hiking, being with good friends, the ocean, good food, etc. Thanks to everyone for sharing.

July 7, 2009 at 8:08 am
(228) yash says:

Neither am feeling uncanny nor soothened. i just feel i belong nowhere. i work for a software firm and i’m afraid i find my job is an abbhorance to me. i always wanted to be some kind of artist, only not to find any support from my folks. now i cant even walk away from my job n start all over,because of the so called “responsiblities”. i feel pathetic about my life(no, never contemplating killing myself). Now a days i live the notion i am wasting my life. I want to run away from this crazy civilization and perk myself up in a serene and isolated place.Himalayas!.

July 8, 2009 at 4:24 am
(229) m1dge says:

just over 6 months ago i was diagnosed with major depressive disorder and social anxiety disorder, although I’ve been prescribed medication I still feel like there is something not right with me, as the problems that I were having are now returning and i honestly do not know what is wrong with me
and im not sure what to do. It just seems like everyone around me doesn’t notice me, even though i have heaps of mates, i hate the way i look, feel, speak, even the person i am. oh and im 18 aswel, i think the best bet for me would be to so to the doctors again and try to sort something, after reading a few of these comments it really is good to know that i’m not the only one out there that feels the way i do.

July 8, 2009 at 12:19 pm
(230) rex says:

what a population of my kind. kinda feels great. i m not alone. do you people have boyfriends or girlfriends. Somebody u can rely on or say things which are darkest of secrets or thoughts or fears. do u feel u will be rejected. are u unpredictable. people like being around u, come to u for help but u cannot go to anybody. people dont trust u with important things. u screw up most important things in life . never really happy with whats going on. just rallying the the life.Isnt it . Join the club. lets party!!!

July 16, 2009 at 4:34 am
(231) Ty says:

I guess this is a good way to express feelings.. I feel the same as the majority of you. I don’t know why I feel this way, i’m 21 and i’ve worked and achieved pretty much everything a 21 year old would want. I’m a vain person when it comes to myself and I like to turn heads I guess.. I feel like i’m stuck.. I want to change who I am. I’m not an uptight person, I get along with everyone. I find myself going out and putting on a fake smile everywhere I go. It’s weird saying this for a guy but I feel like just breaking down and crying sometimes. I feel as if i’m slowely exploding from the inside out. I find myself trying to dumb myself down and not think about anything at all when I go out anywhere.. like a zombie. I may have the ‘appearance’ that I may fit into social gatherings but they really are the last place I want to be. I always feel as if people are judging me or thinking bad things about me. I never really feel at ease in my own skin. I wouldn’t talk to a therapist because I can’t express my feelings to a person who I don’t know and am not close too and even people who I am close to seem to get uninterested and don’t want to hear it. It’s not like i’m getting sappy on them, i’m just talking. These feelings may also be caused by the fact I have feelings for members of both sex’s stronger for the wrong side than the other.. I don’t want to be like that but can’t help it.. it really isn’t choice. I’ve distanced myself from all relationships because I wouldn’t want to hurt the other person because of the way I am. I don’t think there is a pill that could help fix me.. There’s alot more I could say but I don’t want to ramble on too much

July 17, 2009 at 12:09 am
(232) Petere says:

…… and yet another one who never thought I would ever be here. Yep, think there is something wrong with me! Something makes me want to just stay in bed, nothing worth getting up for and why am I here sort of feelings and why should I stay in this wold. I just dont want to talk to anyone and can find fault with everyone except myself. I am a 56 y.o male, successful business, great kids, a lifestyle that is envied yet I keep kicking myself up the arse about myself. I dont feel as though I have achieved anything. Outwardly, I am a contented, happy guy. I avoid people and while I am writing this am thinking to myself why I am doing it. It has been a day now, am sick of having these “episodes” as I know I am being and look ridiculous. I have the most understanding, loving GF and will not even talk to her or let her get in under the “cave door”. I lock myself up and just feel that there is no point so wont bother, then I kick out of it and really feel ridiculous. I wont get “help”, I am a very self reliant, strong type and would view myself as failing because of that weakness. It is ok for some people but I could never do that.
I know what my actions do to others and dont feel good about it. I had an unhappy childhood with lots of criticism and very little encouragement.
Thanks to everyone here, I probably would never have ever written this unless I had read these posts and writing has probably helped me a bit. I would never tell anyone of my thoughts about myself but now that I know this website, will be asking those I love and hurt (occasionally) to read it. It may help them but then I dont understand why someone would want to help me!

July 22, 2009 at 9:24 pm
(233) nobody says:

u hate urself so much ur head hurts.wanna scream wat the hell is wrong wit u at ur reflection in the mirror. your the runt, the one thats der but never noticed, often forgotin.u think if i died i wouldnt be too pissed off about it just make it quick but ud never hurt ur family like that. for sum reason they still luv u. plus u would really like to know why u feel no emotions, at a friends funeral and feel nothin, well maybe a bit sorry for everyone who is crumbeling around you but wers the greef.WERS THE TEARS. am i dead inside. plus u got the things other people have mentioned which was a slight comfort to me to know it is not just me. the feeling of being stuck in a rutt,being angry, frustrated, annoyed or sumthin like that im not sure which it is or is it a combo of them its just this “rraawwa” felling ya know.you want to be alone away from everyone.its less confusing. but then again ur scared to be alone incase ur never accepted back. i could go on but i might be gettin off the point i dont know if this is the right forum for wat i am. hehe mayb cause i dont know wat i am. in a way i hope u didnt read this.if u did i have takin up too much of ur time already.

July 24, 2009 at 9:07 am
(234) Janine says:

I think there’s something wrong with me because nobody loves or cares for me and I don’t have anyone to spend my holidays with. I’m a nice girl, so obviously SOMETHING is WRONG :///

July 25, 2009 at 2:12 am
(235) Barney says:

I’m unique. I want to be left alone.

July 28, 2009 at 1:27 pm
(236) George says:

haha its funny because i though i was the only feeling like this but today i typed in google randomly ” whats wrong with me ” and i got here and i readed all you comments and for the first time i feel like im not alone ” in my feeling “

July 29, 2009 at 3:57 pm
(237) Somebody says:

…Wow.

July 30, 2009 at 12:40 pm
(238) albert says:

let me tell you that once upon a time i felt exactly like you feel to day, but i dont feel anymore, i understand perfect how you feel but let me try to tell you my own experience several years ago i was complety wasting out of work and down and all inside was so frustrating at the point that i wanted die i just didn´t know what i wished from this confused life a lot of girls liked me but i was so shy around girls and please belive me i was so stupid couse i couldn´t enjoyed my jouth my stupids thoughts didn´t allow me to make a living as anyother joung boy and then my stupid life started but now i know that i can be happy and we all are able to make the kind of living that we all wish just let me give you a hint when you feel so bad just think about tha people unblessed like all those who are in the midle of a war or something worse it works good to me and you will find an answer for your questions i´m sure about it bye.

July 31, 2009 at 3:49 pm
(239) Something wrong with me... says:

I feel so alone and isolated, like I have absolutely no friends. I hardly ever feel happy. I am either O.K. or an absolute terrible mess. I don’t know what it is, but I seem to be wearing people repellent. I am a very nice, accepting person and I am actually pretty decent looking; well, not ugly anyways. So what is it? Is it just me? I always feel excluded and isolated from everything social around me, and that people like to keep their distance. I only feel good when I feel loved, which is very rare for me. I also just lost a bunch of weight recently, and, while it has given me some more confidence to socialize, I still feel apart and it’s killing me. The emotions are terrible. I haven’t been ecstatic in a long time, but boy have I sunk and hit rock bottom. No matter what I do, nobody seems to like me, and, even if some do, I still feel like crap so it makes no difference. No I drink a lot… by myself… just to feel better. I just want friends and happiness, but my life won’t give me anything. I wish I wasn’t born. I have been in pain my whole life and it just isn’t worth it. There is no escape for me. I know I don’t have it in me to actually kill myself, but I think about it all the time. And how nobody would care and nobody but my family would go to my funeral. Hopefully I will get cancer to shorten this sucky life.

August 1, 2009 at 3:00 pm
(240) kat says:

Wow, this is the closest I’ve ever come to not feeling completely alone. This thread has been going on for two years… strange how we all got here by asking google(!) the same basic question.

I honestly don’t remember not feeling this way- my earliest memories (age 4 or 5) are asking my mother what happens when we die, if we still hurt, if we are still lonely, or if it all goes away. Over 20 years later, I still ask myself the same question. I think I’ve always thought this feeling would go away, that my situation would change and I would finally be happy like everyone else. But now I’m almost 30- I went to school for something I love, I have a home, friends, I’ve made peace with my family, and I finally have a partner who I love more than anything. But still, I have this emptiness inside. Sometimes I feel like I’m trapped in a jar… I can see and hear people, I can respond to their questions and stories, but I feel separated from them. I have this crushing feeling that nothing matters, that we are all just wasting time. Part of me wants my friends and family to hate me, so I won’t hurt them when they find out I can never be happy. I constantly dream about killing myself, but could never do it (I’ve lost a sibling and have seen the aftermath)… instead I just hope to find out I have cancer, or something else that wouldn’t be my fault. Or I wish that something catastrophic would happen and EVERYTHING would end. My partner has started talking about children, but I think I would be a terrible mother. I don’t want anyone to depend on me when I don’t even want to be here. The last few years have been the most difficult, because I can only come to the conclusion that it will always be this way.

When famous people, rock stars, etc, commit suicide, people are always shocked. They always say “they had so much, they were at the top of the world, how could they do this?”. It has always made perfect sense to me. They saw the view from the top, and it looked exactly the same as the view from the bottom. They finally realized that nothing changes… the emptiness is inside them, impervious to any outside influences. This has been the hardest thing for me to accept, but I’m just trying to take it day by day. I can only try to hold on to a thread of hope that one day I’ll look back at this darkness, and be thankful that I kept going.

August 2, 2009 at 1:28 am
(241) bonnie says:

#238 using google like a magic eight ball. seems to me, if there are so many of us here wondering whats wrong with us, maybe the answer is… nothing???seems were all the same here. maybe there are 6 billion more wondering the same. or maybe we’re the sane ones. i like to think this feeling is a reasonable reaction to an unreasonable situation. if life were booze im drinking it 200 proof, how bout you. here’s to all of us, bottoms up. hiccup.

August 10, 2009 at 11:03 am
(242) Billy Joe says:

“What’s wrong with me?” must be the magic phrase for all of us. I feel like this too. I randomly typed this in google, and now I know why. It gives me a bit of hope to know that I’m really not alone. But it truly saddens me that I could never give a good explanation.

August 11, 2009 at 7:22 pm
(243) cmunk says:

bipolar? there was a kid at my school who had that and he hit people a lot. that doesnt sound like me!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
help!!!
cmunk

August 11, 2009 at 7:28 pm
(244) cmunk says:

bipolar? there was a kid at my school who had that and he hit people a lot. that doesnt sound like me!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
i looked it up some more and it said thoughts of suicide, hallucinations, and disconnection from the world. i dont think thats me. im gonna keep looking.
cmunk

August 12, 2009 at 8:59 pm
(245) dean says:

i have bi polar only got dignased with it a few months ago it was horrible i still feel like i need to get out of this whole thing.

August 13, 2009 at 3:04 am
(246) David says:

Curiosity and self evaluation have led to me to type “what’s wrong with me” as well… (praise Google eh). I took the time to read each of these heartfelt messages, two years worth (wow), and truly feel hurt from the pain in each one. I know of the vivid Hell our perceptions can create and the past afflictions in which we must overcome at the same time in order to overcome today, everyday.
To spill a bit of mine own story; I grew up in a violent setting, frequently moving and quite frankly-never knowing much of an innocent youth. I suffered from sever hallucinations since a child but was never treated. Around the age of eight, my parents divorced and even more pressure arose along with the stresses of responsibility to shield my younger sister from the fighting and immaturity of our parents. Such violence, stresses, and hallucinations helped solidify my place amidst indifference and “I don’t belong here, on Earth,” which has been more of a neutral friend than anything. Call it a comfort zone, but its no more comforting than it is painful. Finally, during my Jr. and high school years- I was pushed and pushed to see some psychologists, and eventually did. They both loaded me up with medications and diagnosis’ of; severe depression, bi-polar disorder, and triggered schizophrenia(schizoaffective disorder)… whatever, I refused to take the prescribed medication because of their affect upon who I was as a person. All in all I didn’t want to be robotic and didn’t give a shit about myself enough to stay on a regiment of medications to help myself. At about the age of seventeen, I attempted an overdose on oxycontin and xanex, yet woke up in a mixture of my sweat and vomit… Believe it or not- I tried it again when I was eighteen (ambien, oxycontin) and came to with my mother atop of my chest.
Now, I do not have faith in religion, nor do I find it to be what “should be”. However, if it gives people hope and happiness then.. right on. But, I do believe in God. I felt a spirit which wasn’t mine at a very early age and what I saw that morning as I woke to see my Mother has indeed changed my perspective on life. The pain and spiritual/mental troubles have actually grown, and I battle every day to find a reason to sleep at night. Before I attempted my first overdose, I was writing/performing music with my band and still am to this day. The lessons I’ve learned from such haunting experiences and stories I’ve listened to from people like; you, I… US, have inspired me and my band to write our first full length album which is a detailed and in-depth look at these such spiritual/mental trials in which we face today. After two years, our album is nearly finished-engineering is the next step. It’s been my blessing to have a true outlet and to know that I too am not alone… Im part of the PEOPLE WHO KNOW WHAT”S UP:) and I hope anyone of you reading this can find that outlet of your own. Fuck being sappy, but I know great things can come from our inner Hell’s. And I truly hope you can trust what I’ve said. Listen to what your insides are telling you, not your head..

Peace All,
David

August 14, 2009 at 8:14 pm
(247) Marie says:

I typed in what’s wrong with me because that’s just basically what I wonder all the time. I’m a small town middle class girl who has never even been through anything that bad. I have a wonderful family that would do anything for me and a boyfriend that I don’t deserve. Notice I didn’t say anything about friends…I use to have a ton! But now..not so much. I’m always terrified of what people are thinking of me, if they’re judging me. I’m 21, I should have tons of friends and I should be going out all the time. I ususally just stay in my apartment. Some days are fine, I’m a happy person and a bad thought hardly enters my head. Other days..my eyes well up with tears at anything. Sometimes about 15 times during a day. I think of so many bad things that go on in the world, things that have nothing to do with me, people I don’t know or will ever meet, and I just cry. I feel ridiculous, but I have no idea what to do. I used to could go on hardly any sleep, but now I’m always tired. I just dont get it. Thank you all for making me feel like I’m not the only one feeling like I’m the only one. Good luck.

August 15, 2009 at 12:02 am
(248) Rob says:

I am here like all of us, I’m sure we all have asked ourselves to some degree, why can’t I be like that? Why me? What did I do to deserve this? Is this my fault? And of course WHATS WRONG WITH ME? This tells me its not me, IT’S US, and all the ones who haven’t left a comment. Or the ones who haven’t typed in “whats wrong with me” What about people who don’t have computers or anything? I know my life is really messed up, and I’m unable to escape from my own mind, which is my worst enemy. I feel for those who can not feel happiness, I know all to well. Just know some really get the shit end of the stick, not to take away from anyone or how they feel,or don’t feel. It’s real to us all at that moment in time.

August 15, 2009 at 5:01 am
(249) cookie says:

i feel comforted by the huge numbers of people who have typed the same search term into their PC’s. I thought i was odd, i take comfort in knowing either im not odd or there are masses of us who are equally odd and so feel the same way. some of the isolation i have felt from not knowing what is wrong with me is countered by seeing that people all over the world are sat thinking the same thing and feeling the same way.

August 16, 2009 at 1:13 pm
(250) Abrar says:

this is so true and we all here share the same mentality even i googled it ,,,,,,,,,,,,, i am loved but i still feel lonely… and frustratd feel like breaking things around…. started getting a head ache just because my girlfriend is a little busy… i think im gone nuts….. do i love her or is it just some craziness…. or i hae some sick mental disorder but guess what heavy rock is my remedy now.. bye….

August 18, 2009 at 9:05 am
(251) Maya says:

Hummm…I wanted to say something, but everything’s been said already…Although…I wonder, does anyone else feel like they’re moving through life in this big, impenetrable bubble? This isn’t normal, is it? I don’t really know what normal is meant to feel like. It’s like I’m floating around in this big whirlpool of time without any sense of which way is forward and which is back. I’m at a time in my life (with high school almost over) where I need to be thinking seriously about the future, but it’s just so hard to stay focused! Stupid thoughts like: “Before I know it, a week/month/year will have passed…then another, and another, and soon I’ll be dead,” and “What’s wrong with me(!)?” keep popping into my head. I have an idea of what I want to do with my life – I just have no clue as to how to get there! It’s the fear of failing, the feeling of falling, that scares me. Increasingly I’ve been experiencing extreme lows and highs, like many of you, and it’s exhausting! I’m scared that one day something will just snap, and I won’t be able to get out of bed in the morning.

August 27, 2009 at 5:09 am
(252) Yesenia says:

i feel this way. i typed ‘what is wrong with me’ into google search. this came up.
now, give me the answer to my question….

September 1, 2009 at 4:27 pm
(253) former says:

Stop feeling sorry for yourself. We all get that way sometimes. Get up and do something positive. Pray to God, he alone can save you.

September 2, 2009 at 1:35 am
(254) pete says:

i feel like i know all of you…in every word, the way it was typed..all the confusion we r feeling. i dont kill myself because i have this shred of hope or just morbid curiosity to see what end im given. i dont believe there is an answer to this question tho, just various ways to deal with it. drugs, sex, alcohol, fighting, pain, and on and on. shrinks want our money to give us insight, but just reading all of what you beautiful people wrote has helped me. i think we might be sensitive to life, all the little changes we feel..noticing everything, over anylizing what we see and hear, just getting overwhelmed…then whats the use….i hope more people write more..i need this…im living in motels, i havent painted in weeks..all i do is drink,…i miss myself. im bookmarking this page…

September 3, 2009 at 11:17 pm
(255) almost twenty says:

Good evening. This is so strange. This is such an old post. And it’s up to date. And there’s nothing to say because it’s all been said. You guys should have SEEN me today! I was off the wall, giggling, acting like an idiot, being happy, fake happy, erratic happy, and this evening I am down down down down. Wanting out. Wanting morning to come. Wishing I could answer… THAT question.

I know that after a good night’s sleep and a good work out and a cool shower everything is going to be okay. And I want everyone else to stick through whatever you might be feeling.

Because I also searched this question. There’s nothing WRONG with us. It is not a RIGHT or WRONG thing, because that is just moralization of feelings. But still , I don’t know what to call it.

September 3, 2009 at 11:48 pm
(256) Hip_e says:

me too…. i am pathetically emotionally fragile- what gives- anything really good or bad just makes me cry-mi hate this

September 3, 2009 at 11:51 pm
(257) hip_e says:

yah I also typed in whats wrong with me

September 4, 2009 at 12:54 am
(258) hip_e says:

I am smart,people say I am pretty/sexy/stunning/cool/strong/great public speaker I just finished college, moved into a beautiful new place, and have a wonderful lively 5 year old girl. I am healthy and have a good family- i am on welfare,I’m broke, feel like I will never get a job, and want to die- what the hell. I fantasize about crack, getting murdered, just dissolving somehow… and on the other hand I am happy, funny optimistic and carefree. I like the previous comment that said maybe we just have to cut our losses and move on, the greeks called it acedia- we call it bypolar- its this wierd deep human sadness, do we all have it???? so how do others make it and become successful, I feel like i’m losing, but I just cant give up, theres gotta be a light at the end of this tunnel. I am 31 and i have been like this since i was probably 5.

September 4, 2009 at 1:08 am
(259) hip_e says:

I agree with willow rose- except I have wondered If i am a true spanish anarchist- i do have basque blood in me. the quote – i believe is eerily true. i feel so nautious tonight, i just want relief… i get phisically ill fom this yuckiness… fevers, headache, i feel really pathetic

September 4, 2009 at 1:26 am
(260) hip_e says:

adam (222) brillient , different and insightful…

September 5, 2009 at 12:21 pm
(261) Drich1212 says:

Exercise, Exercise, Exercise….that is the solution

September 6, 2009 at 5:36 pm
(262) realwolverine says:

Today 9.6 is my Birthday….and….ALL OF THE ABOVE…#236….I relate soooo much to everything you wrote….I’m 48 today and at risk of sounding like “boasting” I’m told I look younger like in my 30′s and I’m told I’m attractive and like you said, well, not ugly…and I’m down to earth, have a good sense of humor, oh I’m boring MYSELF now (TIRED need a nap) but just couldn’t do so without leaving a post cuz I am amazed at finding all this, and someone also commented about how for over 2 yrs this is an active thread; and it is amazing how “focused” it is although the question googled and allllll the responses covers such a wide range of STUFF….ANYWAY while I hate the thought of anyone else feeling these feelings (or NOT feeling!) as trite as it may sound to some who don’t “get it” (or WON’t “get it” and worse speculate on stuff they know NOTHING about), it DOES “help” to know that I’m not a freak of nature. I’m relieved to have stumbled upon this, I didn’t type the actual “what’s wrong with me” but THAT does cover/address what I was trying to find reading material on, more specifically INDIFFERENCE of siblings friends etc., and I’m learning (the HARD way of course) to not “tell” people I feel so isolated/separate/not a part of, cuz each & every time it gets mistaken for an invitation for a bunch of “fix it” control freaks (who disguise themselves as sensitive and considerate at first till they worm their way into my space and start draining my energy then “get mad” when they AND MYSELF discover I am not a “yes” person, just cuz I don’t go around looking for conflict/confrontation becuz of “all of the above” and all it entails does not mean I want a caberet of a bunch of people descending into my life…I think that’s where I get real agoraphobic-like and don’t seem able to make a decision or even have the will to is becuz it just is “safer” to stay put? AND it comes and goes, I’ll be like “normal” and I’m told I’m fun to be around, etc etc but well I’ve rambled/babbled on enuf (I ammm tired…)but THANK YOU everyone here for everything written, I got to read more than I even intended becuz I am soooo tired (did I say that already?!) and I’m RELIEVED that I’ve bookmarked this and will come back and read more, this HELPS A LOT…beyond words (even tho I babble on, ouch eyestrain headache, THAT’ll shut me up and get me to end this post!) Thx for “listening” and THIS is my Birthday present to myself to have come across this entire thread!

September 9, 2009 at 5:05 pm
(263) cOlOrOfhOpe says:

there is nothing wrong with you… it’s just one of those bad days… go to sleep n when you’ll wake up.. you’ll find world a better place..!!

Believe me!!

September 12, 2009 at 1:46 am
(264) Cathi says:

glad I’m not the only one who googled “what is wrong with me”.

September 17, 2009 at 7:19 pm
(265) saywhat says:

I first wrote on here in March 2008 under the name Andy, I come back every few months when I remember about it, I love that it has carried on for so long, there’s something touching about that. I wanted to say that I’m a lot happier now than I was when I first wrote, I don’t feel depressed anymore and I never thought I’d get to this point, it lasted so long, a decade maybe, but it’s finally over, I still get bad days but they no longer compare to the despair I used to feel……I hope that you can get hope from what I’ve written, life can change for the better, your inner world included….

September 19, 2009 at 6:54 pm
(266) Again and Again says:

So I wonder … Typed in WWWM bcz life is turning gray, cold, beyond empty. Into a realm where what was (what used to be joyful/natural) no longer makes sense … any sense. I see the sun, the trees, the life – but it is like it exists “out there”. And what I feel “in here” is dread. I wake to dread. I attempt sleep, but dread pounds my every tho’t, releasing no ease, no peace, no sleep.
If I were 92, it might be OK. Meaning, if I were in that stage of life where release was the “thing up”. OK. Time for this stage, this process.
But these feelings have haunted me at different times thru’out my whole life. And are now getting terribly and increasingly worse – like torture.
So I read these beautiful, sad, angry, and heartfelt comments.
And I cannot help but think that “something wrong with me” is simply not true.
There is not something wrong with you (or me).
I think what is happening is we are breaking apart – I mean as a whole, as human culture – and those of us who are not thick skinned enough, FEEL IT. And it is too painful to put anywhere…to DO anything with.
It seems to me that human being is simply not meant to go at this pace, stress, speed, multiplicity. Biologically, we are very simple, simple creatures. And this world, the one we’ve created, is too much. Too much to hang on to, too much to know, too much compete for/in/with/to.
Imagine a village, 30-50 people. You know everyone. You all have a meaning, a purpose, filling a need, you belong, you can’t help but help – you are always needed. How much depression would you feel? Where and how would you find time to be depressed? Yes, there would be good and bad times, and people you would and wouldn’t like. But YOU would not be a useless entity.
What is so “depressing” in our current world is we have no purpose. No one needs us. Not really. And that feeling of purposelessness translates …all the way down to a biochemical level.
I would bet that bi-polar etc has become quantum-ly more prevalent in the last 100 years. And may not even exist in more close-knit, small societies.
I remember reading an excerpt from a talk given by the Dali Lama. A person in the audience was asking a question about self-esteem; and the translator (to the Dali Lama) was having a terrible time trying to explain/find words in Tibetan for “self-loathing/self-hatred”. And the Dali Lama simply and finally had to accept that such a thing existed – because he had never heard of or encountered such a weird/impossible idea.
Wow…
Yet that is how MOST of us live …here … in the Land of Plenty.
What if NOTHING is wrong with us ~ and we are all simply aching to be heard, felt, seen, and needed? Needed as human beings.
Simple as human being.
Able to respond to a life simple enough to understand.
No longer overwhelmed, and under-needed.

September 20, 2009 at 5:13 pm
(267) Kate says:

hya…i am only 17 i dont know what to feel…i dont know what is causing this pain but i have been with my boyfriend for 2 years and recently in the last 13 months it has been driving me crazy my nana passed away in july last year and since then i hahve gained weight and fltdown my bf dosnt know what to do and it just leads to aruements cause i cry for no reason ….its not fair only i have made a massive mistake just now and i have text him saying that we shouldnt be together because i make his life hell and i just wreck everything and thats cause its how i feel…but i still love him please help me i dont know what to do…Kate xxx

September 21, 2009 at 10:40 am
(268) D. says:

Kate, I understand how you are feeling. I have been there off and on my whole life. I don’t know what kind of support system you have but I urge you to get professional help if you haven’t already. The fact that you posted on this site is a good sign.

Are there family members or good friends that you can rely on? Ask them to help you find a doctor or find one yourself. Your local hospital should have the ability to help, too. If you don’t have insurance, go anyway. This is the most important thing you can do for yourself.

Losing someone close to you can trigger depression or make it worse. I don’t know how supportive your boyfriend is but maybe taking a break is not a bad thing. The stress of arguing is only going to make it worse. I could be wrong but it sounds like he is not dealing with it well.

It also sounds like you are blaming yourself for the problems. That is another one of depression’s mind games that it likes to play on us. It is so hard to fight back against it.

You are still very young and you have been with him since you were 15. That kind of commitment is tough for adults, let alone teens. Depression often drives an unhealthy dependency on others, especially emotionally.

We can’t bear the thought of being alone, but if the relationship is not healthy, maybe it’s best to take a break. You have to focus all of your attention on getting well.

Don’t let it go because it won’t get better on it’s own. There is more help out there than you realize. Keep us posted.

D.

September 21, 2009 at 6:03 pm
(269) Sheep_from_Poland says:

Hmmm … i think there is a lot of people like who for a moment repute Google as a mastermind – “just ask a question, i know everythimg, even what is wrong with you”. I always had crazy ideas … so i typed it in Google and here i am ! I could just leave, continue killing boring hours before become tired eunoght to fall asleep, but in fact i was curious and started reading few posts. I was a little terryfied when discovered what is this site about. I am 23, few years ago in a high school i felt this way, so alone, so scared, so sad, this stayed and became a part of me, but i realized this feelings just don’t have enough power to rule my life, but also i am not strong eunogh to kill them at all. But you know what i think nowadays ? I think that the memories of very bad days and awareness of my shadows made me a strong man, who can be defeated, but cannot be broken. You know, when you are at the very bottom of your heart, the only way is upward.

September 22, 2009 at 10:06 pm
(270) Jake says:

I’m 22 years old, girlfriendless, jobless, without the capital to fund further education beyond my Associate’s degree and I feel exactly the same way.

However – I’m not loved – excepting my family.

I have a handful of friends, and only two that I talk with regularly.

My 19 yr old ex-fiancee left me for a 34 year old last year around my birthday (great present.) From that date, five years previous, I was in that relationship (for two years) and another for almost three. Both ended up with my heart broken. I only ever tried to love these girls with all of my heart, but in the end, they left me without a bit of love or sympathy. I’m a good looking guy, in great shape, I am hard pressed to find girls who would say otherwise. I’m intelligent, have always pulled great grades in college and high school, and expectations for me were always high. But for some reason, I can’t attract women anymore.

My future looks pretty bleak – I haven’t had a single girl flirt with me in over a year, and I have tried with a few girls here and there (they’ve all basically, at some point, ignored me – even if they gave out their number and talked to me for a significant amount of time)

I shaved my head (it used to be beyond shoulder length), I started working out daily. I started studying and pursuing music more passionately. I started going out, doing the typical socialite things. But still, there’s no woman in my life, and I have yet to make a new friend.

I have to ask, what’s wrong with me exactly?

I’m beginning to think it’s not me at all, but rather, my generation and the modern society. I believe that television has produced a generation of people who expect certain standards to be met that simply aren’t the vast majority of time in reality. Relationship failures and divorce rates are on the rise because people have stopped considering the human beings they are involved with as just that – and instead, they treat them as objects. When you begin to weigh your partner with regards to attributed value in relation to someone else, you’ve failed to treat them as a human being. And you should expect only the same treatment for yourself in the future. Certainly, with the way things look in the modern westernized world, I can’t say it’s going to get any better.

Hold your head up high and blow your brains out. Maybe it’s the better way.

September 27, 2009 at 3:30 am
(271) Aboud says:

So scary how we all did the same search. I’m so glad that I’m not alone. Of course we did the search knowing that “what is wrong with me” will not be answered for us, but we wanted to know if others felt that way.

I’m 20, a male, and a college student.

I think people like us are VERY smart, special people, that have a different perspective of life. Our brains run so fast with so much thoughts, either the past, present, or future. Wanting everything perfect. But we know that doesn’t exist.

Sometimes I feel so happy wishing it stayed that way, but it soon fades. When the sadness comes back you wonder, How was I happy before, why cant I get the feeling now? I just wonder if it happens to everyone, and if so how often. Why do people seem so happy all the time? Maybe they fake it. Sometimes I feel like a fake bitch. Caring about what everyone thinks. I get flashbacks of embarrassing things I did in my life. They all flood my mind. And I just flinch. Sometimes I get so effin lazy, feeling like I’m getting old, and not accomplishing sh!t. Sometimes I think whats the point anymore, why try so hard to succeed if there might not be happiness if I become successful.

But when I’m happy, ALL that sh!t disappears. But that “happy” goes away soon enough.

What could solve that. Will pills help, if so, all my life I would take it? Do I have a disease. Why I’m I tired all the time, and they say its “laziness” I hate that. Why when you have the balls to explain your feelings they say ” You are fine, its all in the head” or they think you want attention. Can simple things cause it. I once read that the dust mites in your computer can cause depression. WTF. If that only can cause that, imagine what else other things can do. Can the food we eat cause this ” What is wrong with me” Can help from a mental health doctor really help you. I always feel put off to go see one. How can they help you, are they perfect. What kind of secret do they know that can help me. How can they get in my brain. Do they sometimes think, this person is really fuck$d up. Could it be something we did. Can we be cursed.

I hate public speaking.

Why at times I can give the best advice to ppl and they listen and they change, but I cant even listen to my own advice.

Hopefully we all find the secret!

You are alive, you have time to change, time to find the real happiness. You have a roof. You might have health. You have a brain, you have a face, you can think, think positive.
Look for the sun, look for family, talk to the family, if you don’t have that look for a friend. YOU will always be attractive to at least someone. Life is all perspective. If you think you are ugly, YOU are wrong! Ugly is when you have no face, or shot in the face and survived. Ugly is when you cant see. Be happy for what you have, not all have it. BE lucky you are alive, you have the chance to live. You could of been a devil, a plant, an animal, but you were born a human. YOU have a chance to be a HUMAN. From all the people of the world that ever lived and that will live, it will never match the amount of stars there is in space. Look how big the stars are, but yet they out number us, you cant match the amount of humans to the amount of stars, the stars out number us. Look how special a star is, so BIG, but we are more special than any star. WE can think, we can cry, we can laugh, that is great, a star cant do that. Explore the world, and do better. Be happy by doing good. Go travel, see how others think, and live. You might change.

September 27, 2009 at 8:28 pm
(272) kirs says:

perfectly said, comment above….
i excepted how i felt and i’m alway hopfully, and have my faith to hold me over, trying to brainwash myself into being happy. i’m lucky to have what i have now, coming from a dysfunctional pass. i over came all that and now i’m on my way to break out and slowly i feel good. what to do, what to do? getting help, take pill’s depends i guess, the people around you seem to you or break you. there soo much left to say, but all i have for you all is

stay strong and think positive, and i hope we all will FIND and KEEP our happiness….

September 28, 2009 at 6:10 pm
(273) Teri says:

Comment # 29 from Jeff made me laugh out loud. Thanks Jeff.

October 5, 2009 at 5:37 pm
(274) Christina says:

Wow, this is amazing, i thought i was a selfish, crazy, moron. I typed in “what is wrong with me” on google because i felt that way, and this is what i find out, turns out i actually might be sick

October 6, 2009 at 7:59 am
(275) Leonie says:

Hmmm….obviously I too typed in those words of “What’s wrong with me?”, came across so many other people who did the same thing – strange. After reading most comments left I feel the need to say, considering that so many of us are feeling this way, there simply can’t be anything wrong with us! My though lays with the way our world has become – stressful, unbearable, ridiculous, expensive, uncaring, busy and way too fast. Has anyone actually stopped and gone back to basics? I wonder? How much support would you get? I don’t believe there is anything wrong with anyone who has left a comment. I see and hear you all wanting and needing a change in something but what? The way the world has become……….

October 7, 2009 at 7:35 am
(276) no one says:

I need help but I don’t want it.

I want to feel things but I hide from them.

I think I’m talented but I feel worthless.

My husband loves me but I feel alone.

I feel so ugly but I don’t try to be beautiful.

I’m always scared but there’s nothing to scare me.

Talking makes me feel better but I know it won’t last.

I feel guilty but I haven’t done anything wrong.

I searched to find out what was wrong with me, but I just found sad people.

I want to help people but I can’t help myself.

All I can say is keep on going. Go for a walk and breath in some fresh air, feel the wind. Start with small steps, try something new and keep working at it. There are kind people everywhere who may smile at you.

October 9, 2009 at 1:11 pm
(277) mark says:

here’s one theory… us so-called “bipolar” people are absolutely everywhere. Everyone. However, the only people labeled (or diagnosed) as bipolar are the ones honest enough to admit it to somebody, i.e a doctor. I’d much prefer honest people. Unexplainable guilt is the main culprit (otherwise known as the idea of Original Sin, thank you very much Catholicism for exploiting our fucked up human nature)
Overall though, it sucks most of the time. I don’t mean this as a joke at all: I try to have fun with it whenever I can. Of course… I’m an unmedicated manic depressive…I’ll probably have a very different kind of post tomorrow. Thank God for hypomanic episodes.

October 10, 2009 at 11:42 am
(278) so sad says:

I wake up every morning and realize that I am still alive and I hate it. There’s nothing wrong with me I tell my self its a act you play on your self. I tell my self your too smart to be crazy to sensible to be mad but I know am not normal.

I hate every minute of it I feel like I am waiting for something that will never happen. I ask my self what is wrong with me? Silence is all I ever hear. No answers nothing god I hate it.

October 12, 2009 at 7:37 am
(279) Sarah0493 says:

I always feel the same way most people posting here do, but I dont think all the people here are bipolar… I am doing a study on it in Psychology class, and there are WAY more symptoms and stuff. But I too typed “whats wrong with me” into Google, and its such a relief, and a disapointment, to see that Im not the only one who feels like this. There must be a place, like a website we can talk, because I find, forme, that the best way to cope is to help other people. Its worked for me for the last 5 years, and while it doesnt eradicate the emotions, it helps me cope.

October 12, 2009 at 6:44 pm
(280) Bepo says:

Here I am. No. 277… Pretty crazy that I too googled the dame phrase ” what is wrong with me”. And as I sit here typing away on my phone leaving this post, I can’t help but wonder in amazement that we all have the same feelings and hope to somehow find our answers in cyberspace. I often wonder is there really something wrong with me or am I just in the wrong place…The wrong time…or just a funk that I’ll evenually overcome. I have everything society says makes you happy… A beautiful home, a husband that loves me. A caring family who’s willing to help if they can and a job, that even though not where I had hoped for myself by now, is ok. So why do I feel so alone? Why do I feel like people just tolerate me because they have to? I feel as if there this idea I have of what I’m supposed to be… What I want to be.. And then i think well… I guess it just not what’s supposed to be. I feel like there’s some kind of block I have that seperates me from my potential. Sometimes I feel like i’m an idiot and everyone thinks I’m an idiot and other times I can be so on top of the world and feel like I can conquer anything and do anything. What the he’ll is wrong with me? I hav’nt conquered anything i had hoped for myself to be.

October 13, 2009 at 3:29 pm
(281) squirrelly says:

All i can say to those who are in agony to please see a psych.

October 13, 2009 at 3:37 pm
(282) Squirrelly says:

It took me 8 years of modifying medications to find the combinations that seemed to help with sleeping problems, depression, mania. I sleep fine now, I do not have mania but I keep adding medications because I still get depressed such as extra 5 mg of lexapro, 1/2 tab of Trileptal. I was diagnosed bipolar 8 yrs ago, but also diagnosed with thought disorder (took a MMPI-2 test which supposed to fine tuned what is wrong) and was expelled from the University in graduate work because of my “temper” and was told that I have personality disorder when I explained what happened to my psy that I had for 5 years and she is good at what she does. But of course, I have my doubts. I can think of many ppl who has personality disorders–but me? surely not. Now I am worried about my health because of all the stress and wondered if the meds are making me tired because for a year now, I have been TIRED! lazy to even look up a phone number in the phone book. My Gosh, this is from an ambitious woman at one time–full of vim and vinegar and potential.

October 14, 2009 at 3:48 am
(283) Francine says:

I have been diagnoised Bi-Polar for years and it just doesnt feel any better. simple things trigger it off and I continually ask this same question.
Like today, I didnot get my sickness benefit yet again (3 Weeks now), they put it into a wrong account yet again. Why do these things happen to me? I lost it for awhile, and then kept on reading this page, but continually ask the question, WHY ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

October 15, 2009 at 2:18 pm
(284) Tam says:

What is wrong with us? Anyone up for a mass suicide?

October 16, 2009 at 8:06 am
(285) Daniel says:

Does anyone else have a similar problems to mine? The vast majority of days I go to bed in the early hours of the morning (sometimes the very early hours) and get up with half the day gone. However, instead of thinking positively and making something of the rest of my day, I just either sit in a daze or lay on the couch (even though there are many more important things I could be doing)I just put them off, because they require mostly mental effort which for some reason I feel permantly low on, unless im out at the pub or doing something else which can’t possibly benefit me in the slightest. I’m a fairly high achiever academically i.e. I recently attained a distinction for my MA and currently am working on my PhD thesis; however, all the way through my academic career it’s been the same. I’ve wasted the majority of my time, but had short bursts of hard work to get me through. I set my alarm every day for a good time to get up in the morning and at night write myself a plan for the next day. But when I wake up in the morning it’s just like I can’t bear to face the world; I’m actually scared of going into Uni and working on my thesis. Sometimes I go weeks without attempting to do any work on it. Even though I know this is severely detrimental to my progress on the doctoral programme, I just can’t seem to help it. I drink loads and eat so much junk food and also use recreational drugs because it hides me from the reality of my situation. However, if I just stopped now and thought, right, tomorrow I’m going to turn everything around, then I could easily do it! This is the insane part: my doctoral thesis is extremely workable, and recently I’ve just started to see a vague yet still promising picture of how it may turn out; that is, things are starting to fall into place. I just can’t seem to pull myself together. I’ve got everything going for me: good family life, good qualifications, good job prospects and I’ve never failed at anything I’ve ever put my mind to. But most of the time, I just want to sit there, or do something that is a complete waste of my time, or take drugs or get drunk to get rid of a really bad sense of guilt that I’m wasting my time. However, for about four or five months of the year, I turn my attention towards my health and I become obsessive about it. I stop drinking, doing drugs, eat a perfect diet and obsess over my weight, and exercise like mad. However, I’ve never got any middle ground. I’m either excessively good or excessively bad. However, even with these bursts of physical fitness, the staying in bed in the morning never goes away. I wouldn’t say that i would actually kill myself but certain thoughts have raced through my head on occasion. The truth is that I think that i am extremely shy and withdrawn, but when im in the pub drinking, everyone says im not shy in the slightest. I stay in bed in the morning and go to bed late at night, not because there is something physically wrong with me, but because either going to bed or getting up in the morning most of the time fills me with a kind of dread and even when I do get up, i sort of feel out of touch with everyone else, kind of isolated. But then I will have bursts of energy mentally when I get fit and healthy, loose loads of weight, obsess over my physical fitness and stay rigidly to a strict regime for eating and drinking. My physical and mental states are all over the place, well that’s how it seems to me. What the hell is wrong with me? Am I just lazy? By the way, sorry for the rather lengthy comment. I bet I sound like a right nut.

October 17, 2009 at 1:39 pm
(286) jane says:

Daniel 282 it sounds like bipolar if a label helps..
I’ve read most of the comments here and appreciate the advice.
i had a dream once, I was sitting on my friend’s fathers lap (in real life, he had always been kind to me) and talking to him and some other people and intermittently I woud kiss him on the cheek. And I felt..I had this amazing feeling that I surely haven’t learnt from waking life- I felt SAFE, certain, like there was nothing more nothing missing.. And i woke up and thought
was that…happiness?? It felt SO GOOD- I remember that it was wonderful but I can’t actually recall into my body.
That ‘creeping cold’ feeling, as someone put it above, as others have talked about, that strange feeling of dread that constantly lurks around in me and surfaces sometimes so overwhelmingly..
it WAS NOT THERE

October 18, 2009 at 7:28 am
(287) jessică says:

Wow I’m glad I found people that feel the same way as me. Sometimes when I was younger I’d always go to sleep crying or feeling sad for no reason. But now I’m 18 and I’ve been in a serious relationship for about a year and it seems like those feelings have taken another level. Almost everynight before I go to sleep I have to flip out at my boyfriend about something and I end up breakin with him almost everynight I cry and throw crazy tantrums and I get really bad headaches. Then in the morning I wakeup like nuthin happened, my boyfriend learned how to deal with it and he usually just doesn’t answer me back and just agrees with me . I don’t know what to do or who to talk to. I’m too embarrased to talk to my parents about it . Does anyone have any idea ?

October 21, 2009 at 4:27 am
(288) Lachlan says:

Funny how we all look for the answers with the same question. I am only 17 and i have been on anti depressants for a few months now. They do work, but not completely. I’m lucky to have found out what i had so early. Also i am diagnosed with anxiety which is a real bitch as well. Many of you may want to check out indigo children because they share many of the same traits and are often misdiagnosed with depression or bi-polar. I know I am one of these children because i fit it perfectly. Anyway back to depression. The only thing that really melos me out is music. And just so you know i do suffer all the symptoms that where mentioned above.

@ jessica: you should tell your parents, its a good chance that you got it from them genetically (that’s how i got it)

Good luck to everyone fighting this battle, i know it is a hard one.

October 24, 2009 at 2:55 pm
(289) DOUG says:

im in iraq and i feel weak minded for thinking im depressed. I like everyone else googled whats wrong with me and got here. I have everything back home. A beautiful girlfriend, a family that loves me, a good paying job yet i get activated and get deployed to iraq and realized all im good at is pointless here. I feel of no good, just wasting my time here. Yes im making money but moneys not everything in life. I have not seen any action nor seen anyone die so i dont have any PTSD but i alienate myself from all other marines. I dont like being in groups, sometimes i have nothing to say so as soon as i can i leave to go back to my living area and all i seem to do is when i ever get a chance to talk to my girlfriend find anything to argue over just to push her away. Im scared of loosing her so i push her away but im scared of pushing her away so i rather loose her. I have days where im like what the hell is wrong with me and then the next day realized im retarted for thinking im depressed but maybe i am, idk.

October 24, 2009 at 5:12 pm
(290) Dante says:

My guess on the answer is quite simple.
I’m 16. I’ve been thinking of blowing my mind out for months now. And why? Dunno. Maybe because I feel alienated from my friends and people at my school. Maybe cause I’m in love with a beautiful girl who’s living in our street, but she ignores and avoids me. Maybe cause I haven’t slept well for weeks now. Maybe because when I’m at home alone, I wanna be with my friends, but when I’m with them, see them laugh and feeling themselves great, I realize I can’t feel that way and I just wanna go home, and I wanna be left alone. Maybe I’m just a lunatic. I really don’t know. I feel like I don’t belong here.
This world we live in is just too cruel and cold, and I think we can’t do anything to change it. I guess it’s a bit natural that we all typed this “magic phrase” in google. There is nobody else to ask.

October 27, 2009 at 8:18 pm
(291) Binny says:

Crazy how well all seemed to have this overwhelming need to find out what would happen if I asked google what was wrong with me. I personally feel displaced and odd like I am in some weird dream. Not depressed but angry and tired, I have been alive for many years and yet i feel like I am asleep.

November 1, 2009 at 11:56 pm
(292) court says:

i typed in what is wrong with me? like many others. i just feel so alone and no one seems to get me anymore. i was diagnosed bipolar over 2 years ago when i was 18 but knowing what’s wrong just seems to make it worse. i have a wonderful fiance` and great friends, but i always feel alone and i’ve just been so incredibly depressed lately and have been having so many suicidal thoughts. i just want everything to be okay. i feel like i’m ruining my relationship with my fiance` and i’m pushing my friends away and that makes me feel even worse, but i just don’t know what to do. i can’t get professional help because i have no insurance and am barely making it financially as it is. i feel like i’m breaking.

November 3, 2009 at 10:06 am
(293) J says:

Wow, so many people wondering what is wrong with them…are we all alike and connected in some way?
I’m happy. Married, with children, a Christian. I have NOTHING to be sad or down about. I just feel like I have this ache in the pit of my gut that needs to be filled and nothing quite reaches it. YES I depend on God for strength and love, but there are days when i just feel like satan has overcome me and my thoughts. How do I escape it?
When i know something is wrong and yet it feels so good. This feeling I’m guessing is like a drug addiction. So again I ask … what is wrong with me! How do i stay focused?

November 6, 2009 at 6:33 pm
(294) Jemx says:

Daniel 282 i am almost EXACTLY the same, although i manage to get up in the morning but preoccupy myself with television programs and house work. i was supposed to finish uni this july and graduate november, but i never did my dissertation, i couldnt bring myself to do it, i felt sick everytime i thought about doing any work. iv always like you got good grades in anything iv put my mind to, its not that i cant do it, its that i feel like i physically cant do it. iv been trying to organise doing my dissertation this year, but i still feel the same and im worried i wont be able to do it. iv been to the doctors twice about how im feeling, but they send me away with no new information, and leaving me feel like theres nothing actually wrong with me and i should carry on as i am, when i know theres something that needs addressing!! apparently iv not been myself for a year, i just want to feel happy again!

November 8, 2009 at 9:28 pm
(295) SuzieB says:

I feel so useless – i feel like please make me die, please make this pain end… but i have 4 children, in their 20′s 1 just 18 and a grandson of 4 months, but the pain never stops. i have an important job – bt i dont care any more, i dont know where to go or how to stop this feeling. If you met me you would think i was the most in control person . but i am not – i am crap and i want the pain to end, and then i leave a lot of people unhappy for what, just to sreve myself, how selfish is that – i am disgusted with myself

November 9, 2009 at 12:46 pm
(296) who cares says:

I feel like there is no point to anything. I wake up, go for a run, go to school, go to work, ride my horse, and go home. I have tonnes of friends…who all think I’m some super happy, ditzy sorority girl. My dad is a psychologist and even he can’t tell that my whole life is a lie. I hate my life and I hate myself and I’m so angry and so depressed all the time. I could never go to anyone for help, because I know I would never tell them the truth. It wouldn’t matter if they were a professional, I could never tell a real person. In fact, this is the first time I’ve ever mentioned it to anyone. I think about killing myself all the time, but I was raised in a Christian home, and even though I don’t feel any of that in my heart, it’s like I know in my mind it’s true. So I can’t kill myself because then I’ll go to hell and I can’t deal with that. I wish this feeling would just go away! I’ve always felt like this and now I’m 20 and doing well in school and still pretending to be happy. Like, when I was a kid, I thought maybe everyone felt this way and that I should just act like everyone else and maybe if I did, I would start to feel the way I was acting. It never worked, and I feel so lost. I just keep thinking that it has to go away at some point. I mean, I exercise, I eat alright, I have an awesome network of friends, a couple of whom are depressed themselves ( why can’t I even tell them?), I have the perfect life. I’m going to an awesome university in a beautiful place and I even got to bring my horse with me. I don’t drink or do drugs because I’m scared to lose control and afraid I’ll tell someone the truth and my whole world will fall apart. I don’t even know what happiness is. WHY CAN’T I JUST FEEL HAPPY?

November 9, 2009 at 1:09 pm
(297) no point says:

I feel exactly the same way as who cares. It’s like I’m stuck in this horrible lie and because I’ve been lying for so long, there is no way to get out. Everyone and everything makes me angry, but I keep it all to myself. Everyone thinks I’m so happy all the time and it takes so much energy to pretend to be normal. I would never tell a therapist the truth so there is no point in going to one. I’m so depressed and so tired all the time. If I could I would just stand in the shower all day long. I become obsessive over everything. If someone puts the cups back in the cupboard in the wrong order, I just want to kill them. I never actually would, but there is this incredibly intense anger that I can never get rid of. Also, I don’t quite get what borderline personality disorder is? I spend a lot of my time in my own world making up novels in my head. I could never write them out because they are so messed up. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

November 10, 2009 at 8:01 pm
(298) Trinity says:

Thank you, Sonia, Me…. you are not alone.

November 14, 2009 at 1:59 am
(299) S.T says:

I typed in “whats wrong with me” like the rest of you and ended up here. I wish I could relax and be happy, I have to tell myself to laugh. I wish I was back in H.S., life just seemed so simple.

November 14, 2009 at 4:15 am
(300) DanK says:

Just as everyone else here, i googled “what is wrong with me” and wound up here. I have never been diagnosed with any mood disorder, and since I am adopted, its hard to get a legitamte family history. I go through bouts of self-diagnosed depression, but never feel comfortable talking about it with anyone. When i was younger, I asked my parents to send me to counseling but the guy truely was a quack, and didnt want to talk about anything I was interested in…like what was wrong with me.

For years I have had trouble waking up on time..or else I stay up all night. I have the grey feeling about life constantly. I just want it to all go away. Occasionally I will have suicidal thoughts, though I am always able to make myself see that my troubles will go away. But it still scares me that I feel this way. I have told my best friend already that someday I will do it. Not as a threat, but just because I think taht one day the “darkness” will be more than I can handle.

I am glad that I found this site though. Simply typing this out is cathartic, though I know its only a temporary fix. What makes this even more complicated for me, is that I am afraid to see another doctor becuase it could end up costing my job.

Its not a great way, but to anyone who needs it, i find that simply watching TV or doing puzzles helps to take my mind off everything. I end up wasting alot of time, but if i dont have a chance to dwell on my own thoughts, I am able to stay somewhat sane.

Thanks for everyone who writes here. I know it will be as helpful to others as it is for me.

November 17, 2009 at 12:52 am
(301) Van says:

Holy crap. How many people typed in “what is wrong with me?” into Google? I know I did. It really goes to show the common thinking, or should I say desperation/boredom, etc of people today. Personally, I really want to know why I feel the way I do, why I do the things I do.. and what the hell is my purpose in life. I could rant on about all my problems, but instead, I’ll leave you with this question: Why do so many people in today’s society ask themselves “what is wrong with me?” and never question the society itself?

November 18, 2009 at 5:58 pm
(302) Lucy S says:

unbelievable… so many comments i wish i could read them all…i guess it helps that some ppl feel the same way i do. theres nothing wrong with my life really, i think im healthy, no family problems and i have got friends. Im in yr 10 now and taking my gcse’s, but nothings right. there are a few of my friends that are just constantly mean to me, we are mates though and I know that I do have other friends but losing them would make me alone in some classes, i don’t want that. Still, i’m fairly clever, people say I’m pretty and could be a model but I’m really not sure, maybe theyre talking shit. All the time I just feel down, sad… then i feel happy but whenever i’m happy or confident my “friends” just get me down again, saying I’m big-headed. I have no idea what to do, sometimes I just wish that something actually would go wrong in my life, my friends lives are so dramatic and I’m just boring. I think I stooped real low when I tried to make myself sick. I know right I’m just a pathetic mess, I want to live but I want to be happy, and I’m not happy now. :(

November 18, 2009 at 6:02 pm
(303) lucy says:

help plz

November 19, 2009 at 2:01 pm
(304) me says:

I typed ‘What’s Wrong With Me’ into Google, like everybody else.

I’m in a real low now.

November 23, 2009 at 10:55 am
(305) Hopeful says:

I share a lot of the feelings the people who commented above did. I’ve been on and off all sorts of meds, currently take Cymbalta. It helps with some things but not to the point I feel it should…plus when you’re on a med like that the side effects can depress you as well, and it has more control of you than you do…I get anxious in public, irritable and it’s just plain annoying..Little things bother me…For the longest time I was always positive and still try to be, but sometimes life can get the best of all of us. I exercise regularly, read positive inspiring books, eat healthy and listen to selfhelp audiobooks…However it seems there’s something at the root of all my problems that needs to be “yanked out”..maybe others feel the same? I know a psychiatrist/psychologist would help but that costs big $ without med insurance…

Best advice I can offer is to keep looking at this as a major challenge that will make each of us stronger. The famous quote from Sun Tzu says: “The journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.”

November 29, 2009 at 4:31 pm
(306) Swedish enigma. says:

That’s how I feel, all the time.
And I also typed in “what’s wrong with me” on google and this site came up. Very uplifting I must say.

December 5, 2009 at 3:55 am
(307) Mahmoud says:

i was just googleing (what is wrong with me !!!
and her i am
all what is writen above is all me
and thank you very much

December 8, 2009 at 12:05 am
(308) BobbyG says:

Welcome to life.
I know it sucks right now… but it will work out.
You can do it. Work through your thoughts.
This is life, it has a hard meaning, but it’s amazing.

Avoid pills. The answer is not in a bottle.
It’s so much more rewarding if you and your mind can solve this without pills.

LOVE is the answer
It took me a long time to figure it out….
But it is so worth it.
Good luck.

December 15, 2009 at 3:16 pm
(309) Seth says:

I don’t know what is wrong with me…..I felt like maybe by some miracle if I typed this in, I would get a tell all description on how to fix myself. After reading all of these comments, I’ve come to realize that there isn’t one final answer on how to fix me. I can’t hold a relationship…..I either self-destruct and hurt the ones close to me or I pick the ones that don’t care enough about me. I have no one to talk to and I feel so alone. Anyone that has ever gotten close to me has ran away screaming or they have left me before I give them the chance. I want closure in my life and have thought about going to drastic measures to just keep it from continuing. At the same time, all I know this will do is make the ones that have stayed close to me, despise me and hurt more than I am. I feel so lost and just want something to go right. I know others have it way worse but this doesn’t make me feel any better about my situation. Can someone or some thing just make this hurt stop?

December 15, 2009 at 7:36 pm
(310) Sigh says:

I keep trying to fix myself. But i’m failing. I can’t find meds that work. If someone makes it to the other side (finds a better, more balanced life), please report back to those of us who still stuck in the hole.

I sometimes feel like i’m making this all up and being dramatic. like maybe i’m a hypochondriac. meh.

so many important things to do right now, but i will just go back to sitting on the couch.

December 16, 2009 at 12:05 am
(311) Why the hell do you care? says:

hello everyone
im just like u guys who always has the feeling “what is wrong with me” but i think i kinda’ know the reason. im a mid-teenager with a lot of stress from my school (PS i dont live in america), here u get fuc*ed if u dont study, but still i just im too lazy to work and do something. to add to this, my parents are getting divorced(i know it sounds lyk a bigger issue, but they’ve been fighting since my birth, so it hardly matters now), i also have very less frnds now coz all of a sudden im too geeky for many of ‘em.i get angry at smaall things and feel depressed, lonely and helpless inside,im sure im in depression

December 23, 2009 at 11:42 am
(312) Leila says:

Hey all,

Bobby G… i like your comment very much and I agree with you, the answer is not in the bottle nor it is in the little cute box :)
To LUCY.. babygirl, don’t worry about these friends who are playing with your head, just focus on you school work,try to get good grades so that you can get into a good university. I know at your age friends are very important, but please don’t hang on to bad people just to feel liked. you already have people who would die for you, your family, you must know that you are loved very much by them. And I am sure you also have a couple of good friends, but the Most importantly, don’t ever let anyone control your emotions, don’t let them get you down or have the ability to make you happy, have control of you, know ho you are, don’t wait anyone to tell you who you are, have confidence in your self and know that you are all of that and a bag of chips ;)

Now my turn:
Most of the people in here are very young,I am in my mid thirties, which makes me feel like I am a loser Dinosaur, so old and still so confued in life, it sucks!…I feel my life is passing me by, and I am sitting somewhere and watch it go by day in and day out, I need to make so many changes in my life but I just don’t have the energy, the confidence, courage or the startegy. i know I am capable of acheiving more in life, but I just don’t know how, in the meantime am getting older by the second. I know there is so much more to life than just going to work in the mornings in a place I dislike very much and coming home to make dinner for my five year old.

I must also admit that my life is good, and that the almighty is alwys kind to me but I can’t help but to feel this way

I am usualy in a melocholy mood, I have no zest nor passion in life, nothing much excites me
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? and what should I do?

December 27, 2009 at 2:02 am
(313) adrean says:

so we’re all obviously here because we all typed the same thing and feel the same feelings and are in the same boat i need to know 1> how to fix this before i lose everything/one close too me being this way and 2> if there are sooo many people that feel this way are we the norm and and their the lost ????

December 28, 2009 at 11:55 pm
(314) Gray says:

i feel the same way too, i hope i can find my cure. pls help

January 9, 2010 at 6:49 am
(315) bek says:

I have struggled with mental disorders since i developed serious anxiety disorder at age 11 after seeing my father cheat on my mother with a 16 year old girl. Since then i have been diagnosed with everything from depression to add, only to be diagnosed with bipolar 2 and a half months ago. Good news or bad news?! My life has been such a struggle and i still feel like that afraid 11 year old girl. I am currently staying in a psyc ward to try and sort out my medication and get my life on track. I have no trust in men, that on top of my bipolar is no good for any relationship so even in my current relationship i feel alone. I think about suicide everyday of my life and have done for the past 17 years. I am told with medication and therapy i can get this all under control. I appreciate everyone sharing their stories because this is very hard to live with. Its nice to know that im not alone in this. Its nice to know somewhere, there is someone who understands what im going through.

January 16, 2010 at 1:24 am
(316) Lauren says:

i am 14 years old, and ive been through a lot of deaths and one of the most people family member i have ever had, died when i was 10. I use to live in south africa, the weak that person died, we decided to start fresh, new zealand, all green and safe. the first weak i was in new zealand, i was still 10, i got sexualy abused and for about a year only i was in and out of councelling, seeing profecionals ect. i ignored it, made it seen like nohing, and then i caught up with me last year, i started self harming, blaming myself for deaths and arguements, me and my dad didnt have a very good relationship at all. When they noticed i was self harming, they sent me to councelling again, i didnt talk, i had a book that i use to write what i feel, it scared my mum a lot and she was having a nervous break down. S yea, then there were social workers, then i again pretended it didnt bother me, pretended to be happy, and they fell for it. But since then, ive been having axiety, stress a lot, sometimes i get little panick attacks, i havent told anyone because it hurt a lotof people with what i was going through. It feels so good to talk to people that understand the way you feel, and i can finally let it out.
thanks a lot you guys, xox

January 26, 2010 at 4:01 am
(317) EP says:

I need to see a doctor, but I do not. I know there’s something wrong with me; I know ill probably kill myself eventually, I just don’t know how yet. It feels like no one is real, they’re just sent here to make me want to kill myself. I know the people I loosely call friends plot against me to ruin my reputation. Part of me wishes I was part of the system again, a fully functional member of society; more of me knows that scietys wants me die. Everyday I have panic attacks. I am so terrified of what people think about me, that I plan my schedule around when the fewest people will be on the street. People terrify me. When I meet them, I lose reality; it turns into a dream, an out-of-body experience. There is no one for me to be close to, no one can see who I am; loving passionate and caring. They don’t even talk to me. I don’t talk much because about every third sentence is 3/4 retarded; probably because I’ll talk to myself for half a conversation. People who want to know me cant’t because I’m always wasted; and how can they know me if I don’t know myself? I can’t sleep at night, if i’m not loaded as fuck I’ll stare at the ceiling for hours. Even if I fall asleep, I feel exhausted all day. I probably have a substance abuse problem, but it’s better than being up all night. Sometimes I think it’s all in my head, but then I catch myself thinking about throwing myself into traffic and I feel confused. I’m so confused all the time; I know what I think and believe sounds insane, but I can’t stop thinking it. The sad part is that is this why I don’t get help, because it might not be real, I might just be looking for attention subconsciously. I don’t want to sound like bitch. Someday I’ll die; I just don’t want to wait till then

January 27, 2010 at 5:21 pm
(318) justme says:

I am in a daze, and so sad most of the time. I want to cry but no tears come, I don’t know why I feel sad cos life isn’t so bad at the mo. I tried killing myself a while ago but as you can see it didn’t work since then i’ve been on 3 diffrent anitdepressants, the first ones made me so spaced out I didn’t know what was up and what was down, the next didn’t really work and the new ones (been on for 8 months) arn’t working any more. I over analyise eveything people say and do trying to figure out what they think of me, this often gets me into trouble as I always think the worst – that they don’t like me, they carn’t wait till I am gone etc. Then I’ll get hyper and be happy as anything, only I carn’t channel that energy into anything productive. Even if I’m really hungry I won’t bother to cook anything for myself. I just don’t know what to do. Help.

February 10, 2010 at 10:04 pm
(319) Bobby G says:

Hello Leila.
Thanks for the kind words. I was surprised to find that you have a child, and still so full of worried thoughts. But then again I’m saying that based on knowing my life and my almost 4 year old nephew, who brings so much joy in my life. I don’t know you or anything about you.
I only see my nephew on weekends and when I have him I enjoy every second of it. I love watching him grow. I’ve seen start with baby sign language, crawling, walking… WOW.. what an amazing journey. My nephew is my “no worries drug”. When ever he is around, my worry thoughts go away. But then along comes Monday morning :(

I like coming back here and reading other peoples thoughts, and even my old posts. From reading my old ones, I can tell things are getting better. Which makes me feel so much better. I think my first post was November 2008. So it’s been about 15 months.

What is helping me is just living life. It takes time to feel it, but I’m finding that going for long walks and talking to myself helps. Don’t hide or run from your thoughts.
I like to youtube videos for Deepak Chopra, eckhart tolle and family development “stuff” from Gabor Mate.
I don’t have kids of mine own, not yet, but I want to be prepared!
This is something me and my brain are going to fix together. I know it will work out, and it will be amazing at the end of it all. This phase… or this journy. Life is full of journeys….. and for all ages.
I had my troubles as a teen, but when I look back at them now I think “WOW…. I would give anything to be a teen again.
So thats why you have to step outside yourself and look back. See if you can see any major points, or thoughts, that need to be worked on.

Good luck to everyone.
BobbyG Feb 10,2010

February 11, 2010 at 2:50 pm
(320) robert says:

I fell horable because I lied to a friend becaus see wasn’t going to the school dance and I wasnted her to go reall baad what should I do

February 16, 2010 at 1:26 pm
(321) Joshua says:

On top of the hopelessness and depression, I have fits of rage, and sometimes I might have a small panic attack. Explain, somebody?

March 6, 2010 at 8:55 pm
(322) maggie and katie says:

my friend katie and i feel like blaaaahhhhhhhh dadadada :(

March 9, 2010 at 11:15 am
(323) david says:

Has anyone ever considered that it is all the chemicals in the food the water and the very air we breath. The last bastion of population control “get them to kill themselves”?

March 13, 2010 at 11:56 pm
(324) J says:

What can I say? Another guilty “what’s wrong with me?” inquierer.

I feel to some extent the way all of you feel – I read all these comments and relate to all of them in some way; the ‘I-have-so-much-to-be-happy-for-but-am-not’ comments, the ‘my-girlfriend-tries-to-help-but-doesn’t-get-it’ comments, and the ‘I-spent-another-weekend-in-my-apartment-by-myself’ comments. I’m 27 and for the past 10 years I have (on and off) felt ALL of these things. And I feel them again right now.

But it is comforting to know that other people feel the same way, for 2 reasons. 1) because I know that I’m not alone, regardless of how much I feel like I am; and 2) because it shows that, in our numbers, we are doing something to change this world.

I realize reason #2 sounds strange but let me explain. This is what I have to tell myself every time I feel this way. I have no health insurance, no medication, and no one (that I know of) that feels the way I do that I can talk to about this. But this is my rationale: regardless of the way we try to think, the drugs we take, or the advice we get from others, we ALL, when trying to explain this feeling, can rationally say that this is not US – it’s THEM. THEY don’t understand US, THEY don’t see things the way WE do, etc., etc. Well what if we’re right? What if that is in fact what’s going on here? What if the way schooling, careers, society, social groups, etc., are structured IS completely f-ed? People are quick to tell you that you need drugs and, if you are a danger to yourself by all means, take them. But from what I get out of the comments here, the majority of you reading this, like myself, are not suicidal. You’re not severely depressed or anti-social, you have jobs and school and relationships and families, you just see things differently, and not in a positive way. You look at the things around you and don’t get it. That’s how I feel, and that’s what people don’t get when I try to explain it. They think something’s wrong with me – that I need medication or that I’m depressed. I’m not depressed and I refuse to take medication so that I can be a happy-go-lucky person walking through life pumped full of so many drugs that I’m numb to fact things are in fact screwed up in this world. That’s what it boils down to. Things are screwed up in this world, there are injustices – I notice them, I feel them, and THAT impacts me. For that to not impact you, you would have to be heartless.

So back to reason #2 – changing the world. Continue to feel this way – it shows that you are capable of something that I see less and less everyday – Empathy. Feel empathetic and let the injustices and pains of the world sink in. But know what they are and know that you feel the way you do for THAT reason. NOT because something is wrong with YOU. And then, when you make that realization, do something to change it. Join a group, a club, the Peace Corps… anything. The feeling will not go away, but you’ll be doing something about it. And that helps. A lot. I can tell you right now, you’ll run into a lot of people that will NOT understand you. But f them. They’re exactly like all the other people that don’t understand us. You cannot allow yourself to let people like that make you think that something is wrong with you. You can’t. Because there are a lot more of them than there are of us, and a suprising number of them are quick to let you know that they think something is wrong with you. THERE’S NOT. It’s human to feel.

March 14, 2010 at 12:06 am
(325) J says:

What can I say? Another guilty “what’s wrong with me?” inquierer.

I feel to some extent the way all of you feel – I read all these comments and relate to all of them in some way; the ‘I-have-so-much-to-be-happy-for-but-am-not’ comments, the ‘my-girlfriend-tries-to-help-but-doesn’t-get-it’ comments, and the ‘I-spent-another-weekend-in-my-apartment-by-myself’ comments. I’m 27 and for the past 10 years I have (on and off) felt ALL of these things. And I feel them again right now.

But it is comforting to know that other people feel the same way, for 2 reasons. 1) because I know that I’m not alone, regardless of how much I feel like I am; and 2) because it shows that, in our numbers, we are doing something to change this world.

I realize reason #2 sounds strange but let me explain. This is what I have to tell myself every time I feel this way. I have no health insurance, no medication, and no one (that I know of) that feels the way I do that I can talk to about this. But this is my rationale: regardless of the way we try to think, the drugs we take, or the advice we get from others, we ALL, when trying to explain this feeling, can rationally say that this is not US – it’s THEM. THEY don’t understand US, THEY don’t see things the way WE do, etc., etc. Well what if we’re right? What if that is in fact what’s going on here? What if the way schooling, careers, society, social groups, etc., are structured IS completely f-ed? People are quick to tell you that you need drugs and, if you are a danger to yourself by all means, take them. But from what I get out of the comments here, the majority of you reading this, like myself, are not suicidal. You’re not severely depressed or anti-social, you have jobs and school and relationships and families, you just see things differently, and not in a positive way. You look at the things around you and don’t get it. That’s how I feel, and that’s what people don’t get when I try to explain it. They think something’s wrong with me – that I need medication or that I’m depressed. I’m not depressed and I refuse to take medication so that I can be a happy-go-lucky person walking through life pumped full of so many drugs that I’m numb to things are in fact screwed up in this world. That’s what it boils down to. Things are screwed up in this world, there are injustices – I notice them, I feel them, and THAT impacts me. For that to not impact you, you would have to be heartless.

So back to reason #2 – changing the world. Continue to feel this way – it shows that you are capable of something that I see less and less everyday – Empathy. Feel empathetic and let the injustices and pains of the world sink in. But know what they are and know that you feel the way you do for THAT reason. NOT because something is wrong with YOU. And then, when you make that realization, do something to change it. Join a group, a club, the Peace Corps… anything. The feeling will not go away, but you’ll be doing something about it. And that helps. A lot. I can tell you right now, you’ll run into a lot of people that will NOT understand you. But f them. They’re exactly like all the other people that don’t understand us. You cannot allow yourself to let people like that make you think that something is wrong with you. You can’t. Because there are a lot more of them than there are of us, and a suprising number of them are quick to let you know that they think something is wrong with you. THERE’S NOT. It’s human to feel.

March 19, 2010 at 10:21 pm
(326) not much wrong says:

Great posts everyone, I agree with those who feel uplifted with a sense of solidarity in finding others with the same question. I agree with J 322, in that there isn’t necessarily anything wrong with us, it’s just that the world breeds discontent. And i don’t think the world is screwed up completely either, it’s just the nature of things that we as humans are creatures with a sense of and striving for perfection, yet find ourselves in a dynamic and often less-than-perfect world.

But maybe that’s the fun of it, that we can dig deep into that discontent and find ways to impress a higher standard on the world – in whatever the hell way we do it, even if it means being cynical and griping about various things, but also lending a hand here and there, offering a new insight, new hope, or whatever. Maybe we’re more together than people who think the world is just fine already, and who get cheap thrills from the most inane nonsense. At the same time, it helps to show that we can put on a happy face too – so as not to rub too many people the wrong way.

Whatever, I’m rambling for sure. But I too Googled What Is Wrong With Me? Yet in the end i don’t think anything huge is wrong, so long as I remember that it’s natural to feel isolated, small, insignificant, cold, drained of vitality, at times – but there can also be powerful ways to find meaning in life, find a purpose, connect to larger goals and priorities, broaden our perspective, and say step off my back world, it’s my turn, i’ve got some grievances with you and i’m gonna come after YOU now. 99% jibberish, 1% read-worthy? ;-)

March 26, 2010 at 4:32 am
(327) Nelson says:

What is wrong with me? I typed those words in as a joke to myself, never expecting them to lead anywhere. I have asked this question a billion times, and never had what equates to a stadium full of people already ask the same. I am so lost in my own hell right now. I came so close to the edge tonight. I can’t even remember what I wanted to say. At least I am not the first to type those words, and I bet I won’t be the last

March 29, 2010 at 12:34 pm
(328) -----14 year old says:

OMG.. i feel like that too, I have a lot of friends,, but still i feel lonely.. I feel like my mom hates me, only because she has a new boyfriend.. but she really loves me and wants all whats best for me.. I think I’m ugly, but what is the reason that all boys look at me?? I feel mad that I write this, but still I feel like i HAVE to write it to feel better.. If you would see me you would never know that I wrote this,, I’m not an emo,, i’m a girly girl.. always lauging with friends.. but I still have my secrets.
behind my look there is a shy small girl..

April 4, 2010 at 3:19 pm
(329) LOWE says:

I’m just another lost one!
Reading your comments helped me to understand something very important… many of “us” are searching, but still no one has found “The Answer”!
I read most of your (my lovely colleagues) comments, and now, I believe there is nothing wrong with any of us; it is only matter of “expectations”… please allow me explain myself; the world is programming us to expect more from ourselves; more than what the world is sharing with us, therefore, we feel not fulfilling our expectations (in any sense, material or no material)… just look at the people – economic wise – in the ”third world countries”; they are struggling everyday just to feed themselves and feel safe and they own nothing else than their life and still thou they often laugh with whole their feelings! I guess if they read our lines, they would be wondering or even asking – what the hell we are talking about!
Let us be “just grateful” for what we have and not play the world’s game… don’t push yourself beyond your will… “Let it be” and enjoy with the minimum that world has shared with us, and get the maximum joy out of it!
After all, life is too short and while we are worrying, time is running!

April 15, 2010 at 2:54 am
(330) MARIA says:

Thank you LOWE, u couldnt have said it better..i totally agree its perfectly normal to feel like this so to everyone who googled”what is wrong with me” just like i did…your answer is NOTHING! its normal people i myself have also felt miserable i might be bipolar or what ever scientist want to call it but HEY now i know im not the only one who feels like this…i mean just look above how many of us are..i knw it could be very hard, at times i feel like giving up and just staying in myroom until i come out of this depression that all of nowere hits me..but we cant stop trying..its confusing even to think that we are normal because we dont feel like this moodswings should be normal but it is my friends.Afortunately we happen to be that group of people that have it harder when at one point in our lives there is a change or somenthing is going on…Two ADVICE i have to say to every one is be OPEN, express how ur feeling when ur down or something is troubling you it doesnt have to a physicatrist, anyone you trust or cares for you is good enough..and let GOD into ur heart trust me he is nothing but love and peace…its helped for me, i still have my ups and downs but its normal because im going through so many stress right now over planing my wedding but anywho i always trie to crie to him for companian and strength along my path and he has .GOD is there for you unfortunately we cant be face to face with him but in SOUL we are.People have faith in urself and dont give up when ur feeling like this..its a terrible moment so dont let it eat you..we are all brave enough for leaving our comments here and honestly i felt good letting ya know how i feel and glad i wasnt the only weirdo…good luck and BLESS YOU ALL!!

April 16, 2010 at 4:49 pm
(331) Laura says:

I I am so glad that we, humans are so alike. I alwyas thought that everyone was different and special in their own way. It is true, but I have realized that we follow through much of the same feelings. You may think you are the only one and you can’t explain it- No one will undersatnd. But people do.

I feel exactly this. I have friends who love me, my family, everything, but still i feel alone and happy and sad. Today, I felt this. And I actually said to myself, what is wrong with me? I am tired of feeling tired (sorry for the horrible use of colons e.c.t) and feeling tired of feeling empty like this all the time. Today was a normal day. Nothing horrible happened. And I try to take it out of my heart. The feeling in my throat. I take yoga classes and I seem to still not be calm. I feel better. But also I don’t because I can calm myself like that in less than a minute with my brain. I don’t know how, but I can…ugh
I think that people need to notice how lucky they are.

And I think when you are in regular depression or other depression disorders, listening to music helps me the most I think. Just think about the words of the song, relate them to you. Or classical music makes my imagination go off: I see a mental movie in my mind. One i made up. Listening to classical music makes me think of a little girl in a dress going on an adventure to find something! She searches the forest and she meets a man. Also try just taking a notecard or a piece of paper and you don’t have to think about your day or anything, begin writing. Write about how you feel. Then after you finish. Read it again as another person and you will be surprised that you feel better about reading what you said. When you read it again you make comments on like “i don’t think there’s anything wrong with me!” If this doesn’t work, try again the next day. If it doesn’t work the there are many other things you can do to calm your soul. Just listen top the advice: ask for advice.

April 17, 2010 at 11:16 am
(332) Laura again says:

I agree with BobbyG. Love IS the answer!
and another person who said that just wake up the next day and you will feel better. a whole NEW day! Time to change the world. Time to strart thos goals you’ve been meaning to do for years now.

Here is a poem I made up. I thing It could be better. But I want you to understand…

If you are you

There is always going to be someone or something to love you

If they die

Their love will remain in their heart’s they died for you

If there is no person that loves you

Then an animal will always love you

If your pet doesn’t love you or you don’t have one

Then you will love yourself

If you don’t love yourself,

Then God will love you

If you do not believe in such a thing

Then the bright sun, the bluest ocean, the promising sky, and all little creatures will love you

If you do not believe that nature can love

Then love will come with patience and in time. It is waiting for you to finally discover it.

You just haven’t found it yet.

If you do not think that someone or something can or will love you

Then you will love someone

If you do not believe in love

Then you must not have a heart

You cannot possibly have a heart, because everyone who has a heart loves. You were born with it for a reason. Without a heart you are a dead soulless creature that does not live. A heartless person did not have a reason to be.

Someone or something will love you if you are you

I recommend a song. Listen to Blessed, by Martina McBride (love her)
And take it in
Read a book too or something. Go on a hike. Have time alone outside surrounded by the beauty of the world.

Take in the good things, not the bad.

If you are hurt inside. Just let it go away. Let it pass you by. At that moment that you start to feel like this, immediately don’t take it in, instead listen or do something meaningful to you. Something that brings back memories of the “good old days” and REALLY focus. Take it in: that good thing.
God bless you all. <33333

April 17, 2010 at 1:59 pm
(333) LOWE says:

I just felt like saying “HI” to everyone… and wish you all a good day!

NOTE: as much as I read your comments, more I discover myself!

April 17, 2010 at 11:50 pm
(334) steph says:

Go to God!! He has all the answers! Philipians 4:19 (God will supply all my needs), Proverbs 3:5-6. Try to pray to God, even if you don’t know what to say. Just tell Him what you are going through and ask Him for help. For information about ‘getting saved’, you can check out the Joyce Meyers web site, or Creflo Dollar, or Kenneth Copeland, or Eaglebrookchurch.com. Life is rough, but with God as your everlasting friend and savior, it doesn’t have to be so bad! You ALWAYS have a friend in the Lord and He is with and loves you ALWAYS!

April 18, 2010 at 2:48 pm
(335) JJ says:

whats wrong with me i hav all the things it said at the top of the page

April 22, 2010 at 8:46 am
(336) EJ says:

I think that “what is wrong with me” is the best thing I’ve ever googled!

(82) Daniel – I totally relate! Sometimes I wonder if it is possible to SHUT my head UP! Then, other times the nothingness prevails…

I relax a bit when I grasp that we little humans are nothing more than nothing much – only kindness matters. Send out the energy you wish to be surrounded by.

Love love love

April 24, 2010 at 4:18 am
(337) Jeff says:

Yep, I feel exactly the same thing..

April 28, 2010 at 11:42 pm
(338) M says:

It hurts, knowing my depression probably drives away so many people. I hate the feeling.

April 29, 2010 at 8:28 pm
(339) T says:

It’s good to know im not the only one. I don’t know what to say except….ugh! I hate this. My kids must think im crazy. I cant do this anymore. This really sucks, sucks, sucks, sucks, and sucks so more.

May 1, 2010 at 6:39 pm
(340) J says:

I found myself almost 8 months ago typing the common message into google “what is wrong with me”. I’m 24, I haven’t had the easiest life thus far but many people have it/have had it alot worse than I have and for that I’m grateful. I find my mind wandering a bit from time to time about my future. I admit I do dwell on my past and it hurts. I do have 2 or 3 close friends. Everyone else is on the outside. I have a wonderful amazing beautiful girlfriend who loves me and has accepted me for who I am. Yet I still feel this emptiness. Like I’ve been lost in the same place for years. I do feel crazy at time because I look around and none of my friends go through this. Like one guy said up above about being obsessive about his health and then 3 weeks later go back to the old me. Thats what I do. I’m not fat but I’m not in shape either. I do get in shape for those 3 weeks and then go back to my bad habits. One person said they wish despite having the troubles as a teen..they want to go back to being one and I understand that feeling. I hate the feeling of giving up but too scared to pull the trigger. I don’t wanna die. I just want everything to be alright again. If that made any sense. But anyways the teenage years were a simple time where you don’t have to worry about much. I want life to be simple…not so hard and complex. I wanna be completely happy. Not just happy when I’m with my girlfriend or out playing football. I wanna be happy inside my own home. I hate this feeling. I’m glad I found this place however. It makes me feel just a little less crazy.

May 3, 2010 at 9:45 am
(341) katie says:

you sound like you’re depressed. get some help.

May 10, 2010 at 5:04 pm
(342) Eve says:

I don’t think I have this but may be I have some form of it. I have something, or maybe I’m just not fit for this earth. That’s how I feel. Like I’m a freak or something. And I let derogatory thoughts to myself go through my head, like you idiot and just shut up you fat b*** and you’ll never be anything and sometimes I punish myself by doing something I don’t like. Other times I just self-indulge and say, who cares? No one really cares about me. But I have a loving family especially my mother and it makes me guilty to feel this way because I had such a good life and I really have no excuse.
But I really do deserve bad things to be said about me and I know people think it if only in their subconscious. I don’t have any close friends right now and I never like to get to close to people for fear they’ll see my faults and horrible vulnerability. That is one reason why I’m a loser (I know, people don’t respect people who don’t respect themselves, but that is part of my punishment). Another is I only had one boyfriend and when my parents moved I moved with them and I never saw him again. Anyway, I love fictional men more than real ones (though I’ve never really gotten close to one enough to know!). Especially the ones in stories I write.
I’ve always lived in a fictional world much better than in a real one. I like to write and I spent (wasted)all my teenage years writing a ‘novel’ that will never see the light of day.
Furthermore, I still live at my parents after college and I don’t have a job after a year.
And I have no excuse for it.
Except that I’ve always been this way, a loner, living in fantasy instead of reality.
I am supposed to be a Christian but Christians are supposed to do something with their faith.
I feel like a lazy bum and I can never get something started for fear it’ll not work out. I want to write for a living but I know I can’t because I’m not that good at it, and all my stories don’t have the authenticity that real life brings to stories.
I sometimes thought that I should be abused and that would be better because I’d have some excuse.
I am mad at God for making me the way I am.
I live in my head and would be perfectly comfortable there the rest of my life if I didn’t have to live in the real world and earn money.
I used to pray that God would send me a hardship so I could actually either die or react, anything better than nothingness.
This is nothing new, I had suicidal thoughts when I was fifteen, I contemplated using my grandpa’s gun though I didn’t know enough about guns to know it was locked without ammo.
When I was seven someone said “Why don’t you ever talk?” and I felt this horrible heat go through me, sort of embarrassed but also anger and I wanted to say something back to her but couldn’t. I told that to my Mom a couple weeks ago and she didn’t know why it was such a big deal to me then, (like a turning point in my life), and she’s probably right.
When I was eleven, this one boy kissed me on the mouth in this trailer and I felt a similar horrible hot feeling and went and hid in the car, shaking. That was another ‘definitive point’ though I don’t know why.
When I was sixteen I thought things were changing because of 9/11 and I was shaken to the core. I wanted to help people and I sent money and things and I was outward focused but then it just went back to normal.
I have nothing to focus on. I am afraid of focus. Afraid of commitment. Afraid something might be required of me and people will see THIS side of me.
My mom assures me that lots of people like me, like older people in church, other people told her I was nice to talk to etc. (when the real reason I’m a ‘good listener’ is because I’m afraid to say anything). And I’m afraid that if they got close to me they’d know what I was really like. I don’t know how anyone can love me and I’m crying as I write this (I’ve always cried easily).
My father suffered from depression for many years and I’ve never totally forgiven him for it; it felt like abandonment, he was there, but not there, though it wasn’t his fault. I wanted him to be a MAN though and not lie around, and to keep a job longer than a year and a job that would actually pay for the house.
My sister is getting married soon and I’m afraid that people will compare her and me and see what a loser I am.
The only place I feel wonderful and at home is at my grandparents’, who live in the country and where my horses are.
I don’t want to be treated like I’m just like another patient, impersonal, which would happen if I went to a doctor (no money anyway). I don’t want to be condescended to, like people do who don’t really know what you’re feeling and can’t know. I don’t want to be scorned by people which is my worst fear.
I just feel stuck in life with nowhere to go,
nothing to recommend me.
What I dread most is finding out something is wrong with me and having to drag myself out of my comfort zone, fantasy world, to do something.
You probably all look down on me for this (worst is someone who has no excuse) but I am punishing myself. Maybe when I get lots of bad comments (or no comments!!!!!!!!) I will get the courage to go through with it.

May 10, 2010 at 10:03 pm
(343) robert davis says:

AM JUSY TUNE 67, mY VAINS ARE POPING OUT OF MY RIGHJT leg, there red line, coming down from right leg, I have to put hot pads on them all day.
What is cuseing it ?
I also have leg ulser’s there not healing due to my cerulation is poor, W hat can I do??

May 14, 2010 at 12:04 am
(344) English Teacher says:

You can start by learning how to spell.

May 15, 2010 at 9:54 pm
(345) JaineDoe says:

Reading other’s experiences offers me a bit of reassurance as I have always felt very similar emotions as each of you wrote about. As a child, I often felt that I didn’t belong here, and during my teen years, I attempted suicide so many times I lost count (only once did any one notice). I’ve given up on suicide and have decided to continue on this journey until my time is up. I have a fairly good life. A resonsible job, a little $$ in my pocket, a safe place to cal home, and surrounded by people who love me. Yet, I’m unhappy. I can’t even remember the last time I was happy. All I want to do is stay in my apartment where it’s safe and read, watch movies, clean etc. The real fear comes when I open my front door and walk out into the “real world”. Truth be told, I find this world so uncomfortable, and the people in it, so angry and sad, that I don’t want to be a part of it. I prefer to watch frm a distance. Despite being comfortable in my solidary dwelling, I know I should be out and meeting people, dating, going to concerts and living life. But I don’t want to for reasons unknown. I just want to stay where I am – forever. So, what’s wrong with me?

May 18, 2010 at 8:03 am
(346) Vivekanandan says:

Ena koduma sir idhu

May 23, 2010 at 6:52 am
(347) NeedToWant says:

I googled “what’s wrong with me” and got here too. I think, after reading a whole load of comments above, that a big reason in us all not being happy is that we don’t want to be happy. Is it coz it’s easier to be sad? Easier to complain? Easier to just give up? I think for me atleast, if I’m to be totally honest, that would be the reason. I get depressed and down so easily over small things. I had a 6 year relationship that broke down because he said I didn’t love myself enough, so how can I expect him to love me. That comment hurt, but was a big wakeup call. I’ve considered many times to see a psychiatrist, but I’ve been too embarassed. I guess my biggest fear is if I’m told I don’t have a condition and that it’s all in my head. So for the time being I’m going to try and fake it till I make it. No matter how badly I burn inside.

May 30, 2010 at 9:23 am
(348) Fred says:

I also typed what is wrong with me and google and found this website.

I live a relatively happy life. Perhaps there seems to be nothing wrong with my life, from the outside looking in.

I really do not feel that I am accepted for who I am. People find me weird. My sense of humour is just different from other people. What people think is funny, I don’t find it funny, and vice versa. Sometimes when I do certain things for fun, they think I’m trying to be funny or to seek attention. But I’m really just doing it for myself. Everyone just finds me weird. They don’t understand. I tried to talk to a few closer friends who may understand but they just don’t get it.

I live in a dorm with my 3 roommates who also think I’m weird. The one who is closest to me sometimes likes to curse on me and to criticize me in any way possible, saying that I suck everyday. In fact, except for my parents and my elder brother, I don’t think anyone else love me for who I am. I’m lucky to find a few who seem to find me tolerable but we’re now in different schools.

I’m hoping to find just one person who loves me for who I am, so I know I’m normal. I don’t have any problem accepting people for who they are, or at least to tolerate them at some cases. I just wish to get some someday.

May 30, 2010 at 10:41 pm
(349) josh says:

Eve, I don’t look down on you at all. I have a great family, a better life than any of my ancestors, and yet two years ago at age 16 I was sitting in my dad’s den with a loaded revolver against my temple, downing shots of whiskey to try to work up the nerve to do it. What stopped me from doing it was thinking about all the people who care about me. That’s the part of reality you have to pay attention to. Like you, I was trying to write a novel. I tried to invent a character to project my feelings into. It was nice sometimes to think of myself in this fantasy world, but it was a hollow pleasure, one that didn’t translate into any lasting feeling. I just started paying more attention to the ones around me, and I did my best to be nice to all of them. Mainly, I just kept living, waiting for it to get better, and keeping myself busy whenever I could. I went through periods where I couldn’t make myself do anything, just sat on the couch eating and watching whatever crap was on the tube. I was afraid to start working on any serious sort of accomplishment because I thought I was too much of a F*ck up to do anything. But that is never true. You can do great things, and I guarantee there is someone who would be lost without you. The potential for Depression is there in everyone, it just lies closer to the surface for some of us. I still have suicidal times, and I expect I always will, but they don’t last for months, weeks, or even days anymore. All I did was try to be more involved with the people who wanted to be involved with me. You need to be less critical of yourself, that invariably leads to lashing out at the ones who actually care. Not going far after college is definitely not all your fault, the economy is absolutely terrible right now, and we have a much harder time of it than our parents did, that’s for sure. As for romantic relationships, I really can’t see this from the same perspective as you, since I’m a boy, but I know my depression kept me away from girls, kept me from even trying for dates. Don’t give up on yourself, when people tell you you’re good, let yourself believe it, and talk to people. A fantasy world is fun, but it has no substance. you just haven’t found your place in this one yet. You will.

June 1, 2010 at 12:27 pm
(350) Eridani says:

here is my favorite video.
men being tortured helps you get your mind off things, doesn’t it?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rmEQkFU8W4

June 9, 2010 at 11:25 am
(351) E says:

What if writing is one of the things that makes me feel most fulfilled? What if it’s enough of an obsession I can’t stop doing it even if I try? What if I’m good at it, and people say so (teachers, friends and family and anonymous people on the internet)????????

June 15, 2010 at 8:53 pm
(352) Leila says:

Re: Eridani

” here is my favorite video.
men being tortured helps you get your mind off things, doesn’t it?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rmEQkFU8W4

Why Would you like Him being totured? Well, he is kinda Hot though.

June 19, 2010 at 11:00 pm
(353) Erin says:

I feel all of the above every day of my life. I am young and yet feel so old and close to death. Is there a cure?

June 28, 2010 at 9:47 pm
(354) MARISOL HUERTA says:

I’ve joined the club. I googled what is wrong with me. I have no money and the little money i had i gambled it away thinking i was going to double it and some how i lost every cent. WHAT IS WRONG W/ ME. I can’t seem to be responsible enough. I’m never on time, I’m a bad mother, I don’t do anything right, I’m always sleepy. I wish i could cry all day. I wish I wasnt this way.

June 30, 2010 at 4:12 am
(355) tsering says:

i feel soo sad for myself sometimes.. i want to see the good in everyhting that i have but what can i do when all i can feel is this helplessness?? !!! My family are really good to me but these mood swings esp. exacerbated by recent events in my life have left me feeling like total loser… i have no idea wht i want in life anymore, two years ago i would have answered all your questions but now this feeling is thrittling me…

June 30, 2010 at 4:05 pm
(356) No One says:

I dont kno if i have Bipolar, i dont kno if i have a depression disorder. all i kno is that im angry all the time for no reason. ill just have these mood swings that i cant control. my family is the most amazing family u could ask for yet i still feel like im not good enough. i fight with my bf for no reason.. like when he lets out my dogs, why would i get mad at him for that? they need to go out, there dogs..

i cant explaine what im feeling, one second im happy as can be. the next, im as angry as can be. but i donno what set me off to be that angry??

im so confussed with myself its driving me nuts! i try to mention to a couple of friends about what im feeling and they tell me “its all in my head”. or that they have other firends with bipolar and i dont fit in that catagory..

i want to go to the doctor but im scared that hell just say the same thing. “its all in my head”

ughh im so frustrated! What Is Wrong With Me!!!

January 19, 2011 at 12:56 pm
(357) lynn says:

i feel the EXACT same way, literally.
you’ve explained it to a teee.

what is going on with us???

July 9, 2010 at 1:36 am
(358) realwolverine says:

#263 “Again and Again” dtd 9.19.2009 I think you’re on to something with what you’ve written, thank you for writing this, wow I wrote 9.6.2009 on my Bday and it’s almost a year since then….seem to have more “better”??? daze than then, but root is still most prevalent – again, Again and Again, I truly think you have something here. I sincerely hope everyone here feels a spark of hope & happiness as trite as that may sound!

July 9, 2010 at 1:48 am
(359) realwolverine says:

#339 “eve” on may 10th 2009 no looking down on you at all, I truly hope you will not feel so awful any more, as useless as this sounds, I do hope & pray for you, you aren’t alone, none of us are, I know it doesn’t make us have this feeling ‘go away” but I’m finding it does reassure me some, altho I hate to think of others feeling so bleak like this also.

July 24, 2010 at 4:45 am
(360) renee says:

I’m seeing an an ex phsycologist who has a theory that I am still in the process of learning and putting to practise some mental exercises. In short , he is teaching me about the scientifics of the brain. We have a part in the brain that is there for our survival , for eg if we were cavemen this part of the brain would help us to kill to survive. This is the same part of the brain that causes us so much trouble in our modern day. If you think about it, if we were all told a tsunami was on the way in 24 hrs, how many of us are going to sit there and complain we are too depressed to get to higher ground ? I think it is a theory worth researching. I am no expert but I thought this was worth a mention. I am managing a lot better these days , obviously I still feel down now and then which is my reason for ending up on this page. I’m hoping to continue with the brain exercises and who knows. I also believe in prayer.

God bless you all.

July 25, 2010 at 10:35 pm
(361) Toya says:

i’ve dealt with depression and social anxiety for years, but i’ve come to this page after feeling sad today and typed “what is wrong with me” as well like you others. i’ve been starting to think i might be bipolar, so i was surprised when it brought me to this page. glad to know i’m not alone. i will say a quick prayer that God helps us all to be able to deal with this disorder or be able to afford the counseling and medication that we need. Amen.

July 26, 2010 at 6:59 am
(362) Anonymous says:

Even my family always say “Oh, you’re just depressed.”

Well DUH! I suffer from depression. Not just “feeling down” on a lousy day.

People really don’t understand what “depressed” actually means. They think it means I can’t beat a video game and I’m a little miffed about it. Or that I’m upset if I missed my favorite TV show. Wrong!

It means I might just get the knife and start carving myself up again. Maybe I’ll go through with my suicide this time. Maybe I’ll haul off and slug them in the face for being so damn dumb.

I’m in my twenties now, and they just act like depression is a teenager thing, so they’re like “Grow up”. It doesn’t f**king work like that.

Some days I feel fine, but on more and more days I feel like I have completely lost my f**king mind! If I don’t get sorted out soon, then eventually, maybe even years later, I am going to explode and burn this whole damn planet to ashes!

July 28, 2010 at 12:55 am
(363) Josh says:

I have bi polar disorder

July 30, 2010 at 12:35 pm
(364) Torzi says:

It doesn’t matter who you are or where you live. I’ve tried to escape (from myself?) by going to different countries or places. I’m so confused I don’t know even know what I want. I do think that perhaps I’m severely depressed but I can’t wallow in it. I have kids to take care of and work to do. Can’t afford to stay in bed, like I would like. I drag my family with to all these weird places, hoping it will be better somewhere else. The change helps for awhile, and then its back to square one. I’m tired and if I allowed myself to, I would probably cry for days and days. I don’t even know what to ask for…

August 11, 2010 at 1:48 am
(365) cheyenne says:

fell that way toooo

August 16, 2010 at 2:33 am
(366) d-rock says:

It doesn’t seem like there is anything inherently wrong with any of us. We all have logical reasons to why we feel so badly about our lives, the common ones being relationship angst or feeling like something is missing.

What’s wrong is how we deal with these problems. It seems all we are doing is bashing ourselves or blaming others. What we need to do is take a positive step toward resolving our problems, either by conquering our fears on our own (which could be really difficult), or getting help from someone we trust, be it a close friend, family member, or professional counselor.

So far I have been solving my problems on my own, but it’s almost too difficult at times. I want someone to talk to about my problems. The hard part for me has been choosing the right person to open up to, considering almost all people I have opened up to have ridiculed/hurt me/taken advantage of me when I showed my vulnerability.

That’s probably why I have developed a cynical nature to my personality in my later years. I have no one I can trust. I have to resort to the anonymity of the internet via this forum to share my inner most feelings. It’s sad, really. I’d rather share my feelings with strangers than the people I’m closest to out of fear of being hurt again.

August 24, 2010 at 1:51 am
(367) shawn says:

because this is anonymous i am going to be completely honest.

i told my boyfriend last night “this is the happiest i have ever been with myself and my life and yet i am not happy. and this is probably most people’s low point.”

i can’t explain it (which is why i, too, googled what is wrong with me). i am happy with every aspect of my life. i am happy with my current living situation, i have a great job that i like and pays really well, i have a loving family, i have great friends, i am happy with how i look and even lost the few pounds i wanted to (and am now leaning towards being too thin again i think). there is no specific “thing” wrong with my life.

the one thing maybe that bothers me the most is that im afraid i am a lot uglier inside than i am outside and im afraid others do/will realize it.

i have no trouble getting boyfriends, but i do have trouble keeping them because eventually they start to see my “crazy” side. i just want to be “normal” and “stable” so they will enjoy my company. i don’t want to be irritable and hypersensitive and think bad thoughts about others and myself and throw tantrums and feel angry and hostile and then sad and regretful.

i am so afraid i will never get better and therefore will be old and alone one day. i don’t think anyone will ever marry me the way i am (at least no one worthwhile). i just want to be a good friend, a good sister, a good girlfriend. but the older i get (i am now 28), the less likely i think i will ever be able to.

and THAT is what makes me so sad sometimes i just don’t want to be here anymore.

i’m just so disappointed with myself.

August 30, 2010 at 11:39 pm
(368) Anna says:

I don’t believe in depression. I believe in a country full of people who don’t feel they’re life is deep or interesting enough, so they have to throw in some emotional problems and pills to make it more interesting. There is no scientific data to support the clinical problem “depression” there is however billions to be made off of the pills that often make tens of thousands commit suicide.

September 2, 2010 at 2:56 am
(369) Zane says:

I don’t feel like I am depressed. The Quote at the top I feel it fits me perfectly. I know I have not had that bad of a life I just wonder why throughout the years, I find myself sitting in my room wondering where are all the people that said and say they love me.

And what can I do to stop this from happening again?

September 18, 2010 at 3:23 am
(370) marion says:

It is just like human to feel the wat we do at times,”what’s wrong with me.” I just felt like typing this and a whole list of depression, bipolar thing just came up. Well, I am a type who don’t believe in medication or sickness. It is all in the mind. Life is so full of up’s and down’s and those situations at times just causes this question to rise esp, when sadness conquers. Whatever it is, I just try to keep positive though it can be killing at times. Life is never a straight line, and I just want to keep persevering.

September 18, 2010 at 3:30 am
(371) Marion Matthias says:

Sometimes I feel what’s wrong with me but I don’t choose to dwell on this thought. ciorcumstances and relationship in life just drives me to think this way at times. I do not believe in sickness and medication.It is all in the mind and I have control over myself, emotions, thoughts and feelings and I am never gining to give up at any time although moments can be very depressing. It’s all in the mind.

September 20, 2010 at 11:41 pm
(372) Kellan says:

I read a few, some of them I can’t relate with, the early college, new city, new place ones. Some of the others about being alone I can definitely get behind, I could fucking sleep until my back went out, but I love being with people when I am, no social anxiety or anything. I can’t pick up my textbooks to study to save my life, but want to have a healthy living. I have dark circles under my eyes probably due to my improper sleep schedule, and I get way too much sleep. I’m single and living alone, but desire to be with someone desperately. I feel right now at the age of 26, like I have no purpose to live, no this is not suicidal as I could never bring myself to hurting my loved ones. Death has never been on my mind, but recently like 4 people that I know(I’m not necessarily close to them) have died, and I wonder about death and what it’s like and where we go on a daily basis. I have barely any inner monologue like some people say they have, an imagination or thought process if you will, I am fucking BLANK, but at the same time I am very intellectual when it comes to sophisticated conversation. I have no passion for anything, I am very laid back, and normally rely on others to pry me out of the house. I went to a physician once, and told him my symptoms, he prescribed me some medication, and after two days it scared the shit out of me! I then felt suicidal, so I discontinued use. I told my physician that I had not exhausted all options in my pursuit of happiness, I still continue to smoke pot and cigarettes everyday, the pot just makes me numb and forget my symptoms, but truthfully probably brings on more emptiness, probably the same with the cigarettes. I suppose if you want a change in your life, and you are that desperate you should probably quit putting things in your body (pot, cigarettes, alcohol etc.), I really have no room to bitch and complain, I am putting well known depressants in my body everyday, but then wonder “what is wrong with me?”

September 27, 2010 at 9:20 am
(373) shraddha says:

I too feel the same.

October 7, 2010 at 10:39 am
(374) stefan jovanovic says:

Life, it seems, will fade away
Drifting further every day
Getting lost within myself
Nothing matters, no one else
I have lost the will to live
Simply nothing more to give
There is nothing more for me
Need the end to set me free
Things not what they used to be
Missing one inside of me

February 2, 2011 at 1:39 am
(375) lori says:

Wow this brought back alot of memories. I had thought A good friend of mine had written this poem back in high school. I really miss her. Thanks for the memories. I now understand how she was feeling way back then I miss you Mary!!!

October 11, 2010 at 1:20 pm
(376) Levi says:

I, like most of you, googled “what is wrong with me?”
As I was reading through your comments, I was looking for the answer, no one seems to have it. The only thing reading the comments seemed to do was make me feel worse. So I sat here & I thought, & I thought, & I thought, & what I came up with is really quite simple, ask some one for help. It may seem hard, but how much worse can you get? Just talk to someone you know is trustworthy, if don’t know one, then read this http://www.bible.ca/f-Depression.htm

October 15, 2010 at 11:49 am
(377) primepeng says:

I can’t believe that I found something quite a bit similar and still happening to me. I’m reaching 29. I have told myself to change from my stubborn habit, that just keep doing it over ten years. I really don’t want to think that it’s too late to change now. It’s interesting that many people like me googled this but after reading this page it makes a large difference between your expected reply and the actual problem that you are seeking. I sincerely agree that I have some of the symptoms above but it still doesn’t describe my actual problem. I really wanted to talk to someone about my problem. I think I’m the best doctor myself and should stop looking for other answers. thanks.

October 22, 2010 at 5:53 am
(378) LOWE says:

HI EVERY ONE… last comment is dated 15th Oct.!!! Nothing to say??? Come on guys, let’s talk about our fellow primepeng,,, he says: “I think I’m the best doctor myself and should stop looking for other answers”… wauh! That’s strong… on one hand one side is our self-confidence but on other hand believe me, all we need help at a time of our lives…

October 23, 2010 at 8:13 pm
(379) BOBs says:

i feel the same way. I always feel horrible but now i know that there are other people who are also like me. Makes me feel better that I’m not alone after all.

October 24, 2010 at 1:20 pm
(380) sara says:

so many other people feel the same. i still cant find the words to explain whats wrong with me but you guys put it in the perfect words. hope you all find the way to be happy.

November 1, 2010 at 12:14 am
(381) Lauren says:

Though I’ve had many days where I feel hopeless and lost, today seemed to take the cake. I merely googled “what is wrong with me” as a last resort, many psychologists and doctors haven’t been able to pinpoint, thus making me feel even worse and worse. On the outside, I’m your normal 20 year old college student who loves life and fun, however, inside it feels like I don’t even know myself. A couple months back, I would say that I was overwhelmingly blessed with friends and family that love me. Today though, I feel so down that I can’t even seem to really recognize that. This google search was a last ditch effort to maybe draw some conclusions about my seemingly “fucked up” state of mind. I was beyond ready to just give up on myself in the worse sense possible. But thanks to you guys, I’m realizing I’m not alone and maybe the things I’m feeling are just normal growing pains, part of growing up. As sad as it is, your words saved my life guys. So thank you.

November 2, 2010 at 3:15 pm
(382) Chris says:

I feel empty. I have no thoughts. Its like half of my brain is gone. I can sit and stare at a point on a wall and be perfectly content but not happy. I never feel happy. It can’t be bipolar because i only have one pole. Its endless regret, feelings of inadequacy. I have this growing embarrassment for who I am and everything that I have done. Nothing makes sense and I feel so stupid. I used to be smart, funny, charming, and generally likable. now I’m obsessive, dull, and unsocial. My surrounds aren’t so bad. Nice apartment. Nice car. I can seem grateful but all in all I just want to end everything. I do have a dream. I wish to be in complete isolation. Only myself to care for so I have no one to disappoint. Maybe its just hardcore depression. I feel embarassed to see a doctor and my family will think I’m a freak. I don’t know what to do

November 3, 2010 at 4:35 am
(383) MyzzKayla21 says:

google? i went to yahoo n got this site :) im kayla 21 i think im bipolar or got some kinda mood problem…..wow. still cant believe this site im loven it u all understand me but one problem i really have is this anxiety stuff being scared to do certain things or go certain places. then i get this courage like yea i can do that and this… yall understand me?? i feel so fukin crazy man i try to talk to my mum about it but she doesnt understand because she doesnt really know ya no?? i dunno what im trying to get at its just that im crazy and i thank everyone that can relate…… if neone wants to take or give ne advice feel free… i curse alot so watever thanks guys :)

November 4, 2010 at 1:09 am
(384) jd says:

i just dont know just dont seemed to get anything in my right

just t know what to do / no wait know what to do but dont know what am i waiting for

November 7, 2010 at 7:24 pm
(385) edgar says:

does anyone take drugs, or drink alcohol?the issue we all have i feel this is more visible when impaired.

November 16, 2010 at 9:33 am
(386) gabriela says:

i agree with everything i have just read. i always feel alone because i dont think anyone else feels this way. though it sucks to be like this, im glad that other people understand and that i am not the only one. i wish i had friends who i could talk to but i think they might call me crazy if i tried to explain this to them. i have no family and i have a lot of friends yet i feel like they dont know the real me and its like i dont have any. im starting therapy on thursday though :] so hopefully things get better. this helped me a lot!

November 17, 2010 at 3:23 am
(387) Jacob says:

************Reading all of these comments about what i just asked myself, makes me realize what I have been thinking all the time; that there is nothing wrong with us rather than everyone else. The kind of people that hurt, scare, discomfort and abuse anyone else in any way, I think is what truely bothers people to be around; maybe even so much as to do nothing in most of their life, in fear of others.*********** I think this may be the root of all my problems………………………..but I also know what may be the solution. **************Thinking about others more than yourself. Caring for others any chance you get, instead of putting yourself first. Helping others and maybe even worryying for others can pull yourself out of thinking you are alone. *************** I know only caring about yourself can be very unhealthy which is the root to my solution. If everyone would care for evry one more than themselves and act more caringly then this problem may have not arisen in the first place. I feel the same as basically everyone on here, and i have noticed that that is a start.

I ask myself why I am living each day. For anyone reading this it may not apply to you, but i’ve always felt it would.

From the very beginning of this article I knew there was nothing wrong with me.

November 28, 2010 at 10:48 pm
(388) Colleen H says:

Like Greg, I typed what is wrong with me into google and found this. It scared me how this pinpoints me exactly. I force smiles and laughs around family and friends, but I’m lonely and miserable. I sleep all the time, but I’m sluggish and tired always. My friends and family are always telling me they love me and always want to be around me, but theres something wrong with me. I feel alone and that everyone hates me.
Thank you for sharing it makes me feel better to know im not alone :)

November 30, 2010 at 1:51 am
(389) MyzzKayla21 says:

i live in fear everyday. my mind races i think about EVERYTHING what if this happens when it happens why would it happen blah blah i hate it. everyday i wake up i wish i cold ju either sdtay asleep or never wake up again. my parents cant stand me. i know my sisters cant either…. i try to explain to them that im sorry for my outbursts or states of aggitation/depression…. but its lik they dont seem to understand ya no? they tend to throw my “fake apologies” in my face everytime something happens.. i jus dunno anymore……………………………………..
gabriel jacob and collen i agree with u as well as the rest of te ppl on here… i feel alone. im scared. hopeless.. helpless… cant sleep…. moodswings out of whack…. no meds at all…. if i get ahold of meds like zanax or valium i buy them up to self medicate as well as drinking beer or smoking weed…… it all fuks up my days and nights…o how else to eat sleep or fukig live in this hell hole sometimes guys…. if anybody feels me hit me up or something….

December 5, 2010 at 3:37 pm
(390) Othman says:

My god…

All of these people…!?

I have a pretty much successful life. But one day as I felt strangely lonely, I typed “what’s wrong with me?” into Google just to find that there are so many people out there really suffering and looking for someone to help them … to love them.. and tell them they are not alone.

My problem is nothing comparing to some of what I read.

My best wishes to all of you, enduring in silence , to have a brighter and happy future.

December 6, 2010 at 8:20 am
(391) Albert says:

same here.. googled and landed here..i like the fact that this blog started in 2007 and its still continuing.. should I be happy that I’m not alone and there are others like me or sad that there are others like me and no one has found an answer yet. I’m a 26 yr old.. completed my post graduation last year.. still dont have a job.. lost my girlfriend whom I loved very much and still do.. she left me without so much a thought..even though I was honest and faithful and we were a happy couple.. its been 6 months.. and its been downhill for me ever since.. I lost all my good friends … guess they were sick of me.. coz I was depressed all the time and still am.. felt like committing suicide but hasnt found the guts to do it.. I dont feel happy about anything anymore.. I gaze at the moon thinking about how’s everything going to be okay but it doesn’t.. I try to keep my mind occupied but these thoughts haunt me again.. I’m only trying to get a job so I can pay for my own drinks instead of having to ask for money to my parents.. nothing matters anymore.. I try to reach out to my other friends through facebook but that isnt working too..I dont know what should I do. .I had it all planned for me.. a nice life.. and it was.. until everything started falling to pieces..I just sleep the whole day and dont talk much anymore.. I do have few friends but I cant talk about this stuff to them.. I dont want them to think that I’m weird and lose the remaining lot..nobody wants to be around some miserable clod.. its the festive season.. and its going to make me miserable again…

December 10, 2010 at 9:46 pm
(392) byron says:

albert

you typed exactly what i would have. you are in the same position i was a few years ago. it does get better and worse and better. i will tell you from experience that drugs and alcohol numb the pain but it doesnt help. i needed a way out and literally woke up hungover and decided i was going to do something to get out so i walked into a recruiters office and said i want to jump out of planes. 2 weeks later i was in the army and i dont regret it at all. for me it surrounded me with mostly good people and gave me a distraction. im not saying you should join the army im just saying you need a way out- a distraction. hobbies help keep your mind off of how much life sucks and how things didnt turn out as planned. now i will take low paying jobs just for the experience of it. it is entertaining to learn new things. thats all i can think of to say to help.

December 17, 2010 at 3:53 am
(393) Jude says:

It’s weird how I landed here. I didn’t even know what this was when I clicked here, it took me a good 2 minutes to find out. My head is so messed up. I can’t seem to understand anything that goes on anymore. I feel so clueless, which makes me feel left out, which makes me feel so alone. I can’t seem to get people. I know I can’t live without them, but I don’t want to live with them. I purposefully push everyone away. All of them. My parents, brothers, friends, girls… I do this all on purpose, for reasons I don’t understand, from causes I’ve never truly comprehended. It has to be my sensitivity. That’s what my mom says. People say one little comment that I take very personally, and I let it pierce me, and I don’t let go. It hurts so much. I let go of all the trust in that person, and I ignore them. I know it hurts them, too, but they get over it. And I can’t. I can’t get over things. Because I’m so damn sensitive. I feel so effeminate. I can’t “man up.” I hate people that “man up,” I hate people who tell me to “man up.” I don’t get people, and I haven’t found anyone who is at the same place I am. Even if I do find them, it wouldn’t matter. The people who I want in my life aren’t, the people I don’t want are always trying to get in. And because both of these things happen, I am totally alone on the inside. I have no clue why, either. This might sound so selfish, because I actually do have people in my life, like a mom and dad and brother. But I can’ relate to them. It doesn’t work like that, anymore. And I feel so horrible for all these sob stories I’m reading on here. Those people went through some challenges. Not me. These stories make me feel more alone. It makes me feel guilty and angry and more confused. And I don’t. Know. Why.
I’m sorry. This is a bunch of my scattered thoughts I typed.

December 18, 2010 at 10:39 am
(394) jane says:

I typed ‘whats wrong with me’ like everyone else because what I have I can’t explain – I am hypersensitive to everything and everyone, my memory seems to be worse than and I can relate to all the comments but feel so much like Chris ( 377) above. I long to be the carefree, sociable person with a so much to say than who I have become. I have no confidence, I feel inadequate and look around at people wondering how they manage to fit in a full days work and a life and still smile. I feel nervous in front of people to the point of thinking I am going to colapse and don’t know how to get back the me that once was. I don’t drink a lot ( feel worse for it), have tried anti depressants in the past but tablet taking is not for me. What is wrong with me?

December 30, 2010 at 3:49 am
(395) Stephanie says:

My whole life I’ve preferred to be at home rather than be around people. I go to work and always feel I’m not doing things as well as I could be or as well as everyone else seems to be doing. If my boss wants to see me or I get a call on the phone, I’m always scared it’s something bad, or something I’ve done wrong. Everyone else seems like they’ve got it pretty well together and I can’t figure out why I can’t get my life under control. I’m a Christian and sometimes I feel like I am the only one being tested. Everyone is in on it, to see if I can be good enough. I’ve gone to church, I know the Bible inside and out. I’ve read multiple self-help books, prayed, watched tv programs, listened to radio programs to try and find the one thing that will make everything ok. I have a fairly good life. A good job. Great kids. I tell myself, “You are not dying of cholera in Haiti.” Why can’t I be happy? It’s easy to blame other things. I don’t have a very good husband, but then what’s wrong with me that I chose someone like that? That’s why I typed in “What’s wrong with me?” I’ve always felt that I am ok. I’m smart, nice looking, sensible, but lately I’ve started thinking, “Maybe there is something wrong with me and I just can’t see it!”

January 3, 2011 at 7:47 pm
(396) Derick says:

Thanks for sharing ^; i feel the same way & im in my 20′s. i believe it’s just a phase so i don’t question it, neither should you. enjoy and consider everything happening around you. don’t force yourself in to anything; as they say “just go with the flow.” :D

January 6, 2011 at 11:23 am
(397) Blake says:

like minded people. I dont know really what to say. all these people with the same problems. its more than coincidence. why do so many people feel this way. human flaw, bad parenting, bad childhood, scars, not popular, I dont know. I have a problem myself and so does my dad. i spent my whole life trying not to be like him and ill be damned if im not just like him. which leads me to believe its a mental disorder. I have a hard time controlling myself. I cant hold a job down but its not b/c im a crappy worker. I just lose my cool and that usually the sametime i lose my job. never been arrested, no record. I believe in God but he has helped as much as possible. I dont believe in talking about it or sharing. I dont believe in evals or test, more a less a sign of weakness but i just cant keep living this way. Something has got to give. Its more than just oh there are people like me. I can’t even talk to people nor do i want to. People will turn on u in a heartbeat. havent had a girl in my life in forever. i dont know….are there programs that pay for your help…cuz i have no job or insurance?

January 11, 2011 at 8:25 pm
(398) lucas says:

i can’t believe the amount of people like me.
this is a seriuos question, but does anybody know a good child phsycolgist for bi-polar.
i’m 13, and i thought i was insane, the sleepless nights, the persistant feeling that i can’t trust anyone.
and the figgiting. lost so many people because of the figgiting. parents just think i’m wierd that way.
i ask for a phycolgist because i don’t need any persciption drugs running through my viens fighting something i might not even have.
if your reading this, your not alone, look at all the people above me. there is hope, i hope.

January 15, 2011 at 3:17 am
(399) Shoaib says:

I don’t know how, but i too searched the same thing and got here, bcoz i m not feeling great now.
But yes on a serious note, i guess the problem is in our minds, if we stop thinking the way we are we would feel happier and grateful with whatever we have. This world has become into some kind of a virus, where its always like – “you have got less, take more!”.
i think the absolute solution is to feel Spiritual and feel happy with whatever God has bestowed on you, as compared to the less fortunate ones.
I feel so de-stressed typing this only. I guess, i have gotten over my weird feeling now.. :P :D
i feel so happy now, and more rejuvenated.
Thanks all for sharing your views. :)
“THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU”,
<<>>

January 24, 2011 at 10:12 pm
(400) David says:

Weird, I typed “Why am I so great?” into Google and it led me here. I think my keyboard must be faulty! Just joking I typed those same damn words that saw the first line of the last 1000 posts skimmed through and half ignored!

My story summed up by all your stories, some so similar it felt almost relieving knowing I’m not on my own.

I started feeling like this when I was around 15-16, I suppose (lots of ups and downs) as I got older the lows started taking over and the highs, infrequent as they are, were sort of ruined by me thinking (or even acknowledging) that I’m enjoying myself. The insecurities soon creep in and I find myself back down in dumps.

I feel as if I can’t really connect with anyone. Socially, I’ve just gotten worse and worse. In the right surroundings with the right people at the right time I can come out of my shell so to speak. When this happens I’m not thinking about it, I’m just doing it, living it, and with no time to think. Those times are rare though because it seems I’m thinking all the time!

Don’t know who it was who said it near the top but “I’m thinking all the time, I think about thinking!” Haha that sums it up alright!

January 24, 2011 at 10:14 pm
(401) David says:

One on one I just can’t seem to “entertain” I’ll be thinking about what to say to get some conversation going, then I’ll think about how that’ll come across to that person and then ultimately get turned off saying it. I can feel the awkwardness of it all. I can talk at length about things I love, like music and football, these are things I really love and really know so it’s easy to talk about. But when it comes to the normal every day conversation, the random stuff, stuff you can’t reherse in your head, I fall flat on my face, I think, because I don’t know me or my place in this world like I do my music!

I some weed and have done a bit of other drugs but regular or anything, I don’t do coke or anything. Just some spliffs to take the edge off, I know it doesn’t do me any favours in the long run but I’m past thinking about the long run. I don’t feel I will ever have a happy life so I’m quite happy to just do the small things that I find some solace in, even if it is detrimental to me.

I have the odd pain here and there which leads me to thinking I might have like a blood clot or a tumour or something. I don’t even care enough to see if I am healthy, I feel quite happy to just go with the flow and go when I go.

I’m not religious at all, I have sort of nihilistic views on life as a whole and how insignificant it all is. That doesn’t help either, I can’t change my beliefs though and in some way I envy those who turn to God or whatever for a bit of hope. I just feel like I am damned no matter what I do and I’m of no significance so I don’t really value my life at all. Shameful when there’s people out there who have nothing at all and will soon have their lives ended prematurely, people who’d give anything to have any sort of life.

January 24, 2011 at 10:15 pm
(402) David says:

I’m 24 now by the way. I still haven’t even had a girlfriend, I can’t really connect with some of my best friends, never mind talk and connect with a girl which is daunting even for relatively confident people.

Another thing is my confidence is so easily knocked, sometimes I just need to be involved and the confidence comes but the slightest remark, laugh or whatever and I will use it against me in a paranoid way. I’m just not mentally tough, my Dad who I’m sure experienced plenty of the same symptoms as me is tough as it gets so I think he can motor on and function in the world but I just can’t do it.

I think I’ll leave it at that. Glad I found this page as it has resulted in a certain degree of acceptance for me. All the experiences, thoughts and advice people have shared has helped a lot. It’s helped me understand that little bit more about who I am.

I’ll add that I won’t really consider medication. I agree with that person who said chemicals aren’t the answer and for some people, and I believe I am one of those people, medication is the wrong route. I reckon I’m sort of more vulnerable or susceptable to side-effects and I honestly think they’d mess things up further.

Thanks for reading, hope that all made sense!

January 25, 2011 at 11:46 pm
(403) Lucas again says:

second time I’ve tried to commit suicide.help!!!!!

January 29, 2011 at 11:08 pm
(404) Barbara says:

I’m so sorry that things have gotten so bad that you are considering suicide. I was there myself only a few months ago. I know how you feel. If things have gotten so bad that you have actually made attempts you need to find help from a professional. I started seeing a psychologist a little while ago and it made all the difference in the world. I think it really did save my life. I know in one of your posts you were asking for help finding a psychologist, there are tons of resources online that can help you find psychologists in your area. Where are you located?

Here is one website I have found that lists psychologists in different areas http://www.goodtherapy.org/find-psychologists.html

Also there is a website called thehopeline. Its a suicide hotline where you can chat live online with a councelor pretty much 24/ 7 . Its really helpful for when you are feeling desperate and don’t know what to do, I still use it sometimes. the link is
http://www.thehopeline.com

If cutting and pasting it doesn’t work you can google the hopeline and it is the first link on the page. I know life sucks now, but it really can get better. I’m not recovered yet by any means but I feel a whole lot better than I have in a long time.

February 4, 2011 at 2:31 am
(405) Annon says:

I didn’t type in “what is wrong with me”, i typed in ” I have tried everything but i am never happy. ” …. and its true…

…. i have a boyfriend of almost 1.5 yrs who treats me well, i have been overseas several times, i have a very financially stable family, i have good friends, i have just moved to a big city on the beach in a cute as house, i have my own car, i am just about to persue a modelling career, but i am also about to fail a health degree… but begin a fashion design degree…..
i have felt this way for 4 or so yrs now. its a feeling of being so lost, alone, invisible. I feel like i have no one but i have plenty of friends and family. i feel like i am going no where in life, i feel like i have accomplished nothing in life, i feel ugly despite the fact i draw eyes and compliments everywhere. i feel life is so hard, and i cant remember the last time i thought i am happy, that would be about two years ago now.
i feel like my life is over. ive thought about suicide, thought its the easy way out, but then always beat mysself up and make myself feel worse because i cant bring myslef to do it, (because im such a weak person)…..life seems sso hard. i feel like i am going no where…. i think with generations to come, the biggest cause of depression will be the feeling of being directionless and alone.

February 1, 2011 at 3:39 pm
(406) beep says:

dun’ worry folks, in fact instead, goto this link and see what is your personality type.

http://www.41q.com/

February 9, 2011 at 4:48 pm
(407) Jenna says:

Interesting that so many of us feel the same way … just look at how long this thread has gone on. I moved back to my home state to marry my HS boyfriend – whom I had not seen in some 35 years but found again on that social network thing. It seemed like a good idea at the time – but it’s been a disaster. Now, I wake up feeling hopeful, only to find the day drags me down. I have great kids, I am otherwise healthy, and even though I am currently unemployed, I am generally optimistic about finding work before my exchequer goes down to nothing. I still own a house, I own a car and I still have a few close friends. So, yeah, while there is a lot not going right, there’s a lot not going too badly.

So, why do I feel like crap by late afternoon almost everyday? What IS wrong with me?

February 25, 2011 at 9:34 pm
(408) chico says:

“SURREALITY”, IS AN EFFECT OF BEING REAL, IN A RAL ENVIRONMENT. Surreality is a real place, and is the effect not the cause. The secret is to find the door in, not the door out. The only door out, is the same door out of nature,(death), but the door in, is the door to a most”surreal” lifestyle. Chat with me, about (“SEVEN HABITS”). I have surreality color coded in 10 colors and an infinite vatriety of shades. I know about the hallucinations, in all five senses. I know of the spiritual trials, the financial problems, the lack of activism, due to paranoia from being alone here, the lack of education, due to a lack of feedback, the fear of being a naturally real being, in a surreal mind,the economic woes, of the afflictewd singularity, and the love of music, because it makes emotional sense, (soothe the savage breast). Count them and yoiu will see a pattern of seven common problems. Join me and never be alone again. radiowwww@yahoo.com

February 28, 2011 at 3:56 am
(409) Jack says:

Wow! I can’t believe at how many people have posted on this page. I always that I was not the only one feeling this way but to see it after typing 5 simple words puts it into perspective.

I am a gay man that never finished university because of my constant need to please other people. I have loved many times, and lost many friends, but in the end I still put the blame on myself for why straight guys have such a problem with my sexuality or why some people are so put off by me or why I can’t help my family from fucking itself up.

I AM SICK OF IT!

I keep telling myself that the one with the problem is not me, but those closed minded people, but it all boils back down to: ” what is wrong with me?” “did I do something wrong to offend them?” “am I really that bad of a person to be around?” “what do I need to change about myself to make a connection?”

You know what? May be I am. May be it is me. But it doesn’t make it right for people to abandon you being who you are!!!

It’s not right!

(cont’d)…

February 28, 2011 at 3:57 am
(410) Jack says:

…. (cont’d)
All in all, you are responsible for your happiness. Not your family, your friends, your ex-bf or ex-gf, and definitely not that next person you meet that ends up treating you in a way that you would not like to be treated… it is YOU!

I am not saying go crazy, and start taking what you want whenever you want. I am saying to focus on what you want to achieve in life and don’t let anyone run fast enough to catch you until you reach that goal!!!

AND screw those jerks that do not want to give you the time of day! There are 6 billion more people out there and at least one of them will have the heart to believe in you as much as you will believe in them.

BTW… I believe what most of us may be feeling is EXISTENTIAL ANGST. You may want to read up on it because it may answer a few questions. At the moment I am reading Sophie’s World by Jostein Gaarder. It is a historical anthology of philosophy that narates it in novel form. Great read, and you find your answers there.

Cheers!

March 3, 2011 at 11:37 am
(411) laura says:

I feel changed, so jaded. I used to be lighthearted and silly then the “growing up thing” came along and burst my bubble along with my fathers death. He was my rock. he has been gone for 13 years now and i still feel alone. My mother died when i was 4 at the age of 42 and my father lived to be 94. I am now 47 never married, I am in a relationship with a 32 year-old for 8 years now. I moved to a different state with him and i can’t find the kind of people i have surrounded myself with in the past. Strong smart, and honest people. So i just stay to mayself and have no real friends except my dogs and my partner of course. This is beginning to drive him crazy. I am trying to heal myself thru prayer and keeping my mind busy. This winter has taken its toll on me. I feel I was born in the wrong century.

March 6, 2011 at 5:44 am
(412) Lainee says:

I used to wake each day hoping that it will be different than the one before, yet my smile and the person i portray myself as is happy and loved by most, so why should it be any different. It is in the privacy of my home that i verbally and mentally abuse myself. I am my worst enemy. I cant seem to wake loving myself as i pray each and every night that i will.
Do i want to kill myself, of course not, i have much to live for.
I am loved, i am loving and i desperately want to be completely appreciative of all that i have been given in this life. Yet i cant.
I know my thoughts are wrong yet i am controlled by them, and telling it to a doctor makes me feel somehow not in control of this mind and body that i was given to exist in.
Im tired of being medicated, tired of the pills taking all that is good in me so i can stop the verbal lashings my own mind throws at me.
yet it is a path that most of us have to take, a path of taking this and taking that till that one day we wake with nothing else in our head than the sound of our alarm clock reminding us that we are given another day to breathe, to love, to make changes and yes, to love the voices in our head.
Ive been depressed, unloving of myself, my life for a good portion of my exsistance. im inclined to say , that sometimes even god makes mistakes.

part1

March 6, 2011 at 5:47 am
(413) Lainee says:

call it bad genetics, call it a situation in life that your mind just cant cope with, self pity, a sense of loathing what you’ve been given in life. What ever the reason, whatever the voices in your head say, there is an out, a silence, a happy ending. It just takes you waking and wanting it more this one particular day than the rest.
Ive been there, Ive lived it, my children and my family have all been affected by it.
Tomorrows a new day and we all deserve to like the voices within, we owe it to ourselves and to our loved ones to wake in a different state of mind.
Its within us all, through medication, through exercise, through meditation, even through finding a belief of something more powerful than the demons that reside in our minds and on a bad day our hearts.
Ive been on cymbalta for almost a year, and finally if i had to answer im i sad id truly have to answer NO!
Now that i can say that i have many changes in my life to make, first an foremost i need to start taking care of the body that Ive been abusing during the times when my mind told me i wasn’t worth saving.
No infomercial is going to save me, a goal, a vision, a want to love every aspect of my life to the fullest.
Are there days when i think its impossible, ill never get there…. ABSOLUTELY! but i fight it by occupying my mind with want i want from life, what it is i think i deserve, what i envision my life would be like when not only can i wake loving myself but the loving the skin i’m in.
Maybe this post doesn’t help you or maybe you think that it can never be within your reach to wake feeling happy or for lack of better words ” NORMAL” ,but believe me when i say, you’re worth the effort, your worth the 30 mins it took me to type this, as i really suck at typing, lol
why did i type this in my Google search you ask, well to be honest, i think its good to remind my self on a regular basis of what i once lived with in my head, my heart.
part 2

March 6, 2011 at 5:49 am
(414) Lainee says:

I’m a long way from being the me i want to be, but i know its within my reach, and each and every day i remind myself that!
Know that you can all get there too, with the want and determination, its possible to live life like every day is a day to learn to love the you thats with in you.
peace and love to all that have been affected by loved ones that suffer from depression of any kind and more importantly to all that live with the voices that make them feel less worthy and wanting of the happiness we all deserve. xo

what can i say its long! part 3

March 15, 2011 at 2:21 pm
(415) ava says:

imagine after so many years, people are still searchng “what is wrong with me” I did it a few minutes ago, feeling depressed and down… and up comes this option with so many comments…wow…
We are all in search of something or the other… but with time all our needs should be met… give thanks for what we have cause we never know the next persons problems or issues….

March 19, 2011 at 3:59 am
(416) Matthew says:

I wake up knowing i’ll never accomplished anything…anywayi was thinking about it…and a whole lot of things been going through my head…but i never understand why….i think too much when i just stop thinkin…my mind starts passing by….im always wrong when i try to think i was right….i’ll never be great…even when i try… but i’ll know im always great inside….even outside…everything is changing…my temper is coming back…i feel more depress than ever….and my brother always judges me…let me tell u something that is wrong with my life…im Native american…and everyone around me wants me to be someone im not…and wants me to follow a path.. i’ve changed alot…i made my own path…and everyone judges me…my brother my family and my relatives….and sometimes friends…they tell me who i sould be…now im stuck here always..but i know…they will always love me in my heart…

March 22, 2011 at 10:00 pm
(417) Lucas again says:

Please help all of us, before i play god and DIE.
there are too many of us to ignore. I can’t
Believe this sort of thing hasn’t reached the
news. I guess it has to wait for someone to end
it all and then forgotten after two weeks, if
that. Everyone remember to be strong, and if
your here from bullying, don’t hurt yourself,
not until you make the bully pay. why should
you suffer at the hands of lowlifes like them.
be strong, and never give up.

March 23, 2011 at 1:11 am
(418) Dan says:

amazingly enough i feel a little relieved to know that others have the same question as me, “what is wrong with me?”. unfortunately i dont feel better by just knowing they’re out there. I just feel like im draining myself by doing nothing at all. All i want is to find something worth fighting for so to speak. i have nothing in my life that has any worth. or so it seems.

March 24, 2011 at 5:21 am
(419) ------ says:

I’m turning 21 in 3 days. I have sleep apnea, insomnia, bi-polar, severe depression and anxiety….
I try to believe things get better but nothing ever does. I totaled my second car in 2 months this week sending my brother to the hospital. I got kicked out of highschool and the army. I was confused as to why all these horrible things happen to me until my mom told me that its all my fault.

Medicine doesnt work, youre better off figuring how to rely on yourself and no one else because all you have in the end is you and you only. Life sucks. It just does. Despite all these terrible things and “poor luck” I still try to enhance the lives of those around me and make other people happy.

I will never get better and ive come to terms with this, but maybe im here to help all of you.

So, “what is wrong with me”?
….. nothing. be happy while you can and cheer up. it could ALLWAYS be worse,…somehow.

March 29, 2011 at 1:30 am
(420) kim says:

as everyone else i googled, and here i am.

my life has had many pitfalls and horrific situations, things have changed, i have changed. however one thing remains the same, that sadness, feelings of uselessness, hopelessness, self-condemnation and self-loathing.

i feel like ive made so many mistakes with my children, family, friends, and major life decisions. i live a life where i cannot stand up for myself because i feel like i deserve to be mistreated or that im not worth the fight or energy it would take. ive was married for 18 years i endured emotional abuse untill it became physical. i stayed with a man who raped me. i feel powerless to take care of myself and my kids without his finanical support. in honesty, im very capable of making it…not sure how. but surely i can. (btw after the physical part began i left him, but still havent the courage to divorce him, i let him manipulate me emotionally even now (hes the victim because i wouldnt have sxx when he wanted..so its really my fault he says), dumb arent i? lol) dont let these things make you feel i dont understand because i felt sad long before things became tragic for me, so if you have every reason to be happy and you arent, i know how that feels too.

im sad. all of you have touched my heart. i would love to save us all.

i read an earlier post and feel it really sums what we are dealing with, somehow..somewhere…we are not satisified with our lives. my life is not your life and vice-versa, so my answers are not exactly as yours will be, but here is a quote that i read everyday: “Life is not about finding yourself, Life is about creating yourself.”~unknown author.

i think taking a very long, honest, deep look inside ourselves is in order. i hope we can all find that contentment we so deserve and desire. best of luck to you all <3

May 23, 2011 at 11:37 pm
(421) Steve says:

Hi Kim,
You’re story has touched me the most. Here I am sitting at work bored and like many other readsers googled ‘what is wrong with me?’ You’re story touched me as I think I’m a male version of you. Have 3 beautiful teenage children, which is a HUGE challenge in itself. But I live in a loveless marriage. I have made many, many, many mistakes in my life and they has hurt us all. I keep getting reminded of my uselesness every day by my wife. But i refuse to hit her even though it makes my blood boil. I am abit of a wimp – find it difficult to stick up for myself – always have been like that – picked on at school and never fought back. I lay in bed at times and can’t sleep as my past really haunts me. I suppose I’m trying to toughen up my kids so they dont become like me. My love life is non existant. We have s3x – but not make love! I feel useless, I feel powerless, I feel insignificant. I am a loser – and i hate it!

May 23, 2011 at 11:59 pm
(422) kim says:

Steve,
I so wish I could help! But you aren’t alone. I’m fighting again Today. (with myself of course) I got a msg saying someone had replied so I came to check.
Im around if u need a vent…..sometimes that helps greatly.

kim
ps i dont think not hitting your wife makes you a whimp i think that takes great courage. so hold your head high for that one =)

April 8, 2011 at 4:09 am
(423) Matthew(sorry) says:

i felt the need to pick up a blade…i been feeling alot of temptations to hurt myself…though seems like life is always difficult…but why always on me…i feel like im the one only getting hurt..and everyone else laughs…the only song that cheers me up are sad songs….they take away my pain for me….ijust have a lot of unanswered questions….though i know…only one of them gets answered….

April 25, 2011 at 1:34 pm
(424) maria rivera says:

i dont know whats wrong with me… i tried my best for both of us and he just stopped talking to me. was it my fault? should i have just slept with him? i dont know its been like 5 moths since we talked. i called him on friday in desperate attept to talk to him, it doesnt feel the same when i date other people i just want him to know im sorry for what i did and that i wish he would talk to me….. was it just me?

May 19, 2011 at 4:08 pm
(425) Ray says:

It just pops out, sometimes, and I just can’t help myself but to feel miserably bad. People would think I’m wasting my time right now, but I’m just battling with all the bad habits I have. And I’m not winning. Gosh, I just need a couple of people to whom I could talk to, not this damn crappy machine on which I’m typing. Everything is going fine, it’s just me, somewhere there inside, a problem occured, and I know neither the reason, neither the solution.
Damn.

May 24, 2011 at 12:10 am
(426) kim says:

that might help us all (to have a few people to talk to that understands)……..truth is, we aren’t all down on the same days, so that might work out

Ray I hope you are feeling better Today, if not im sure ppl here (myself inc) wouldnt mind listening.

kim

June 15, 2011 at 8:04 pm
(427) johan says:

had a big fight with my girl about me not having the energy to do anything extra or to take chances but i’m so tired of my life and to be the strong one when i’m clearly sad and don’t know how to face each day

May 29, 2011 at 10:03 pm
(428) Michaela says:

I have been looking at this site for yrs now wondering if i post something will it make me feel any better. Im 20 and i hate my life and everything about me. The poem at the start sums it up perfectly. Everyone things im a happy person buts its all a lie. I can feel absolutely terrible but i will pretend everything is ok cos no one should have to put up with my stuff.
I am healthy but i never feel it and i have bad habits. I smoke and i dont care if its killing me slowly because i deserve it. I drink excessive amounts of v and i know it not good and i dont care. Finally i used to perform acts of sh but have stopped. Ive been free just over 8 mths and I think about doing it again all the time. When I think about why I did it I know its cos im stupid and i deserved it.
I know i am loved. Im with my boyfriend of 8mths and he makes me feel like im worth something and important. It hurts when he says im perfect cos i know im not. Im not perfect im my eyes no matter how much he says i am. I am not skinny enough not pretty enough. My body is ugly and has ugly mark all over it he has only once said something about them on my legs but hasnt mentioned it again I dont even know if he has actually seen my feral arms and just doesnt know what to say or whether he doesnt even know. I have not spoken to him about any of this because i dont know how. I have had a bit of a depressive episode and he didnt seem to understand so i just pretended t be happy and that all was ok. I feel alone because I can’t be 100% me around anyone and no one understands that not everything is ok.
Im tired of trying and i want to do bad things. Its been hard to stay away from it i have been sh for 7yrs now and am struggling to stay away 8 months is the longest i have ever been and atm the only thing that is stopping me is i dont want to hurt my bf and i dont want to explain.i
I dont know what is wrong with me and i don’t know what to do

June 5, 2011 at 1:38 pm
(429) Dilli says:

It’s scary just how many people have typed in “What’s wrong with me?” and yet I have done just the same.

I can rationalise that I have nothing to complain about. I live cheaply and have some spare money left over each week. I have a full time job on more per hour than most jobs around where I live. I see my kids every week but honestly they are doing just fine without me. I have at my fingertips more than enough info to make a really good income online but I can’t bring myself to do it. I don’t do anything or go out. I wear my wedding band as a reminder not to go that route for a third time. I have lots of freedom to do as I please and go when and where I want.

I have a much better life than those around me in terms of responsibilities and yet… I still ask “What’s wrong with me?” “Why do I not make changes to improve my life” “Why do I feel I’m not worth it?”

I’ve read your posts and maybe some of you will read mine but we all know nothing will change.

I wish you all well.

June 22, 2011 at 12:49 pm
(430) Despicableme says:

i feel totally miserable even though its a June Holiday…..

June 25, 2011 at 1:26 am
(431) Anonymous says:

I am 13 years old. I’ve been sexually abused several times by two different people. I like girls, which is a problem because I am a girl. My mom is on drugs so I never see her. My dad thinks I’m a slut because he has caught me sleeping with 3 different guys. He drinks all the time and fights with my stepmom at night when they think I’m asleep. I get really sad all the time and I have tried to kill myself more than once. The nightmares are coming back and I have been having suicidal thoughts again. I’m always angry at the wrong and I fight with everyone at school. I have no friends and I cut myself to make the pain go away. Can someone tell me what is wrong with me?

September 19, 2011 at 9:34 am
(432) Helper says:

Yes, I can. You’re fake.

July 11, 2011 at 8:08 am
(433) Thomas says:

What is wrong with me?
Nothing says the voice
then start living; youll see
its just a matter of choice.

start feeling good
and youll feel better
start giving gratitude
and youll feel happier

start forgiving yourself
and youll soon forgive others
start loving yourself
and before long youll love others

youll be amazed
by the transformation
that will take place
when ‘whats right with me?’
is the best replace

xxxxx

July 23, 2011 at 1:16 am
(434) marie cotton says:

Browsing thru a lot of these comments, I realize many people can say the same thing. I googled ‘what is wrong with me?’ And a miiilion oppinions from so many caring people popped up. I’m glad I’m not the only one :) :):):): looove yourself!

August 2, 2011 at 7:47 am
(435) Mia says:

Like the most of you guys I also googled “what is wrong with me”…
I always feel watched and I always feel that people are judging me,like I`m never good enough..no matter how hard I try I`m still the ugliest one among my sisters , I`m still the odd one out among my friends and I`m always the “weird one”.
no matter how hard I try I`m always ..not enough. not smart enough ,not pretty enough …I`m just …If I met me I would hate her..she is so stupid and she is always caring about what people think about her.I just hate me.

August 23, 2011 at 12:12 pm
(436) Steve says:

Finding this website gave me a mixture of comfort and terror. Comfort, because it gave me a tremendous feeling of not being alone with the thoughts and feelings that have hounded me for years; and terror, because reading the accounts of other people reinforces that these thoughts and feelings are not just in my head, but are actually very real experiences that negatively affect a significant portion of the population, and no simple remedy is known.

I feel it – I instinctively know that I should not feel like this. How on earth can it be normal for the very core of my being to be sucked down into such a deep and black sadness that nothing at al seems worthwhile? And this, caused by no actual event whatsoever? Yet other days I can be so happy and in love with the beauty of the world and the people in it that I could just hug people in the street.

It is frightenting to me because I cannot account for where the differences in these behaviours come from. I cannot doubt that both come entirely from “me” (whatever that is) , but it feels me with dread to realise that I have no idea how I work or how I will react or will feel about anything at any time in the future. Planning becomes futile, and trying to maintain any sort of consistency in work/relationships is incredibly difficult and untimately, as has been proved time and time again, doomed to failure.

I can’t help but feel that I am so very close to an understanding of myself and of happiness and success, but always feel as if some vital key is just out of reach, just beyond my comprehension or ability, and I remain here scrambling, reaching, flailing, desperate for some sort of guidance as to how to complete the puzzle. But after so many years I have to reluctantly accept that there is indeed something wrong, and as a result I have chosen to withdraw from everyone and everything. I no longer want to see my affliction negatively affect those around me. I no longer have the energy to lie my way through questions from friends, family, colleagues, and to force myself to do what I think they expect. There is nothing left for me; I simply will fade away.

My heart goes out to all who feel this way and to those whose loved ones are inconsolable with this affliction.

September 3, 2011 at 2:05 pm
(437) Lauren says:

Seriously! I am not alone! Why don’t I feel better? I ask for help I take my meds and I want to be healthy. I dont drink at all, sober for over twenty years and don’t use street drugs or narcotics. Yet I still feel stuck. I am in the healthiest relationship I have ever been in, I am treated with dignity and respect. I just don’t get whats wrong with me. I have a mood disorder, anxiety and depression so I am told. But why have I started lying and stealing again what is it in me that thinks what I am and what I have isn’t enough? Im not enough. Why am I sabotaging myself. I have become undiciplined again. I need a regular schedule for meetings, connections with other women, to get honest and to start praying again. I, me alone is causing this mental isolation. I have to get out of myself and help others as hard as that sounds right now I know it works. My mind is a dangerous place to spend too much time alone in. I dont want to become suicidal again or wind up in treatment again. I need to remember the positive things and make a gratitude list. Its just a start, but a beginnig is better than nothing.

I am alive and breathing.
I woke up sober and went to bed sober.
I have a wonderful man in my life
I have a lovely apartment.
I have electricity and running water.
I have two wonderful healthy grown children and two terriffic grandghildren.
I have a God in my life who never turns away from me.
My parents, grandmother, brother are all alive and I am 50 years old.
I am attractive, I am intelligent, I am friendly, I am well liked, I am a hard worker.
I have a job.
I have a car. I have a cat. Meow… feeling a little better.
Um. I still feel guilty about calling out of work and telling them I’m sick wiht the flu. That still feels shitty. But Im taking a mental health day and most people dont understand that. Th Blues…. why do they have to be so overwhelming? God has a plan. I will be ok. No matter what as long as i remember to ask for help and dont drink.

September 19, 2011 at 9:29 am
(438) Nobody says:

Like the rest of you , i googled what is wrong with me and then i realised, there is nothing wrong with me. Its whats wrong with all of you out there. You are alll lame, pathetic depressed people. This will cheer you up. No one loves you.

November 5, 2011 at 6:23 am
(439) Braden says:

All you need is a good voice and a band, and you’ll be legendary for those lyrics!

December 1, 2011 at 6:10 am
(440) Jason says:

Not reassuring people feel the same, hate my life, hate my personality, can’t get long with anyone and had a friend for years, drink and smoke and hoping I get cancer just to end this shit existence!!!!

December 1, 2011 at 11:44 am
(441) Marc says:

The worst feeling for me is that I know that the depression feeling is gonna occur again. Now I feel more depressed than ever. I started with anti-depressants some months ago, but didn’t notice anything after a months use, and I talked to my coworker who is a 10 year older women and she is awesome to talk to and i felt better. Then after 3 weeks depression kicked in worse than ever.

I have now started to take Lexapro for like a week, it helped my brother who was kinda depressed. Like most of you, I have a pretty good life on the outside. Getting by in a study field I wanna work in, have a great family, a bunch of pretty solid friends and I look kinda good (people tell my this and girls seems to be attracted even if I act like a asocial bore). Like last weekend a girls stopped me after the club, we go to the same school and she wanted to become friends on facebook. She looked kinda good too. So I should be happy, and I know that like a week ago I would’ve asked this girl out and had a nice time, but now I am worried that she might think I’m boring and that she might notice somethings wrong with me.

I really hope that these medications work, cuz i’m getting tired of gettin extreme depressed periods. been thinking about suicide because i can’t cope with my life being like this forever. a well, i’m 24, so i guess i have my “whole life in front of me” as many ppl say. i know that in a couple of days/ weeks i will feel better, I just hate the knowledge that i will feel depressed after that thoug. Aw well, take care everybody!

January 6, 2012 at 5:01 pm
(442) Feelin Down says:

I don’t know why I feel like this, but the fact of the matter is that I literally have absolutely nothing. My life seems like a total waste. I have no friends, no job, no car, I basically have nothing to do but watch the time pass. It’s sad, but with no other alternatives I am basically living each day as if it is my last. Never in my life did I expect to become this way but there is nothing that I can do other than accept it.

January 16, 2012 at 11:04 pm
(443) Jovana says:

I am terrified of myself its sad I have everything two baby boys a husband who loves me and yet I feel lost and confused and scared I lash out alot I get angry for no reason im abusive to him I cant control myself I havent gotten check but illness run in my family I just dont know what to do I dont want to do anything just be alone have horrible thoughts anger issues I dont like who I am becoming im scared for my family I feel like I shouldnt even be with them I dont kno what to I feel like a horrible person

February 27, 2012 at 3:03 pm
(444) mehere says:

Hey Nobody (438), you might be the most hurt one here.. sorry.

March 8, 2012 at 4:03 am
(445) mark says:

If I ask myself the question “what is wrong with me?”, I get the answer that it is focus. Either I am unfocused on what I need to be, or I am unable to see clearly enough to focus. There is nothing wrong with me. Fear has clouded my sight, and makes me do things which feed something else, not what makes me grow. We all have the power, but sometimes we need help in coming back to it. There is no shame in asking for help. I do not believe that all people need drugs, in fact, I think it is a rare event to require such interventions. Physical manipulations, such as Chiropractic, massage, or physio/ physical exercise, or spiritual, such as Reiki, or meditation, or prayer. Simple things can be what we need to refocus, and not let ourselves be torn asunder. With Love, be free.

July 17, 2012 at 2:38 pm
(446) Jerome says:

@438: It’s always impressive a person kicks a man when he’s down. Says an *awful* lot more about you than who you’re kicking.
Like many of you good people, I’ve had terrible problems. I’m really trying to turn it round but it’s … so … hard. It’s all completely unfair, and you look to the skies and ask “why me?” and there’s no answer and so it goes. Fairness is a man-made concept not manifested *anywhere* in nature so you’d best forget about all that or you’ll be constantly disappointed.
I can tell you this much: I think the way we are living now in Western society is extremely negative(or at least has potential to be) and is very far removed from the world human beings inhabited for the vast majority of our existence as a species. I do not think we were meant to be born into slavery for money. I think we are hunter gatherers, aboriginals, meant to live and work in small groups and do everything for that group. The advent of agriculture has forcibly exiled us all from this existence and delivered us to this. We’ve lost our tribal and spiritual lives along the way. While I do not fully understand it, I think the absence of a spiritual life is at the heart of most of the mental disorders we suffer. We’ve been tricked into thinking it’s all material and there’s no such thing as spirit. Big mistake I think. I don’t believe pharmaceuticals address this, although they may numb the aching limb.
It is my strong belief that THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU! However there is a huge problem with the environment, education system, system of slavery and society that you were born into, were nurtured by, broken by, packaged by and ultimately serve. All you can try to do is limit the damage by trying to heal your spirit and that, unfortunately, is up to you alone. I have not cracked this yet but I’m told meditation, martial arts, creative endeavours, and possibly aya huasca(under shamanic supervision only) are a good place to start. All good things to you all.

August 2, 2012 at 6:47 pm
(447) Helena says:

Glad and sad that others feel like this too at the moment well actually I’ve been feeling like this for quite some time now it feels as if I’ve lost track of what I wanted to do in life and where I wanted to be I look at my life so far and think to myself what have I done really? I have had no worthwile job and have no good qualifications I’ve only jsut found a job after being smei out of work for a year but it isnt good and isnt what I’d say is enjoyable but yea ok it is something at least and I should eb grateful because of what the job market is like but I do know that this work is only tempory and that if i dnt find a job in the meantime till ti ends then I will end up going back on the dole and I jsut can’t face it its one of the main things that get me down I can’t seem to focus on any of the positive things that must be there somewhere in my life I can only think of the bad and depressin things I would never actually commit sucide because I knw that if i did it would be for real and it to em is like taking the cowards way out I don’t talk or want to talk about these things to anyone profesional or “real” internet is just easier anyway can feel my mind wandering again as it so often does whihc is also another worrying point I guess but meh thx for reading

August 9, 2012 at 3:26 am
(448) dual diagnosis treatment centers says:

Your current treatment requires one complete different talk to to cure only because it involves
a detox of body combined with therapies for the alcohol and
drug abuse. Since material abuse recovery won’t one- dimensional, a treatment couldn’t get either.

August 16, 2012 at 10:12 pm
(449) Amel says:

i am a teenage girl & the thing is i am average at everything(not really good at school)& i always have the wrong friends i try to be nice & helpful but always end up getting hurt & betrayed.i know that i am a people pleasure i care about what people think of me & i have a lack of confidence & sometimes think I’m ugly though i believe no one is ugly & yet i do.i date boys i don’t like so i can never get hurt & always cheat on them to show i don’t care & i never fight for what i want because I’m afraid if i lost after trying it’ll just kill me so i pretend i don’t care.i had this friend whom i loved so much & i loved her more than any person in the world after years of friendship i started to get jealous of her because she is prettier & smarter & i hated that she could get what she wants & to be honest she works hard for what she wants & sometimes she can go very low & seduce & act slutty to get it & i know I’m not ready to sell myself for stuff so i just can’t but i hate it when she does it & that’s not the thing thing i hate about her the fact is i have a big family but always we have fights & problems at home & my parents hate each other & my father is an asshole cheater & my mother always pouring her anger on us & it’s just so hurtful & when i see my friend with her family i just can’t stand how much they get along & we never do & to make things worse is that when i want something she wants it to so i always back off & pretend i don’t care..how pathetic! & the good thing about my life is that my father is rich but that only gets me hatred.people looking at me like a snob & others trying to take advantage of me & that’s the main reason boys ask me out.so i am hated,stupid,ugly and i have no special talent unless you consider being able to speak 3 languages a one

August 27, 2012 at 5:54 am
(450) seo company in birmingham says:

You can certainly see your enthusiasm in the work you write.
The world hopes for more passionate writers like you who are not afraid to
mention how they believe. Always go after your heart.

September 10, 2012 at 1:46 am
(451) Clown make-up says:

The office is like a prison. I have my own office and close the door to keep outside noise out.
I stare at my e-mail inbox and wait for the next one to arrive. I count them, at the moment 1500 e-mails.
I stand up and go to the water cooler or coffee station every 15 minutes, I then have to go to the toilet.
I watch the clock to not give them any extra time when the work-day is done. I want to quit every morning, afternoon or evening. Thing is, I was let go a few years ago and I was even more depressed and alone for the 4 months until a got a new job.
Although the pressure resulted in my my team dwindling from 6 to 2, I don’t talk about the job pressure with my spouse and it’s eating me alive. This is because at least I know the most important thing is to show up.
One Saturday and Sunday I sleep in for 10 hours or longer from the Seroquel. If the alarm doesn’t go off during the week and I don’t need to go to work, and I was alone, I sleep until lunch.
My libido is gone…
I sit in a coffee shop before work, trying to put on the clown make-up for another week.
I’m medicated, I’m not manic anymore, but still melancholic. Like a functioning alcoholic, I’m a functioning manic-depressive.
This week must be better

September 10, 2012 at 4:21 pm
(452) lori ann cordell says:

i am in the same boat as all of you,, i cant even go out side,, i try but i cant.. i have a friend that is takeig care of me. thank god hes here. i pray but wene i stop praying it all comes back, i know its going to sound crazy but i think this thing we are all going thru are made by the devil.. wene will god save us ..

September 28, 2012 at 11:43 pm
(453) Robin says:

I dont know what to do any more. I have been on an off meds for bi polar and for manic depression and I never see an improvement in any way. My hole life is so screwed up. It always has been but within the last year its been worse then ever. I cry just about Every Single Day. I hate myself so much but I always think about one person that keeps me sain. My daughter. She means the world to me and I am not giving up on life yet. I have to keep going to be here for her. We all go through so much but their has to be atleast one thing in life that we love and dont want to lose. We have to be strong. So many days I have been ready to end it but I am still here so their is a reason for me to be here. I just have to work harder on being strong to pull through this. Every one of us do have a reason. We all need to be strong. Hang in their people. You r not alone. Alot of people do understand what we r going through and we all will get past it all and make it through.

October 3, 2012 at 12:22 am
(454) Julio says:

Wow the guy/girl above me got deep and feel the same way I feel lost and my whole life is screwed up and also alone but two important things that we should focus on is CHANGE and INSPIRATION cause change we need to better our life’s and not do the same thing over and over again we need to go foward in life and inspiration to motivate us to keep fighting every day and not lose hope would be another meaning for inspiration we need more sites like this to cheer us up and I wish you all good luck we all got to release all of these emotions bottled inside of us which we should never do but some people over do it thank you all

October 4, 2012 at 10:40 pm
(455) LS says:

Exercise, healthy eating, socializing, and consciously try to think about things in a positive, it will pass.

October 24, 2012 at 5:49 pm
(456) sandy says:

i feel always like that.. i’m always depressed about everything , i hate a lot of things these day and i can’t sleep or eat or to be happy for once .. i live in a world of imagination to try to make me happy .. i’m so confused

November 5, 2012 at 8:10 pm
(457) Bob33 says:

I know many people are suffering in ways that so often go unrecognized. I have probably read 100 of these comments and i spent a lot of that time relating these people to the things that infest my life. I have dealt with periods of over over-whelming depression and anxiety that have affect my me since I was a child. I am now 33, married to a vietnamese woman whom i met while working at the Grand Canyon Arizona. I love this woman very much. However, we have troubles and things are not going well at this moment. It is hard for me to deal with and had to call off work tonight because off the anxiety.
So many of you understand this! I feel mentally crippled. It becomes very difficult to be beautiful inside when your mind is tormenting you and your wife has the patience level not suitable to speak with me. I feel confused and things got out of control again. I know she loves me but she took her wedding ring off before she went to work. It hurt so bad that i went to work and told them i needed the night off. Oh, and we work at the same restaurant. She can turn a cold shoulder to me when she gets upset and it hurts so much for me. Yet it happens to often. What is wrong with me?

November 5, 2012 at 10:34 pm
(458) Robert says:

Depression í rough

November 20, 2012 at 1:59 pm
(459) irena says:

Idk what to do with my life. I feel like nothing matters. Was dating someone maybe for 2months, which is a rediciloustime to fall for someone but I did. He made me soo happy, never been happier but we broke up. I wonder if its something wrong with me to fall for someone that quick and don’t get over it. I think I might have a dependent personality disorderbc I could never say no to this guy but he always pushes me away. Idk I just dc about anything anymore

November 21, 2012 at 5:29 am
(460) Susan says:

I can’t.find joy..my memory. Is horrible ..sleep. not. So great..been on meds in the past..so whats the answer..stay medicated any suggestions

November 24, 2012 at 10:50 pm
(461) Christine says:

I FEEL THE SAME WAY!! I am so bored of life. When I am surrounded by friends and family I still feel so lonesome. Even though i sleep more than usual, i feel exhausted. I still don’t want to kind of live. I am only 13, though. And I want to see my future still. But I still feel this. I plan to escape here. But there are some things stopping me. Now I want to live. But I somehow still don’t.

November 25, 2012 at 5:41 pm
(462) Jim says:

Wow. I had no idea there were so many of us out there who feel alike. Like many posts I’ve read here, I too, feel like I have all too many reasons to feel happy, yet can’t seem to grasp the idea of BEING happy. I feel like I’ve failed at life. I’m 37, married, with 3 children. My wife has a great job. I’ve been a union painter for 12 years, but have only worked maybe 7-8 of them. Always laid off. I thought maybe that contributed a lot to the feeling of failure, because nothing makes a man feel less than that, like not being able to provide for his family. I feel sometimes, like maybe I should’ve taken a different path in life, but had that been the case, I wouldn’t have met my wife of 13 years, or had the three wonderful kids that I love so dearly. But all of the things I used to love so much, like playing my guitar or drums, playing on Xbox live, going camping or out to eat, or have others over for a dinner party… They don’t even appeal to me at ALL. Why? What changed in my life in the last 2 years that’s made me a completely different, bitter, self-centered unsociable…. hell, I don’t know, introvert? Hermit? Homebody? I don’t like anything anymore. And I can go from crying my eyes out in the morning, to a fit of rage by midday. I’m utterly disgusted by me. I don’t like myself anymore, and I thought maybe being able to realize that was a sign that I just needed to suck it up and that nothing’s really wrong. But OTHERS probably don’t like me either. What do I do? I’m at the end of a rope that’s frayed and getting harder to hold onto every minute. Any advice would be seen as godsend. Thanks for listening.

November 26, 2012 at 9:08 am
(463) ashley says:

I am glad there is google and that I can read through all these. I don’t understand why I feel down when I’m supposed to feel happy. It’s like nothing seems normal anymore. My days are filled with emptiness and that i’m just half happy about everything. And its true that people don’t understand, and sometimes they think i’m just being dramatic. I’m just 27.. how am I going to be for the rest of my life???

December 29, 2012 at 3:56 pm
(464) mimou says:

I’m in the same road here ………i cant understand my self…….thinking too much…feeling too much……i m drived by emotions ….
i endded up here like all of you guys …by asking google (im not understanding whats the matter with me)..
before getting here ..i thought it was only me having that kinda of weird thing in my soul …a black hole in my mind …unlimited thoughts….i see things not like my friends ..
it looks from like i m observer too…of how things goes in life ….its looks more a dream than reality……..
and i never had answer ..why this is happening to me

January 19, 2013 at 11:49 am
(465) tracey says:

I’ve been diagnosed for a while with bi-polar it is a funny disease. One day i’m painting the house for a day the next day I’m sleeping and miserable.I’m also a recovering alcoholic and drug addict so that masked the fact that I was bipolar. I still have my good and bad days or weeks. Medications have helped but I still have to mess with different cocktails when i have my bouts of depression. i was doing really well at first but was in a bad accident and had a traumatic brain injury so that really messed with my mental state. I get the whole alone in a room full of people feeling and just want to be left alone at times. i really wish I had some words of wisdom for ya but I’m at a loss for words. Keep up with your shrinks and med checks and don’t leave out any symptoms your having, so you don’t fall in to trouble. Good luck with your recovery and remember your not alone even if you feel you are.

March 1, 2013 at 3:44 pm
(466) jesse cr says:

mye i am. happy one minute. and unloved the next its a part of my child. Hood growing. was i Foster child pit in homes were i around complete. strangers..

March 1, 2013 at 4:32 pm
(467) jesse cr says:

i Google up why do i feel happy one minute and confused. the next and i how i end up here i ws depressed for many years of it was life let’s not eat my food. at time my body got weakened because. i. felt do and My. friends and family only if they understood how get some help for me and stick. with it but instead the put me in to mental instructions have any of you expected this in one from or another. thanks for hear me out.

April 17, 2013 at 5:45 am
(468) mark says:

Wow, so many people asking the same question. I suffer terribly with a feeling of worthlessness somedays and then others like I could take on the world. Having read so many of the comments its seems again, so many people with the same problem. Is it because we focus on something negative that has happened in our lives perhaps at that specific time or maybe from a mental scar in the past. In doing so we then find it hard to open our gaze back onto the rich beauty that we all know surrounds us. Hmmm., its hard isn’t it?
Good clean food, exercise and social interaction help me when I realise I’ve dipped. I work alone with my horse and dog in the forests of Norfolk in England for most of the winter. Felling is hard on the body, but the solitude is harder still on the mind. I had a partner till 8 weeks or so ago. We’ve separated and all that made so much sense then no longer seems to. Her love helped get me to the end of each day. So here I am in this gargantuan mire of self pity. Where even the happy sounds of our long awaited spring cannot reach me. I know tho that I will rise from this and must allow my gaze to widen again. I know I will start to drink in the beauty that mother nature has provided for me to embibe. But I still can’t help but wonder.

April 23, 2013 at 10:17 pm
(469) Kendall says:

i think there might be something wrong with me like i was really upset on saturday and apparently i did alot of shouting and i said somethings and i was freaking out and ripping out my hair and the weird part is i dont remember doing any of this and i dont remember what i did yesterday and sometimes i get really really silly and i kind of act really insane and like im on drugs and i cant controll it and i feel just really out of control and then after that i feel really sick and i cry and get angry an sleep for days

like is this bi polar disorder like what the hell is happening i mean i have been like this for a while but its just making sense now…

May 6, 2013 at 11:00 am
(470) PJ says:

All my life as far back as I can remember I have always struggled with the feelings sadness, hopelessness, and anger. At small moments in between I will feel on top of the world like I can be anything and do anything and I feel so happy and excited but that moment never stays for long and then I’m back to asking myself why does any of it matter…My mind is always going thinking of ways to feel better, to do better but then I lose interest and say to myself you can do that but its not going to change anything so don’t even worry about it. I have people that I love but even when they prove they love me I still question it I still feel as though they don’t..I’m just always at the point of I’m so tired of fighting but I don’t want to give up…I feel so exhausted…I don’t want to be numb but I don’t want to keep feeling this way….

May 10, 2013 at 4:36 am
(471) John Moon says:

People do not understand I have a 141 IQ I cannot spell or even sound like I am even smart. I have a hard time telling people what they really need to know and understand. I was taken by the grays in 1969. After that my family treated me like a freak. I saw what a native american shaimen “sorry I cannot spell” was an omen. But still people make fun of me I was born on 4/1 so it is easy to make fun of me. But I know a lot of mechanical and things about life. I went to a place where he could not explain me knowing about life. He said that I was just able to understand it. I just want to know what happened to me when I was taken. They left me a lone when I found out what they were doing to me. I still have the transmiter in me. But every time the call out to me they just leave me alone. I fell like John Conner sometimes but yet I feel so weak. Let me know I am sane.

May 17, 2013 at 11:58 pm
(472) dominique says:

I’m also one that googled “what is wrong with me” & ended up here. I don’t even know where to begin. I was diagnosed with depression last year & the pills I’m on I don’t even think are working, either that or they are and I just have a bigger problem…like bipolar disorder. I’m going to see a paychiatrist and hopefully she can help me out, but I’m in denial about being depressed so if I get diagnosed with this too I still won’t believe it. But really though, what is a diagnosis? What is a disease? What is a mental disorder? labels. I’m “depressed” but I do have some energy to get out of bed. Then they’ll tell me I’m bipolar (which I might be) just because I’m pissy all the time and literally hate everyone. It may be true, but think about it…. it’s just words. Anyway, I have to bite my tongue so hard so I don’t tell people what I’m really thinking. Some days I feel so loving and caring & other days I feel like hurting people. sometimes this change happens between different consecutive HOURS. so…. what is wrong with me?! Am I bipolar? Am I some other mental disorder? Or am I just going through a phase? Humans are like this… aren’t they?

June 11, 2013 at 10:35 pm
(473) bc says:

so here I am..another number in another pool of individuals..here is my quick story..abused by parents, orphanage, raped by male staff repeatedly, 4 yrs later (age 9) “mother” gets me..brother molests kid, I catch him…don’t tell for 25 years…1st marriage failed, 1 kid…this marriage 16 years 2 more kids….ex kept son in anotherstate for 13 years re-united and we are great! so here is why I am here…since Sunday I have eaten only a cup of noodle(Sunday) and feel like I need to punish me…crying as I type…so nsecure about who I am and feel like a serious loser..no meds…DVT in right leg, don’t care anymore…have no will to fight or to help myself..convinced that the SS for kids is better than me being around…..ALSO

extremely smart, can see what is coming, no desire to stop it… now the 64 cent question…Why? why cant I stop smashing on myself, I know where train leads to, I can type it now, yet I cannot stop feeling like I deserve nothing…so after 35+ years of fighting these feelings…what will stop me? Is there someone out there who can relate?

June 26, 2013 at 5:24 pm
(474) jr says:

count me in too. I have been having a rough go at it with so much anxiety,
fear and anger. But I have to keep reminding myself to let go of all of this toxic negative energy. All it does is bog me down. I have to remind myself to take one day at a time. Just because today is not good does not mean tomorrow will be the same. I have to keep reminding myself for me that is that feelings are not facts. I have to keep saying to myself this to shall pass and it always does. I pray for a new attitude and a new way for myself to look at things differently each day. I have to learn to be more easy on myself for no one is perfect and I must accept myself for who I am. Acceptance. That is what I have a hard time acknowledging. But i am working at it and trying to move forward with strength today.

August 7, 2013 at 5:06 pm
(475) Paul says:

I don’t seem to care about anything concerning myself any more. And similar to 473 bc i too see things coming and I just let it happen.
I can’t help not wanting to try any more and i’m well aware that it’s in my control to change that, but i can’t stop being this way. I think so much clearer when depression hits, it freaks me out and it makes me realise that i hate reality. The only way i can cope is to get high and not appear to be high around others 24/7:-(. I still hope one day soon i will have the confidence to live a normal life, and to embrace natural feelings without being uncomfortable around others and by myself. Depression is not the problem in my case, it’s me who’s the problem, i seem to except it as the norm.
Hopefully i will clear this head and be normal by the time i’m dead, else if there actually is an afterlife it is gonna be a real bummer, and for eternity too lol. BOLLOCKS TO THAT! I see others here have got more sense than i have reading through gives me around 10 minutes of clarity without the insanity, but 10 minutes doesn’t get me through a day. Good luck to all. Keep fighting.

August 7, 2013 at 5:45 pm
(476) Paul says:

446 jerome you make alot of sense imo. Good luck to everybody here <3

January 23, 2014 at 8:56 am
(477) depressed5 says:

Trust me you will know when things are unbearable, and you on the edge. You will feel like killing yourself like I do……….

February 6, 2014 at 2:51 pm
(478) lfe says:

Life is hard and full of ups and downs. Its not easy at all..glad to know im not the only one who feel like this! This article really helped

February 8, 2014 at 7:48 pm
(479) Julie says:

I think I’m going crazy and I’m pushing my family away. I don’t know what to do. I’m so lost…… My body doesn’t even know the feeling of happiness or love anymore. It’s almost painful. I struggle every day to take care of my children. I keep it to myself because I fear people might think I’m just trying to get attention or something. Most days I’m breathless and full of anxiety. My counselor thinks its just panic disorder but he doesn’t actually know how much turmoil I’m in from day to day. Someone please tell me something that might break this haze I’m in. I have two wonderful, beautiful children and this isn’t fair to them.

February 28, 2014 at 5:30 pm
(480) jason says:

I have paraniod’schizophrenia(mild case)&bipolar disorder&depression,and yet-I love the Lord&the saviour’jesus Christ.so,how can I be in the center?you,can either,love one and despite’ the other/is what I am told?

March 12, 2014 at 2:51 am
(481) Click here says:

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(483) www.rebelmouse.com says:

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